It's amazing how so many guys are looking for that elusive true love when they BARELY have any relationship experience. What makes them think that if they did find their true love, they would know how to keep them? Maybe they should just settle for something less than true love, learn how to treat women, learn how to communicate, and then maybe they have a shot at true love.
I'm probably a bit harsh, but think about it.
This entry was inspired by the most ridiculous guy I've ever met in my entire life. Delusional men are the most dangerous. Men who have no clue how love works is dangerous. Men who think they know what love is also dangerous. And they're not bad people. They're not like the "bad boys" you hear. They're just clueless, and in their unacceptance that they're clueless, they hurt the women around them.
I don't mind getting hurt, but when I see other women getting hurt, that triggers deep anger. I almost feel a duty to protect these women. Well, not that I don't mind getting hurt. I just rarely get hurt unless I've fallen madly in infautation with a guy. Only mad mad physical attraction can screw me up royally (remember Taiwan guy?!). Other than that, it's easy to intellectualize everything the other person does, and I maintain my independence and nonchalance. The upside is, I can maintain my distance and feel okay. The downside is, I'm not so good with emotional intimacy. It's a delicate balance.
Of course, there are good guys out there. My guy friends are the best. They just happen to be in the minority. It always makes me wonder... how could there be so many wonderful, beautiful, smart, successful women, but barely any wonderful, handsome, smart, successful men?
I mean, online dating for example. There are a lot of hot babes on there, but hot guys are in the minority. Why's that? Hot women seem to be everywhere, but what about the hot men? Mind-boggling, I think.
Oh crap, I have a date next week with this super boring engineer. I really, really don't know how I got myself into this.
Well, no, I'm lying. I know how. I added him to facebook because he gave me his go ahead to add him. Now that he's on my facebook, I can't just say - "look I'm not interested in meeting up anymore, even though there's a sense of false intimacy that comes from being facebook friends." I can't do it. To make things worse? We actually have a mutual friend, this guy I met a wine event who I have a tiny crush on because he's so good looking. Yeah.
So, I've come to realize that I should never, ever, ever add someone to my facebook before sending at least 4 emails back and forth to get a good grasp of their writing style. I wonder if he ever feels like his writing is so dreadfully DULL? You know like those people who sound like they're writing for school. They're aiming for the best essay based on their ability to vary their sentence lengths. I mean, really, these days you don't get extra points for grammar and spelling. They're the bare minimum.
When you're communicating online, your writing style matters. I scan through his messages, hoping, HOPING for some tiny hint of personality. A tiny hint that there's something mischievous about him. A tiny hint that we might have a good time together. I'm literally pulling my hair every time I read his messages. The banality of his writing drives me absolutely nuts.
I hate to say this, but the reason why I rule out guys under 5'7 is because they either turn out to be 1) low in self-esteem and thus have to compensate through fame / wealth / acting macho 2) low in self-esteem but don't do anything about it thus leading to a boring personality 3) low in self-esteem and try very hard to be liked by being very very nice to people.
As with everything, there are exceptions - ones that I don't mention because I'm trying to make a point. If you remember, the cop was about 5'9, but lied he was 6'0. When you make that big of an exaggeration, that's very, very telling.
I'm not saying this engineer won't turn out to be completely hilarious in person. Sometimes that can happen. People express themselves different online than in person. But I can't get over the fact that I hate his writing.
It goes back to the question - ummm cyn? why are you even dating?
Yes yes, I know. I talked to my ex again (the one I broke up with 6 months ago) for about 10 minutes yesterday. I still haven't recovered from the damage he blessed me with. I think I was right when I said I needed a year to get over the relationship.
PS - Have 5 seconds? Take my hairstyle poll below. And no, I will NOT know how you voted. I also don't have a preference actually, so don't worry about me coming after you and threatening to hurt you if you didn't pick a certain one. Really. Your vote will just give me an idea of what people think I look best in. Since I change my hairstyle quite frequently it'd be interesting to get some feedback from everyone (and about what you like). I'm passing this along to friends too. Whichever one gets the most vote, I might consider going back to. Vote & see how other people have voted :)
Two nights ago, I watched the most positive, inspiring, heart-warming, tear-jerking movie EVER. Meet the Robinsons is about this orphaned kid who has a knack for inventing things, but he fails on first try because his roommate from the future comes to the present to ruin his life. The whole movie's really about the kid overcoming adversity and getting back up after all his failures. You'd have to see for yourself to get what I mean.
I started BAWLING my eyes out in the last 15 mins of the movie. Like tears rolling down my face. The movie ends with a great quote, but I'm not going to ruin it for you. It ties everything beautifully together.
The key message of "keep moving forward" pretty much sums up the entire movie. Whenever you feel that you can't do something, or you feel like giving up, tell yourself to keep moving forward because you never know how close you are to success.
This is a movie that's geared mostly to kids, but I still found it very moving. Some people are immune or unaffected by movies like this, which I find sad. When you can't look deep in yourself to find your inner child, what's left of you? Where's the hope and dreams?
Read about Meet the Robinsons on IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0396555/
Mandy Moore - Only Hope (A Walk to Remember) movie soundtrack
There's a song that's inside of my soul It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again I'm awake in the infinite cold But You sing to me over and over and over again
So I lay my head back down And I lift my hands and pray to be only Yours I pray to be only Yours I know now you're my only hope
Sing to me the song of the stars Of Your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again When it feels like my dreams are so far Sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again
So I lay my head back down And I lift my hands and pray To be only yours I pray to be only yours I know now you're my only hope
I give You my destiny I'm giving You all of me I want Your symphony Singing in all that I am At the top of my lungs I'm giving it back
So I lay my head back down And I lift my hands and pray To be only yours I pray to be only yours I pray to be only yours I know now you're my only hope
