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Praise God from whom all blessings flow/ praise him all creatures here below/ praise him above ye heavenly host/ Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

 

“Don’t it always seem to go that you don’t know what you got til it’s gone”

-         Counting Crows

 

It’s so ironic that the people we are the closest to are the people we often forget about.  And the one’s we miss the most when they’re gone.

 

I’ve been rather homesick this semester; much more so then last.  I miss my informed political discussions with my dad.  I miss hearing about my mom’s bus runs and the crazy things the kids do.  I miss Caleb’s car driving up and down the road.  I miss hearing the punching bag shake the floor because Jacob’s working out for the sixth time today.  I miss going to Starbucks with Adam.  I miss being involved in their lives.

 

I miss hearing my Grandma’s pit bull bark at my dad and knowing that she’s ok.  I called her house today and had to leave a message.  She lives alone, and it scares me to think what would happen in an emergency.  Thankfully, she called right back and we had a lovely chat about her overseas adventures (I love my Gma!!!)

 

I miss going for more Starbucks with Trish.  I miss clipping P and J’s fingernails and taking pictures of Boo.  I miss Heather’s patience.  I miss Liam listening to me read to him for hours.  I miss Eamon and Ronan’s big heads and laughing at their crazy antics.  I even miss my crazy drama-girl Maggie, although I don’t always miss her fits.

 

I miss the office.  I miss the freedom of working to 10pm and even the crazy clients.  I miss my lame coworkers (and the not-so-lame ones too), mostly because I miss cleaning up after them.  I miss going to Court.  I miss working for Bill and Pat, and knowing that I rock at my job.  I miss the feeling that I’m actually accomplishing something in life.

 

I miss my church.  I miss my worship leader (a ton!!).  I miss the security of knowing that I’m in the right place at the right time.  I miss all my extended moms and dads and their wisdom.  And I miss my zillion sisters and bros who I grew up with and the accountability that they bring into my life (mostly at Starbucks).

 

I can’t wait for summer.  And yet…

 

I’ll miss cracking up with Andrew and Danielle.  I’ll miss sitting in a quiet Purcellville house and writing Facebook notes.  I’ll miss Scout and Molly (my pseudo-dogs).

 

I’ll miss Blackberries and Market Street, though not for the coffee.  I’ll miss seeing my classmates working there and the PHC discount.  I’ll miss high-speed internet, and all the towns-people I know because I frequent the coffeehouses.  I’ll miss Magnolia’s (although I can never afford to eat there)

 

I’ll miss girl time, and the crazy conversations we have, both the ones that we publicize and the ones that must NEVER be mentioned outside the wing.  I’ll miss randomly screaming at 10:59 pm, and Bekah coming in and telling us we need to be quiet.  I’ll miss Ducky, and cleaning inspections, and my cube.  I’ll miss Bobtisms and Professors (thought maybe not all of them).  I’ll miss my AWANA kids and I might even miss seeing the three million couples that frequent my dorm.  I’ll miss lunch runs to McDonalds and sharing blush.  I’ll miss giggles at wing chapel and study parties in the hallway.  I’ll miss trying to figure out which razor is mine after Thursday night cleanings and late night runs to party at Giant.  I’ll miss game nights and dances, sleepovers in the lounge and not cleaning my room because I don’t feel like it.  I’ll miss climbing trees in the freezing cold while playing hide-and-seek and having bruises on my knees from crawling through the drainage system.  I’ll miss random weekend shopping trips to Tyson’s, Dulles and Leesburg.  And trying on all my new clothing three times to model them for my wingmates.  I’ll miss shocking Lizzie with the things that I say (love ya, babe!!).  I’ll miss Anna’s drama (and her mess; ok, I’ll miss Anna too!).  I’ll miss Stephy’s… well, how can you not miss Stephy?

 

I’ll miss Beans.  I will miss Beans SSOO much, and the baristas that I love.  I’ll miss Harpers Ferry and Father Kelly’s amazing liturgies.  I’ll miss being able to randomly drive five minutes in any direction and being able to sit in a cemetery and think.  I’ll miss the purple house down business 7, and thinking “who paints their house purple?”

 

Light of the world you stepped down into darkness opened my eyes let me see beauty that made this heart adore you hope of a life spent with you/ So here I am to worship/ Here I am to bow down/ Here I am to say that you’re my God/ You’re altogether lovely/ Altogether worthy/ Altogether wonderful to me.

 

Humbly you came to the earth you created/ All for love’s sake became poor/ And I’ll never know how much it cost to see my sin upon that cross

 

Contentment.  It’s so easy to be happy with the material things we have.  I’m happy with my car, my computer, my camera, my cell phone, my clothes, my shoes, and my iPod.  Yes, a lot of my technology’s old, but it all works, which makes me happy.  I wrote my mom a long email in the middle of last semester about how God had been teaching me contentment with material items.  Now, I think we’ve moved on to bigger and better things.

 

College, for me, is such a unique experience.  Nine months a year, I’m learning things, and the other three months, I get to relive my senior year of high school.  Then I get to go repeat the nine months.  I know that as much as I miss things during the nine months, I’ll get to see them for the other three.  I know that all the stuff I’m not happy about now will change in two months, so why bother with trying to act rightly toward them?

 

Contentment is not purely about the material things, though that is part of it.  Contentment is living each day for Christ.  More importantly, it’s living each day knowing that no matter the situation, whether you want to be there or not, he wants you there, and being ok with it, because he wants you there.

 

I’ve realized I’m not content.  I hate where I am.  I think God messed up with the people he placed in my life, the school he sent me to, the authority he’s placed over me.  I yearn for summer to come, counting down the days, the hours, the minutes, the seconds.  It’s so ironic that six months ago, I was SO ready to move on campus.  Now, I’m so ready to move off.  And I know that, come August, I’ll be ready to move back to P-ville, grab a Caramel Marketchino and gtalk for a while.

 

I am such a weak vessel.  I can’t stand four months in a pressure cooker, when my savior withstood every single solitary one of my sins while hanging on a cross.  Yet I arrogantly approach him and inform him that big, important me isn’t happy with his guide in my life, and yes, thank you very much, I could do such a better job.  At least, if I were in charge, I would be happy.  I could do whatever I want, when I want, with no discretion.

 

Thankfully, I’m not in charge.  If I were in charge, I would probably be finding happiness at the bottom of a bottle, in the arms of a man, or in my own abilities.  Apart from God, I would not be seeking him.  Yet so many days, I’m not happy because I’m not in charge.  I willingly signed up for him to be captain, yet I constantly disregard his authority and his leadership.  Sometimes, I actually wish he would strike me dead with lightening, just to prove to me once and for all that he’s in control.  I think “surely that much electricity would get my attention and grasp it forever.”  Yet, I know that, were I to miraculously live, I would still forget.  I would wish for another day, another time, past or future, it wouldn’t matter.

 

Horatio Spafford’s song It Is Well should be my mantra.  It is well with my soul.  That professor I can’t stand is well.  My work load is well.  The two years of college I still have is well.  And even the three after that.  And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be site!  But as long as it is not that day, let it be well with my soul.

 

See from his head, his hands, his feet/ Sorrow and love flow mingled down/ Did ere such love, and sorrow meet?/ Or thorns compose so rich a crown?/ Oh the wonderful cross/ Oh the wonderful cross/ Bids me come and die/ And find that I may truly live/ Oh the wonderful cross/ Oh the wonderful cross/ All who gather here/ By grace draw near and bless your name.

 

Were the whole realm of nature mine/ that were an offering far too small/ Love so amazing, so divine/ Demands my soul, my life, my all.

Wow.  It's been like a month since I posted!  Amazing...  Time sure does fly when you're having fun.. or when you have a whole bunch of stuff to do and not enough time to do it in.

Itemized list of things done:

Mary Kay:  have been working on getting my business started up.  Crazy!  And, if there's anybody out there that wants a free facial, I NEED your face!  I have thirty facials to do (well technically 27) in 20 days.  AHH!!  I'm not sure if it's going to happen, but I'm sure going to try!!

Work (Office): had our Christmas party last week (oh.. that's right... there was this little holiday called Christmas that happened yesturday!!).  It was pretty fun.  P & J were there and they were pretty good.  And baby was there too but she slept the whole time (which probably isn't a bad thing!)  Other than that, not much going on.  I got a $200 Christmas bonus (which is good since I'm only about $3,000 dollars in debt this month!!)  Oh well.  Such is life.

Work (babysitting): crazy!  My boss had some friends over the other day and I got ALL 6 of the kids including an infant and a clingy 12 month old, plus his annoying 5 year old brother.  But, again, such is life.  I'm finding that I'm WAY more patient with ppl in general now.  However, I also find that I'm using smaller words to instruct ppl.  Probably not a bad thing bcs ppl understand me better.

Free time:  that stuff exists anymore??

Christmas:  It was pretty cool.  Went over to my friend Xza-Xza's house.  Actually, lets back up.  My friend Anna and I went to Midnight Mass at St. Ignatius Church.  We got back to my place at like 2 A.M. and she spent the night.  The next morning we were up at the crack of dawn bcs we had to be at church early to put on a Christmas play for the 2 to 6 year olds.  I was a Narrator along with Xza-Xza and we had a BLAST!!  Then we (minus Anna, THANKFULLY!!) went back to her house to have Christmas dinner (steak and shrimp among other side dishes, plus LOTS of chocolate!).  Then we went up to her parents room and "watched" the Princess Bride.  By "watched", I mean that we fell asleep for all of 15 minutes and missed the best part of the movie, which is the Miracle Max part!  AHH!!  The rest of the night consisted of watching VH1, among other things and pretty much just channel surfing.  Then she came back to my house and we chilled.  By chilled I mean we went to sleep bcs by now it was 11 P.M. and I was tired!

Today, I facialed her (while dealing with my mother who was driving me crazy with her mean, unkind, non-building up remarks refering to my occupation!!) then we called Anna and said we were going to see Harry Potter at 11:50.  And that blood was sensed by the viscous sharks immediately.  Instantly my brother were all coming.  Then JJ, Missy and Anna's little sister Aimee.  We would've had her little brother Daniel too, but I didn't have enough seats in my car!!  So the 9 of us trucked to the movie theater and watched Harry Potter (which is really, really good, for anyone who was wondering.)(Professor Snape is SSOO hot!!)...  And then we got rid of Anna again and went to lunch with my friend Natt and her mom and my mom..  And then that's about it.

Well, my room is an UTTER disaster.  So must go clean it before my mom does something mean and unkind to me...

Love ya,
Sarah