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| Quote of the Day - "If trust is what you fought about again and again, why is there a relationship?" (Mamoyo, 2006)
This was my very first post on this xanga space of mine, minus the capital letters, the paragraphing and proper structuring of sentences.
I was excited at the prospect of writing on cyberspace, amused that strangers would be reading my thoughts and encouraged by the idea of critique - a space for me to learn.
Then I was slightly chirpy, my tone a lil' English and my writing incoherently whiny.
I realised I was already loud-minded here when I wrote that abstinence before marriage is weird for me.
June 29, 2004"hello people. what they say about first impression is so right.
which explains why i took a bloody 10 minutes thinking of what to write
in my first post in my first blog. i am thinking that i am becoming
much of an attention seeker. now, that's quite a morbid thought, isn't
it? why on earth will a person with too much loving friends and so
little time on her hands still sign up to write in a blog? enlighten
please on my own dilemma. =D. can i stop writing now? i feel like i'm
forced to do a presentation where i am required to talk and talk and
talk. however, since i'll be talking about my favourite subject - ME,
i'm beginning to have an alright feeling about this whole revealing my
inner feelings to the world who probably doesn't even care if i fail a
test or break a nail - not that i have a nail to break since i have the
world's most annoying habit which is to bite my nails. i have all sorts
of beliefs. i believe that God must be a man because some women have
tits for brains and men are such natural dickweeds. i think believing
that God doesn't want us to have sex before marriage is just too plain
weird. what confuses me even more is that people who claim they are in
a religion and yet commits 'sins' against the teachings of their
religions. care to explain why bother? i'm missing tequila, calvin and
dian right now. mmm muahs"
I started becoming more playful and more provocative in my writings.
Quite understandable as I am so in real life. Quite often when you're cynical, you're likely to be sarcastic as well. And my penchant for sarcasm is incorporated in most of my writings.
If you miss it, you need to get a sense of humour.
If you spot it and find it offensive, I suggest you loosen up a little.
You know what they say?
Make fun of the taboo
and you're less likely to have a small penis!
Here, my frankness about my sexual life came out in the open.
I saw no harm, only honesty.
So I brought my sex life out of the bedroom and onto xanga, believing no shame in writing what you all may or may not have experienced.
I saw only being myself on this web journal.
February 1, 2005
Phone Sex
Distance makes the heart fonder. In my case, it made both me and Eric terribly horny.
So we tried phone sex.
We were warming to the idea that he's gonna go down on me.
Mamoyo: Mmm... how about you reach up with both your hands to hold my breasts while licking me?
Eric: Huh. I'm gonna look like superman doing that!
M: Oh.
E: How about I hold your breast with just one hand, honey?
M: You're gonna look like Ultraman!!!
...
And who can forget the fake orgasm video that propelled me to celebrity blogger status?
Literacy in sarcasm is a must before watching the video.
Simply put, it is a parody of When Harry Met Sally... you know, when Sally faked an orgasm in the restaurant.
I am not moaning for you, I am showing you how easy it is to fake an orgasm.
Your girlfriend can be faking it right this moment because you were too stupid to spot the off pitched groans in my video.
Here's a tip - her clit is most likely to be very swollen when she's nearing orgasm and after the orgasm, the clit should be as flat as a roti canai.
This can be true or not true, depending on individual.
I know, I might have as well said nothing.
In this blog alone, I've cried foul at cheating partners and survived
physical abuse.
I've found my dad after six years of separation.
Few
months later, I wrote that I moved out from an ex's house after nearly
two years of reliance, of whom his parents I have grown very fond of.
I've complained incessantly about Curtin, the university in which I am
still schooled at.
I've rhapsodized superficially about my body insecurities albeit very real and very scary.
Many personal insights about relationships followed post after post.
I counted a few relationships and breakups in this blog alone.
As I read back, I sounded almost pathetically heartbroken but even if given the opportunity to turn back time, I wouldn't phrase my emotions any differently.
As cynical as I may be, when heartbroken, I hurt just as much as the next girl.
Somehow quite reassuringly it now is to me, for the moments that I was pathetic, I know now that I did treasure my relationships, despite the ways they were broken and the resentment that came afterwards.
I posted pictures of my life and of myself.
Many of them are to share with my friends and you, the happy moments in my life, some sad.
Here's a part of me still framed in a 640x480.
Some of the pictures are for narcissistic reasons, for a quick self-esteem boost or sometimes, to remind myself just how fortunate I am - emotionally, physically and materialistically.
I wrote about my friends, about how I had close to none in secondary school and now I am blessed with best friends.
Whom not only understand me, accept me and love me but also be there for me.
In the two years I've blogged, I've lost friends and gained precious ones, all pensively inscribed here with minimal efforts of keyboard tapping but each word with immense feelings.
Oh and sex... how can I forget the one thing that most of you come to this blog for?
I have very little to say about this subject, only this; I do not need to be
white or black, Asian or American, man or woman, married or
divorced, highly educated or illiterate, your gynaecologist or your parents, adult or menopaused to
have/write about/talk about sex.
I just need to be myself.
And lastly,
That would be my last quote.
For this blog.
I'm closing this down.
To the faithful readers, I really want to thank you for being so supportive of me.
Thank you so much.
But I realised after two years of blogging under Mamoyo, I'm finally tired.
Blogging here has become too frustrating for me.
What used to be my source of outlet has now become a reason for more aggravations.
Not so much the personal attacks and criticisms of my blatant honesty.
I used to write as a means of liberation and yet with every entry I get judged as a character, not as a writer.
I wonder who did you all fell in love with - mamoyo or me?
I'll be moving to a new domain.
And it won't be mamoyo.
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| My brother was in a car accident.
Burnt his Honda City and another car into useless metal scraps.
At the Pujut bridge.
I've never felt so much fear when I saw the scene.
Fire trucks and police cars.
People. So many people. Too many people.
But I didn't see my brother.
I was going where's my brother? where's my brother?
Until someone stepped up and said he's been brought to the hospital.
I've never felt so much fear.
He's been released from the hospital this morning with minor scratches.
And confirmation of no internal injuries as initially suspected.
I'm thankful he's safe.
I'm thankful he's alive.
But the family he rammed into wasn't so happy.
One whole fucking mob of them at the hospital last night.
Angry and unsatisfied at my brother.
Threats have been made. Money has been exchanged.
In extreme financial crisis.
I'm hoping for a miracle.
For a time machine.
For this to be over.
For him to learn his lesson.
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| Quote of the Day - "Urgh! Penises are so not photogenic!" (Mamoyo, 2006)
My Dog Needs To Get Laid Part II
... cause' I have nothing else to blog about.
If I write about sex, I have no shame. Are you all sexual anorexics or what?
Nothing to write about also. I haven't been getting any action.
If I write about myself, I am so full of myself. A lil' self-confidence will kill you, is it?
Fine. I'll blog about my superdog.
I swear I'm his fucking slave.
So my neighbour's dog and Darlink have been talking...
Now that damn dog barks at everything!
I've always been careful about him not watching violent movies.
Like Courage The Cowardly Dog or Family Guy.
Just in case Darlink picks up smoking or blonde chicks.
But blur old me forgot the biggest influence of all... peer pressure!
Now he lihai... feels like he has to prove his friend something!
See newspaper man bark! See my friends bark! See small kid cycling past bark! See other dogs bark! See my neighbour bark! See my neighbour's dog bark!
See me bark!
...
No yet eat rotan this fellow!
So I brought him out for a walk.
Translation: I went running after him as he went on a rampage of pissing competition.
I know he's territorial... I mean, I can understand that what with him being a man and all.
But goddamnit, there's a time and place for everything!
He pissed on everyfuckingthing.
The bunga tahi ayam at my neighbour's place.
One AhBeng's Kenari (serves him right!).
Squatted a while at a patch of grass and wanted to shit but halfway the shit coming out of his ass, he changed his mind and ran to another patch (all the while, the shit still halfway out of his rectum and me being jerked around by a dog on a leash).
And worst of all...
... on a motorbike with a guy on it!
Omfg!
I've never been so embarrassed in my entire life.
The guy just looked on half-horrified, half-amused while Darlink did his business.
All the while I was putting my hand to my forehead in salutes of apologies... again and again.
Cibai dog.
I cut off your penis then you know... then you will never pee again!
Speaking of circumcision albeit a lil' too extreme, Irene asked me to castrate my dog.
o_0
So cruel suggest I get Darlink's balls snipped.
How he hold his head up like this?!
No balls not a man, you know.
Already kan peer pressure... now no balls...
What if he's laughed out of the clique and become social outcast?
I want generations of dogs from this superdog okay.
Continue my family's name.
The Yong Family.
But yes, after reading up on some dog breeding articles, I've decided to get him castrated.
Say byebye to your balls, Darlink!
What matters is the inside, you know...
*cheat small kids wan this consolation*
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| Quote of the Day - "It's only
when the man starts being a bastard, then the woman realises he can be more
than just a friend" (Mamoyo, 2006)
Okay
I miss blogging. So I shall, without the damn Sony T30.
So...
My dog needs to get laid.
Quick.
His special bolster is getting weary.
He would have lost his virginity last night if my friend, who shall remain anonymous would just let her dog have some fun.
My dog wanted it. Her dog wanted it. It would have been consensual sex.
I was all for it! Afterall this could possibly be the only chance I would get to be a parent!
I can understand a bit since her dog is still underage. But there's a lot of underage sex going on!
Yes right under your noses, you blissfully unaware parents!
Doesn't mean it's right but damn... they're dogs! Let them have a go at it!
But my friend is very protective of her dog!
She wants her to be a virgin forever.
For-everrr.
!!!
Oh my god. The cruelty.
Scary wei...
Later your dog grow up to hate you.
Rebel against you.
Then go fuck behind your back.
Run away from home.
Then come back with 5 puppies.
Since cannot fuck... they played with each other.
But Darlink still main paksa.
Tried to go up on her dog but at the wrong end!
Holyshit!
That was an attempted rape went wrong.
Became blowjob.
See! Even the dogs got it right...
foreplay first.
But alas, both dogs were pulled away before third base.
Cannot force right... I tried to matchmake Darlink but failed.
This is my only chance of becoming a parent but failed.
Tiew...
I can really see it now...
Me an old maid with a 40 year old virgin dog!
Sob.
P.s. name protected to ensure her dog a good marital reputation
| | |
| ... wei wei wei ...
I am uh angry.
... how can... no boobs... no penis to show also... why the hell...
... Beh song
I.am.in.fourth.place.now.in.the.camwhore.competition.
Losing to guys!
4 guys somemore.
Yes I am erm angry.
No quotes. No entries. No pictures.
... until I win.
 
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