| im not gonna lie, that was ugly...my life is the perfect embodiment of awkwardness... let me bring this statement full circle for you. last sunday evening i experienced something that many of you, no doubt, have experienced before - awkardness. however, this was not your standard, run of the mill awkwardness. this was the "top banana", if you will, of awkwardness (note: i only chose to use this phrase "top banana" because it was used in a conversation with me recently and,well, it was fascinating that someone actually said "top banana"). anyway, back to the story. i was at church sunday evening when a 40-something year old man approached me. i recognized him because he was in the bookstore that i work at earlier that day. the reason that i remembered him was because he was with a woman that was incredibly rude to me. he then proceeded to ask me if i was irritated with that woman. i found this to be rather uncomfortable because as the manager of the store i am expected to be an example and to remain patient with the customers, but the truth is i was definitely bothered. anyway, as i was forcing myself to be friendly in this already uncomfortable situation a friend of mine walked up and gave me a hug. the man then began to walk away. i should have let him go, but i didnt want to be rude so i told my friend that i would catch up with her later. at that moment he then began to walk toward me again, but with one arm fully extended, as if to wrap up the conversation and to give me a hug. naturally, i went in for the hug. although i didnt want to hug the man, i couldnt deny someone a hug and be so blatantly rude. and then it happened. cue the mother of all awkward moments. im sure that many of you have figured out what happened next, but for those of you that arent aware, i wont keep you in suspense any longer. indeed, this man was NOT going to hug me, but rather his intention was to lean against the wall. now, i want you all to have a visual of this (mind you, this man is a perfect stranger): the man walking toward me with his arm extended, me going in to hug him and then moving back and forth thinking, "oh he's going to hug me. oh maybe not. wait, he is, dont be rude hug him. oh no! he's not. awww shoot, this is awkward! ehh, weird things happening inside." thats not the end of it, it actually gets worse. most people, if put in this situation, would continue on in the conversation pretending that that didnt just happen, but that is not how it went. this man actually asked me, "what are you doing?!" i frantically tried to explain that i thought that he was going to give me a hug and i repeatedly said, "wow, this is awkward. i apologize." that is when the "look of pity" slapped me across the face and for the first time in my life i actually had the ability to read someone's mind. his thought was, "that poor, weird girl. how embarrassing." let me tell you, it was rough. not one of my proudest moments, but well worth it because i am still laughing hysterically. and that is the end of my story. |
