| urbana in a nutshell: For the past month or so leading up to Urbana, I had begun to feel a passion in my heart to teach overseas. I think that I felt like I need a direction or some sign from God that I was heading towards the right path. It didn’t help that summer plans were quickly approaching my way, and I had no idea how to spend it; whether it was going back to Kenya, summer school, family trips, etc. I felt like I was being pulled in all directions, and spring semester hadn’t even started yet! So I headed off to St. Louis with a prayer that my mind would be opened, and that God, in his powerful way would speak to me. I ended up setting aside a whole afternoon specifically for the exhibits that were provided having countless conversations with organizations that were so passionate about the work that they were doing. After talking to a specific organization with one of the directors, I felt so encouraged and even a bit hopeful that I was heading towards the right direction of where God wanted me to be. After that conversation, I felt a sense of boldness when I talked to any of the organizations that I was interested in. I told them I was interested in long term missions (meaning at least a year or more), and that I was interested in teaching overseas. However, that night after leaving the exhibits, and having time to rethink and absorb all that went on that afternoon, I became really scared and I wondered what on earth had possessed me to be that bold, and to have seriously even considered being overseas. The more I thought about my bold afternoon, the more scared I became. I think I even began to doubt the passion that was laid upon my heart. That night, I even shared with my family group the thoughts that were going through my head. However, even with all the advice and prayers they offered me, it didn’t calm anything. I went to bed that night with so many thoughts in my head, and in the morning decided to do quiet times instead of attending bible study. While praying and journaling, I told God that I knew what I wanted to do, but asked Him again, what He wanted me to do. I ended up asking God to show me His answer in such a way that I wouldn’t have been able to deny Him. After my quiet time, I felt peace in knowing that my path has already been laid out, and I have to trust God with the desires He has placed in my heart, and to not doubt. That very afternoon, there was this particular seminar about public school teachers that really caught my eye. However, by the time I got there, the seminar was so jam packed that they made people leave because they said that it was a fire hazard. I ended up wandering into this seminar that was titled “Academic and Missions: Doing Both Well.” I had walked in 30-45 minutes late, but I ended walking into the part where the speaker talked about overseas missions, and how teaching was intertwined, and how being a good teach would be able to touch students more than you could possibly imagine. I left that seminar with a good feeling that in the tiniest way, God showed me that He was still in control, and that all I had to do was trust. After having time this week to process my thoughts out loud and on paper, I have realized that God has granted exactly what I had prayed for before we left for Urbana; that this, was the clarity that I had asked for. Summer plan worrying has ceased, and in its place, peace has taken over. God is still powerful, and step by step I know that He will continue to reveal His glorious plan for my life! twas a good experience. pictures? pictures of my lovely roomies maybe? oh, and the pictures are courtsey of kelley lou! thanks for sticking it out with me the entire trip! y'all were a blessing to have around! <3 okay, maybe no more xanga for a long time..so enjoy this post while you can! school will be here before you know it. =( byee kiddos! |
