december 11, 2007
Ma, dui bu qi.
I'm going away soon, you know. And now, it almost feels like it's too late to say the important things. Thank you. I love you. I'm sorry.
But at the same time, I'll never forget them - the nights you stayed up with me because I was sick, the time and love you've put into raising me, the sacrifices you've made to get our family through everything, the times you actually said the right thing and understood, and especially the lifelong habits and lessons you've passed on to me. Thank you, for never giving up on me.
Growing up, you put so much pressure on me. And now, I understand that it was just because you loved me, and you did it because you knew that your expectations would serve me in the long-run. Everything you've done for me, I recognize, though there may be even more hidden acts of love that I've overlooked. The tears I've shed and embarrassments you've forced me through seem so petty now - paying for myself in a grocery store, using coupons, rejecting telemarketers - by overcoming them, you've made me stronger and more mature. Until this year, I don't think I ever told you, but I love you, very very much.
And though I know and see and feel your love, it's simply not the Chinese way to apologize. So for all the times we've fought - and it was really my fault (of which, I admit there have been thousands) - I don't recall every really apologizing. It felt too awkward to make up, to actually forgive, and so much easier to just forget. I know though, that we've never quite forgotten those times. And so, I'm sorry that I couldn't always be the daughter you wanted me to be. I'm sorry I'm never around and I haven't ever really been around for you. I'm sorry I haven't given enough back to really thank you. I'm sorry for everything.
Am I not Chinese? Do I not look Chinese? But do I not speak English? Am I not American?
Growing up, and even now, I've struggled to find my identity. I've always thought you hindered me in my search, but now I see what you've done, mistakes and all, and I respect you for it.
I am the interface between a polar and nonpolar solution - the rich culture of China and the rich opportunities of America. We have deemed this interfacial position, A-B-C.