| | It's Been the Best of Times, It's Been the Worst of Times Seriously. Life's funny in that way, isn't it?
The Worst of Times:
I believe I'm seriously beginning to find today's society an abhorrent little bugger. I mean seriously, if it were a tangible object rather than an overall concept, I am firmly convinced I would regurgitate all over it. I would have eaten pickles and beefaroni the night before as well. It would be quite gross. I speak, my friends, of the travesties of the pursuit of progress simply for the sake of progress and/or the capitalist dollar, or in more blunt (and at least relative to me) terms, the travesties of education. Now, I know I whine continuously. But for the first month or so of this semester, my non-academic life has been nonexistent (...much like the last one). To the point of being unhealthily so. My eating habits are horrible, I haven't been able to work out, my time for reflection was shot through a bleak and black void. But this is the norm, you say? Oh no. I actually payed attention to specifics so arguments might not go thusly. For literally 1.5-2 weeks (this is a minimum period of which I may truthfully claim, with 100% no exaggeration), I have had NO, read me, NO free time at all, sparing 30 minutes for meals, and sometimes not even that. This is also with staying up to at least 12:00am (or mostly 3:00am) every night. Maybe that is the norm, I don't know, but that is unhealthy. The worst example? 9:00am-3:00am the next morning, straight, working. And this is with me not procrastinating. All in the name of job competition and advancing technology. Blah. Puke, pukity, puke, barf.
And can you imagine the stress, and therefore how dramatic everything seems, during such a time? I actually managed to eat with my parents during one night (sad, ain't it?). During which, I was so stressed from the work overload that I was shaking and singing to the biscuits I was eating. Were I to have began running frantic circles in the middle of the restaurant while wearing various steaks and soup bowls on my head, I would have thought it to be the best, and assured my parents of the same as well. It sounds so trite, but sheesh, what that does to the mind. I would have given all my unnecessary organs to be back in the day when the total number of wheels in the world could be counted on one hand, was an odd number, and the closest thing to electricity was playing lightning bolt tag... The simple things like free time--oh how we need them. The worst of times side of things may seem silly, but believe me, it caused a hellish time period. The Best of Times: But I speak of the best of times afterwards. Why? OH SWEET FAINT HOPE OF OPTIMISM PLEASE BE THE LAST THING ON MY MIND!!! AHHHHH!! And I hate using all caps. Nonetheless, there truly has been a spring of joy within such times. And luckily it exists within the overall, the eventual outcome, what's important. I can look at my life now and have one of those "Dang....that's nice" moments. Quite stunning indeed. Oh let's do talk about the good stuff, shall we? Yes, yes, I like to hear about what's good. Oh my freaking goodness, I have the most wonderful person as companion and friend ever! And did I mention she's my girlfriend to? In times of trial, it helps, if is not necessary, to have that leaning shoulder. Luckily for me, that leaning shoulder take the form of Natalie, one of the kindest hearts, brightest souls, and most comically amusing and enjoyable persons to be around. Period. Lucky to have her? Oh, an understatement indeed. I have two nice jobs pretty much lined up for me in the future, already! Two! Heck yes! For the summer work force, I get to once again work at my old highschool. That may not strike as much, but if I have any old entries on the work there...um, well. I'm just glad it's still classified as work. And it pays well too! For next year's school year, I've already gone through the interviewing process and am accepted for the position of Residential Assistant (RA) on one of the on-campus dorms. That means I'm one of the go-to guys on the dorms. I also work the office and front desk and occasional organize various manners of creative festivities. It's a fun job. They basically pay me to be a people person. Awesome. The pay comes more in perks, but one big one is that the cost of living on campus is entirely removed....which is a pretty good amount of mooh-lah. My future, permanent career...well, I've already got a head start on it. At the moment, I want to be a structural biologist. That means I screw around with proteins, genetics, and the like, hopefully in an attempt to cure diseases. More than likely, this means I'll be working in a research lab. Well, guess what? I already am! I'm in a structural biology lab group right now! Crazy, huh? It was basically me being blessed enough to be in the right program. Lucky opportunities. But the implications of this to my future career, insofar as attaining it and working efficiently in it, are pretty dern cool. Now, I'm not actually doing work right now...more just tagging along, learning, and doing grunt things; however, when I'm comfortable enough with it all, I get my own project. It's cool stuff to. As a base overview, without getting all to high-techy, shut-me-up-with-duct-tape-ish, we insert DNA into E-coli cells which causes them to make specific proteins we want. Then we take those proteins, stick them into these two cool machines, and are able to tell what the protein looks like and how it interacts. Oh, and the key factor, many diseases (it seems like pretty much all of them to me now...meh) are caused by protein issues. We fix the protein problem, we cure the disease. And I'm "working" on that right now! Oh my. So overall... it appears everything is pretty much just laid out for me. The future is wide-open for opportunities; it's looking good. Perhaps, this is more so the best of times after all. And Now: I'm kind of in one of those bumps where things have settled. I actually played video games tonight. I actually had time to go to church tonight. I actually had free time. Dear Lord, I used that word? Thank you God! My mind is much more at ease. Self-reflection gradually eases back (though I'm sure it won't yield happy results after such a time). The homework certainly still exists, but it seems to have backed off some. One particular example being that Natalie and I talked to the teacher who resided over the class in which I worked from 9am-3am on. He apologized, bought the class doughnuts the next day, offered us tons of extra credit, moved our assignment due date back, and gave us no homework. This was our worst class...so things have certainly changed a little. Though I'm terrified of how long it will last. I sometimes wonder if I can withstand it getting that bad again, but I believe so. That's life for you. I'm sure I'll be swamped soon enough. Until then, there's joy and mirth and healing. Oh yeah, buddy! So all such is why I haven't written in so long. I've been undeniably busy. And yet, all that I've done is thus summarized within the above lines.
I hope to write more soon. There are things I want to get out. Good things. Learned things.
My typical all-too-sappy-and-probably-ridiculous-romanticism crap.
Hey, I'm honest with myself. Good to be back on here, if even for a bit. I hope all who read this are doing well. |
