"

I have come here to complain about my surroundings, and naively croon about the beauty of life, even as I cry over the poison. Pressure you into doing drugs, encourage underage sex, and finally push upon you my unnatural love for smoking corpses. I’ll admit to fantasizing about the threesome with the perfectly crazy combination of Russell Brand and the random lad that delivers the milk, and reveal to you my wish to have a Freaky Friday incident with Jennifer Pugh- minus “The Teeth”, then to share a fag with Irina Lazareanu. And all the while I’ll welcome you with my arcane smile. Taking your hand with my vomit-inducing fingers, kissing you with my chapped lips, and politely offer you a swig from my vodka. I’ll whisper to you, under my smoky breath, much exaggerated romantic tales and send you to bed; laxatives in your hand, head spinning with pale dancing fairies, skeletons and the want to speak with me again.

You’ll wish you never stopped by. "

--Here's to the me that none of you know nor will ever understand.