kristanp's Xanga

Friday, October 20, 2006

Fri, 20 Oct 2006 21:06:57 GMT

Sometimes I feel as though I live life half-hearted almost because what matters to me just isn't my life yet. Like, teaching. I do my assignments half way because it doesn't matter to me. I know I won't use them in a classroom and they are just busy work. I don't put that much effort into school because I don't want to GO to school for the rest of my life, I want to TEACH it! Nothing right now in my life seems that important because it's a transition period where I am stepping toward what matters. All that I've ever desired is to be a teacher and to have a family. I'm almost a teacher and no where near having a family, which is fine. I'm not ready for that yet. But this whole college life is going to mold me into this person that God wants me to be in the future. It's an important step in my life, but it doesn't feel like it because it's not what I want out of life. If that makes sense and if it doesn't, sorry, but I guess it doesn't have to make sense to you because it does to me! :)

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Thu, 05 Oct 2006 14:29:21 GMT

So DO recommended a book called The Heavenly Man and I am going to tell you guys that you absolutely HAVE to read this book. I read the first five pages and was pumped up about God in a way I haven't been for awhile.

It's Brother Yun's story. If you don't know who he is, LOOK HIM UP! He is a missionary who's life is a living testimony of God's grace, mercy, protection, guideance, strength, love, compassion, power, soverignty, heart, etc. etc. etc. I don't want to tell you too much because I don't want to spoil the book, but seriously, try and find it. If you can't, at least take five minutes to look this dude up online or something. His story is a story that NEEDS to be heard and will give you joy in the Lord and will strengthen your faith. LOVE IT!

Friday, September 29, 2006

Fri, 29 Sep 2006 23:20:37 GMT

It's so cool to see the person you were and the person God wants you to be in the future. I experience glimpses of that person he wants me to be now and it's such an amazing feeling... the hard part is getting there.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Fri, 22 Sep 2006 19:14:24 GMT

So i'm thinking I might teach in Willis ISD at Turner Elementary. It's such a great school! I absolutely love my experience so far there. This school is so positive and all the teachers are all about helping us future teachers. I've never been in a school where the teachers walk by you and start a coversation with YOU... normally, it's the student teacher starting conversation with the mentor teachers. It's pretty great. I can't describe the welcomeness and the positivity that this school gives... and, we would have a choice to team teach or have a self-contained classroom. How cool is that? Options are great!

I have gotten to know so many teachers there and they have all helped me out tremendously! I feel like I can go to any of them for advice and they wouldn't have the mentality of "she's trying to take my job, so I'm not going to give her ANY advice," I haven't heard any of the teachers talking badly about the kids in a hositle manner. Normally, all I hear are bad stories about kids who have behavior problems or teachers make fun of them for doing something. Not cool. It's nice to see a school that is not negative for a change.

I think I'm going to ask Mrs. Anderson to pull some strings and see if I can't student teach at Turner.

Not to mention, if I got a job there, I'd be able to wear flip-flops! Yea! :)

So yeah, I'm thinking about working there when I graduate...

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Sat, 16 Sep 2006 03:51:03 GMT

So God is stinkin awesome! He has totally blessed me. I have finally gotten my financial aid in!!!! It only took a month and I really wanted to go in there and yell at people because it's been so long and I have had bills due; but I refrained. Therefore, God gave me ANOTHER GRANT!! Basically, my senior year is paid for in grants and I get about $4,000 back each semester. It's so awesome to see how God blesses you when you are patient and pray continually.

Heard like five minutes of a sermon the night of the UT/Ohio State game and was blown away by this:

"Jesus did not come to redeem us from God... he came to redeem us from the law."

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Thu, 14 Sep 2006 02:14:19 GMT

we have the internet! :) and cable! I am plugged into the world again.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Sun, 20 Aug 2006 19:57:42 GMT

My room is all finished! YAY! Thank you to Monica and Bryan for helping me get my bookshelf and a T.V. stand. I painted my dresser yesterday as well, which was way exciting. I still need to put another coat on the drawers, but it looks fun.

Went to church today and was surprised HUGELY to see Laura Elder walking around. It was actually really funny because I'd thought about her all last night, the way to church, and when I got in church. Since the church was PACKED and I couldn't find anyone, I sat with Cole, who wanted to sit with Josh & Chris O. so I went with. It was so fun to see them again, even if it was only for 20-30 min. after church. I love and miss that family dearly.

School starts tomorrow. Yikes.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Sat, 12 Aug 2006 02:35:31 GMT

I am ready for school to start and mostly because I would like something to do. I'm kind of nervous about starting methods this semester and my professor has already sent us an email telling us to enjoy our last few days of freedom. It's going to be exciting and hard but I'm ready to be done!

This summer has been amazing. I didn't realize that until these past few weeks when I saw all that God did around me at camp and within myself. At camp I learned a lot about my true character and for the first time took a deeper look at myself. Let me tell you, that was not fun for me. I saw all the things that I knew about myself but never cared too much to look at the implications of what i say and do. I was pushed harder than I have ever been pushed before and I honestly thought I'd never come out of hating myself but then I realized that God was showing me the things about me that keep me from knowing Him the way He deserves to be known in my life. I realized that although we all think that we are true servants of Christ, we really aren't. Deep down when we are exhausted and at the end of ourselves I found myself not wanting to walk 20 feet to open a door for someone and that is lame. I would rather make someone walk all the way around the building when I can walk 20 feet and open it for them. We can always serve better and harder and place others before ourselves. Phillippians 3 tells us that "our attitude should be as that of Christ Jesus, who being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking on the very nature of a servant and became obedient, even to death on a cross." (and I'm sorry if that's a little wrong, it's by memory)

Although I am glad to be back and finished with camp, I'm going to miss the kids and the reason I went to camp. The last week was so amazing for me because I got to go out with a group that touched my heart. I also realized that when I graduate, I don't think I'd be scared or nervous to work with urban kids. I met a kid, Shawn, that changed my life and that I wanted to take home in my pocket.

I complained about the messiness of camp so much in my head that it took me 2 weeks after I left to realize the impact it had on my heart. God is amazing.

On a lighter note: I heard a story the other night about a dog who peed on a poodle twice. He owned the poodle. It was funny, right Brittany! :)

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Thu, 10 Aug 2006 18:31:35 GMT

I had to give up my puppy today. It was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do. So if anyone knows someone who would want an adorable puppy, go to the animal shelter. Grace is there.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Thu, 20 Jul 2006 21:30:12 GMT

10 days of camp.... and then 6 days until the beautiful Krit gets MARRIED! :)