wow.

xanga...this still exists.

its quite interesting...ive had this xanga for 1021 days..a very long time..but I seem to have abandonded it...like a lot of other things in my life. Last time i posted something here..was about 2-4 years ago. Pretty much what happend in that time period is that i grew up. I just read all my past posts...& cant help thinking about how differently things have turned out from the way I expected. In some ways, I feel like ive missed out on a lot of memories & good times that i could have had. But in many other ways, I am grateful for the direction in which my life is heading.

Moving to old bridge gave me a clean slate, a completely new life. At first I regreted leaving everything that was so fammiliar to me in my life...it was like I was stripped of my safety blanket & throw into the wild (lol..weird way to describe it!) but its true...i couldn't help my feeling of helplessness/lonliness..it was a feeling that took a lot of time to shake off..but I eventally did. Now when I think about it im extremely lucky to have left when I did. I mean who really gets the chance to hide all their past mistakes & image behind and start high school with people who cant critisize becaiuse they know nothing about you. I get quite nostalgic when my friends talk about growing up together, but thats okay too. I mean it sometimes bothers me that they werent there for all my crazy/silly times, but that feeling passes more quickly everytime i get it.

Because i realize that ive been making memories for the past two years with these people..even though it doesnt seem like a lot of time...i think ive made some closer friends here than ive had in my thirteen years in jersey city.

I think growing up is tough. I remember when i used to be asked  what i wanted to be when i wanted to grow up all the time & i always thought that i had plenty of time to figure it out. but now i realize, that time is running out. I mean im a senior now...& how much more time do i really have to make up my mind? Eventually...ill be grownup & that question wont apply to me at all...grr..that tends to scare me

I want to thank Amir at this point. I think he had a lot to contribute to everything pretty much. After spending 20 months with him..i feel as if he's an experience that ill always remember..and one that had a pretty significant impact on my character. I cant explain how or why, but he did. I guess anyone that a person is intimate with for such a long time changes them...not really changes, but impacts that person.

Well..that was a pretty long post..but yea...like ive said...its been a long time as well

I think i still like xanga.

<3 Dashy

***sidenote: HP party tonight!..lol*** XD

everyhting is goingg sooo well here..friends ,klass...all that krap...but i still dont like it...its bin friggin 3 months...nd i still think this place is shit nd ill b bak in jc sooon.....theyree sooo much drama herend not the type i like to be apart of but still somehoww get involvedd in,./...stupid sophmores...id rather b a freashmman......theyre all soo old...  nd i justt wish everything was gonnee, nd i were bakk homeeee.....i guess everyone has bin moved on, the only person i keep in kontact w/ is mik, but thats like barellyy....i hav alll the time in the world, but i just cant call them, i guess its all soo different now. Nd what suksss is that i wont be w/ sam for our 6 MONTH, which is tommorow........so i juss guesss im so pissed kuz im overloaded w/ krap..o yea...happy diwaliii

                                                            meeta

i like 2 say again 2 all of u ppl : buss incident w/ my skarf was totally nott funni  (ahemm...ahem..henal)  and also to those who keep reminding meeh about it