Something worth fighting for is something that often requires our sweat, blood, tears and pain.

at least that's what I keep telling myself...

Do what you love. Love what you do!!

It's such a challenge to choose to enjoy life just as it is, with all the daily stresses and trials.  I find that medical school presents a myriad of challenges for me.  From the daily grind of attending classes and puting my mind to learning material that is rather dry and carries little imagination or interest, to how deeply I miss my family.

I wonder if I'll make it through to the other side (when people will shockingly refer to me as Doctor.  I think I will look around wondering who they mean). 

I wonder if I'll enjoy being a physician.  All this work - what will I do if it doesn't get better?  What if I don't eventually like it more?  What then?  I won't really have a choice, with over $150,000 in debt (and between the fiance' and me, probaby a heck of a lot more than that!)...  I will have to work, even if I'm not crazy about what I'm doing.

At this point it's rather a challenge of CHOOSING to love whatever I end up doing.  This is my path.  This is the way God sent me.  I don't really understand why, because I pretty much daily feel inadequate to face the situation I'm in....  I feel that I've reached the end of what I can take, and I'm kind of hopping around trying to get God's attention, 
"HEY!!  Remember me!!!!!  No more!  I can't do anymore!!!!!  Please don't forget about me, God..."

And actually, it all boils down to wanting to go home.  I want to see my mom and dad.  I want a hug from every family member.  I want us to sit down and eat dinner together.  Not just on Winter break or Spring break, but every day.  I never realized that I was such a home-body, and that being away from my family would be this excruciating.  I guess it boils down to me being a big baby...  A 24-year old child.  I want my mommy!  NOW.  :(