Well, my two year itch has hit.  I'm moving again but this time to start school again.  I've been accepted to Duke Divinity School in Durham, NC to begin the Master of Divinity program.  I have somehow convinced my friend Amy to move to Durham with me.  Amy has spent the last two years working as a Resident Director at McPherson College.  We became friends through my excellent stalker skills.  Thank you internet.  If you haven't heard that story, it is a good one.  Ask me, I will tell it to you.  I don't know if people still read these things but Xanga said they were going to delete me if I didn't blog again.  So here is my update!!

Writing has never been my strong point.  My sister has always encouraged me to write for as long as I can remember.  She suggested that I journal everyday and use that as an outlet of prayer but I could never get into it.  I would forget or I would write it like someone was looking over my shoulder.  I had the fear that someone would someday read it and it had to be worthwhile if they did or else it would be thrown aside.  I think I have a fear of not being important.  I'm the youngest of three girls.  I often felt forgotten growing up for one reason or another.  It is hard to live in the shadow of two older sisters so I tried to make myself known.  My personality flourished into the now, sometimes overbearing, sometimes funny, thing that it is.  But back to the writing, I never really did get into journaling so I don't write that often.  This really hasn't been a problem in my life until now when I need to write things that sound a certain way or say a certain thing and I don't know how!  I'm applying for grad school and it stresses me out trying to write the small essays that are required.  I have approximately a week to finish them and turn them in.  Not a whole lot of time.  Everything will work out whether or not I get in so I don't know why I'm so stressed about it.  I'm going to let it go.

Can you stay for awhile?  I wish this were the case.  This weekend I went to see my sisters in San Diego, CA and got to feel my little neice moving around in my sister's belly.  Life and creation are so amazing.  How can a little baby be made out of a little egg?  The baby will take breaths in utero but not for the purpose of recieving oxygen because they receive their oxygen through the placenta but they take breaths in order to practice for life outside the safety of the belly.  Can you imagine what that first breath must feel like!  To have your lungs fill with air for the first time instead of a warm liquid that it has known for the past 9 months.  That is why they are so shocked I would assume.  Sometimes I wish I could go back to that time and take that first breath again.  I like to be shocked sometimes.  I like that unfamiliar feeling of insecurity and the unknown.  But just like an infant, you get used to it.  It isn't that shocking anymore.  It doesn't bring you discomfort.



I love my family.  My middle sister has always been the one that was different.  I don't know why that was the case but as we grew older, Melissa and I became more and more alike and Marci went her own way.  I completely understand that siblings are going to be different.  Mel and I are not identical in the way that we do things and the ways that we think but we do look at life in similar ways and have had similar situations and experiences.  Marci never really wanted to be a part of family life.  She was always the one that would grumble at forced family fun time and was never a real active participant.  But when she moved to California something changed in her.  I must say that I am thankful for it.  She started calling more often and wanting to talk about things that she wouldn't even broach before.  This weekend was really great to spend time with her.  I hadn't spent time with her since she moved to Cali a year and a half ago and was really looking forward to seeing her again.  She actually wanted to spend time with me.  She was open about different things that are going on in her life which she never did before.

(I don't know what happened to the top of my head.  One of the disadvantages of being tall!  PS. I'm dressed up as a 9month pregnant woman!)

I'm excited about what the future holds for our family now. I love my family.



Next entry will be about the wonderful man I met on the plane that challenged me and caused me to articulate many of the things that I have never been able to before.