I remember saying these words one night almost two years ago. I had somehow found myself in a conversation with two or three of my Christian brothers and sisters who were deeper in their faith than I, and I didn't understand or know what to make of what they were saying. So I held my tongue, listening and waiting. Waiting for what... I'm not sure. But then one of them asked me what I thought. I had to admit that I didn't know what I thought and that it felt like I was in over my head. I was baptized in the Spirit that very night.

Have you ever been in over your head?

"Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain." (Ps. 139:6)

If you have ever met God, you know that you were in over your head. It's humbling to know that you really can't understand a thing. (Especially if you've always been able to pick up everything right away, like me.) But until you reach the point of knowing that you can't understand, you won't be able to start knowing God. If you are always afraid of being humbled, even humiliated, you will never know God. Let go of your need to understand, and then you can start to know.

There was a wise man who lived alone atop a very tall mountain. Sometimes people would come to him, asking for wisdom. One day, a man scrambled up the final ridge of the mountain. He was cold and exhausted from the climb, but he came and bowed before the wise man. The wise man said, "What would you ask of me?"

"I want to know what you know," the man said. "I want to know the secrets of your wisdom; I want to know the answer."

"What answer?"

"Well, you know, the answer. I want to know whatever there is to know."

"Would you like a cup of hot tea?" the wise man offered.

Very aware of his tired limbs and the numbness in his fingers and toes, the man gladly said yes. The wise man silently brewed the tea and brought out a cup for his guest, and when the tea was ready, he poured it into the teacup. He kept pouring until the tea was right up to the rim of the cup. And then he poured some more, and some more.

"Stop! What are you doing?" the man exclaimed. "Stop it! The cup can't hold any more."

"Nor can you," the wise man said, "until you have emptied yourself. You are full of your own thoughts and wisdom, so how can you receive mine? Go empty yourself of all you thought was true, and then I can begin to fill you with what is real."