| i've been eating like glutton.
but not anymore.
it stops today.
i reverted back to my cutting today.
i think i may have had a mental break down after my last class.
i have lost control.
the pressure is too much.
i have to cut, there is no other way to let out this anger, this rage, that i have.
but no one must know, only me.
no one would be able to help anyways, so there is no reason to burden them with my problems.
i fucking hate myself right now.
the only things that can settle me now are cutting, and losing weight.
why did i stray from this for so long?
i was unhappy the entire time,
i should have known better.
don't make this mistake like me.
i won't ever be happy unless i'm thin, and neither will you.
they don't understand that.
Intake:
b-coffee
l-coffee
(and hopefully a cigarette)
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| must be 125 by thanksgiving |
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| it's been way too f-ing long!
the summer was disastrous.
i gained about 10 lbs
i'm more disgusted than ever
i have a new bf now, though i'm not quite sure why
he must have a fetish for fatties.
i must be down 15 lbs by the end of steptember.
my goal is that by thanksgiving i will be 125.
my sister and brother-in-law are coming from CA and my mom says she's been losing weight.
i must be thinner.
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