life was better when it was easier to forget.

to forget people.
to forget things i can't love anymore.

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No, Mark, this has nothing to do with you.

i am so alone now
and i'm starring at the wall
and my bright red hand print
left from last night's fights and brawls
with a pair of scissors
can you tell i lost
but you always will
when everything you want comes at so high a cost
to everyone you love
and in open heart everything is hit or miss with the snapping of
off white nylon gloves
you only know how
to hurt me with your absence
it's not your fault
but the edges of the broken glasses
i have chosen pain
over missing you to death
just to see how much you love me
with the feeling in your breathe
i count the scars and think back to why i did them
how good it felt to be alive so please
tell me you remember how to love
i don't believe you so convince me

you are the sound before rain
you are the blood in my veins

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i want a girlfriend.....

i'm so tired.

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i want a girlfriend, i'm kind of bored with guys now, i want to take a break for a while... well unless Mark wants to fly here and be my boyfriend...which i'll have to wait for...

i guess everyone already knows i'm bi, since whoever told. it's not the worst thing in the world, no one even reads this anymore anyway.

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maybe i'm too young to think like i do.

when does social security set in?
i think i'm getting wrinkels.
i've done nothing with my life.

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it's thundering outside...