mish_sze
read my profile
sign my guestbook

Visit mish_sze's Xanga Site!

Name: Michelle
Country: Malaysia
State: KL
Birthday: 4/7/1990
Gender: Female


Interests: Is a person who loves God with all her heart. Loves crazy moments but is serious when needed to. Adores extreme stuff and dares to do anything dumb. Is always hyper about going to YC every Sunday. Admires any sort of dance. Won't mind being given loads and loads of presents for no reason.
Expertise: Loving God!
Occupation: Student


Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
MSN: michelle.ng74@hotmail.com
ICQ: 258058628
Yahoo: michelle_rockz@yahoo.com


Member Since: 8/16/2004

SubscriptionsSites I Read
fireofmine
creeztofer
lecylong
rachel_danielle1988
Michelle_Kin
lilBIGstar
asha_omatic
Jay_Freak
turkey90
chibiBrEn
Elleberry
differenT_uniquE
POTTERandCLAY
twlynn
bellagirl35
sulin05
ykxiong
j2tX
leonglilli
justprisc
geneva88
hangie_hang
TheXangaTeam
angelld
SookTeng
SLimSY
bO0Ogieman
crapeology
nokia5
gewoonelselyn
clarice_the_wong
sripetalingrocks
ChickenWife
chookinat
chimerawaltz
benpi_itsumo
annegal
TaMaNDeSaCeLLgRoUp
sasagurl
addictiv3
Josaw
zhaoyen
Daniel_YJH
mijim
bencheok
hmaker
nigellooi
Radical_J
Fr3eD0m
DClef
XaNgA_MuSiC
Janfaye
marktan79
valerietan
christfreek
Neocable
jCr0Xxx
chubes
HeartbeatBand
chuckie84
joe_fats
sheenB
terryrizer
weeli
hengian
brainfizz
louisesoh

Blogrings
YC Narutoians...
previous - random - next

>> Cf Chs <<
previous - random - next

function-Z
previous - random - next

Y.C~ians
previous - random - next

> Planet Shakers <
previous - random - next

C~H~S~ians
previous - random - next

i'M.a.JeSuS.fReAk*_
previous - random - next


Posting Calendar

|<< oldest | newest >>|
view all weblog archives

Get Involved!

Suggest a link

Recommend to friend

Create a site

Monday, January 01, 2007

The Old Has Gone

I'm moving blog!!

http://www.michelleng74.blogspot.com

Check it out! Cheers! 


Saturday, December 30, 2006

A Note Before 2007

I want to end 2006 with Him and start 2007 with Him. There’s no way I would rather end and start my years in a better way than this.

 

I would say that 2006 has been a really good year, though I still think that it could be better. If there’s anything that I would say about my year was that it went the way He wanted it to go. So, what more can I ask for?

 

I’m glad with what I’ve accomplished. Be it in school as a prefect/student or in YC as an assistant CG leader or even as a dancer in JC Works. I’m proud of whatever I’ve done so far and I pray and hope that I’ve touched someone’s life in a way or another.

 

Wait.

Hold that thought.

Let me correct what I just said,

 

I pray and hope that God has used me to touch someone’s life in a way or another. It doesn’t really matter if they remember me or not. All that matters is that I’ve been used as a vessel to bring another one step closer to Him.

 

Anyway, 2007’s in less than 37 hours time.

 

What’s me resolutions?

 

Merely to live life the way He wrote my story to be. To lean on him every single day of my life and to draw ever so much closer to him with every living breathe I take.

 

Author’s note  : I don’t really like this post. I won’t have any time to post anything before the year ends so I must as well do it now. Sorry for the unauthentic entry. I promise better ones in the year to come. Till then, Happy New Year all!!


Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Please, Look Beyong What I Say

I can’t take this anymore. I just can’t. Tears run down my face as I see him in his own nature. I long to give him the love he needs. How I long to merely show him what’s really the meaning of caring for someone unconditionally.

 

But I just can’t.

 

‘I don’t think I can go on with you anymore. I can’t stand your nature any longer. What seems normal to you just isn’t to me. I’m sorry.’

 

Everything just came out all at once. The hurt. The agony of holding it in for so long. But I simply just couldn’t control what I wanted to really say.

 

‘Well I expected it. You were actually acting really weird…’

 

He expected it? And he’s going to let me go just like that?

 

‘I thought from the beginning that we knew that we were from two different worlds’ he added.

 

My hands trembled as he said those words. Deep down inside I was longing for him to look beyond those words and to see how much I do love him. How much I wish that he’ll say that I’m the perfect one for him.

 

‘You’re a wreck, you know that? Have some self worth for goodness sake…’ I whispered in a deep, harsh tone.

 

What was I saying? In that instant I just wished that I could take back everything that I said.

 

‘Well from what I see, there wasn’t anything wrong with us but your ego. It’s just too big for you to handle.’ He blurted in an instant.

 

No! No! I really didn’t mean anything I just said. Please, look beyond what I say, I beg you.

 

I pressed my lips. I didn’t dare say anything anymore. I was just afraid that it came out wrong. Deep down I knew it was too late.

 

We’re just too different. Practically from different worlds.

 

He turned. And walked away.

 

Note : Fiction


Monday, December 25, 2006

Daddy and Pearls

Lynette was 16 years old. She was and is still daddy’s little girl, and she never grew tired of it.

 

She always loved sitting on daddy’s lap every random moment daddy wanted to say a little prayer before she left the house.

 

She still and always long for moments where she can slide in daddy’s arms once he’s fast asleep.

 

Every evening, just before dinner, she’ll always wait for daddy to come home just so that she can pounce on him and give him the biggest hug a daughter could give.

 

Yeah, she was the perfect daughter every father would want to keep and hold on for eternity (if possible). But daddy knew that there was some time where he’ll have to let little Lynette grow and in due time, leave him one day.

 

So on her 16th birthday, daddy took out a velvet box from the upper section of his wardrobe and sat beside Lynette. Daddy said ‘Honey, you’ll have to leave home one day to be with someone else. To be someone else’s wife and after some time, you’d have little kids to be a mother to…’

 

Smiling, Lynette listened attentively just as she always has even though daddy’s lectures might be a little draggy at times.

 

‘But Lynette, dear, before you give your heart to anyone, pass one of these to the man that you think is capable of being yours.’

 

Slowly, daddy opened up the box. Lynette’s eyes widen.

 

Inside were a string of pink pearls. 7 of them to be exact. They were perfect, without blemish. ‘I have been pearl hunting every time I told you and your mother that I was going deep sea fishing. It was hard finding the perfect ones but I managed after all these years.’ said daddy.

 

Gently, Lynette unhooked the string of pearls from the box and stared at them in admiration.

 

‘Thank you daddy! Thank you so so much! I promise I’ll take good care of them! Oh! I promise!!’ she said while giving daddy the tightest hug in her whole 16 years of her life.

 

                                                            *          *          *

 

It was her freshman year in college. And Lynette met a special someone. He was a national swimmer, always did his country proud by bringing back sacks of medals. He was a nice person. Good looks, attitude, he had everything.

 

They have been going on for some time now. But Lynette remembered daddy’s words very well. So one morning, in the hallway, Lynette passed him one of the pearls without saying a word. He smiled, gave her a hug and walked away.

 

She thought that she met The One. He was everything that she ever though of. She prayed ever so hard every night that the pearl was still in good condition.

 

Months passed, and Lynette was doing in a favor by getting his Chemistry text book from his locker.

 

But what she found in his locker then literally killed a piece of her. She found the pearl in the rusty corner behind his Maths book. Dented. Chipped. Craked.

 

                                                            *          *          *

 

It was Lynette’s third year in university. She got her dream of studying Law in Cambridge.

 

And there was another.

 

She just recovered from the hurt she endured the last time and decided that it was about time to move on.

 

He was a rather amazing person. Studied Computer Software and guess what? He got her her first webcam for her birthday!

 

And then she remembered what daddy said again. That Friday night after her birthday, she handed him one of those pearls again.

 

They were doing well for some time. They were really an icon in campus. Everyone knew who they were. You won’t be surprised if I told you that they were labeled the ‘Perfect Couple’.

 

Until she found the pearl she gave him just a few months ago

 

                                                            *          *          *

 

 

Lynette just finished her PhD then and decided to do part time in church before pursuing her career.

 

And she met him. They took care of the same cell group. Little 14 year old kids.

 

He was really the caring one. He would go up to any lost sheep in the bunch and gave that kiddo the attention he or she needed.

 

And so she thought that he could be trusted. She passed him another pearl.

 

But she was wrong. She was terribly wrong.

 

                                                            *          *          *

 

It wasn’t long before all the pearls ended up in the same condition. All dented. All chipped. All cracked.

 

With tears streaming down her face, she took every single one of them back to daddy.

 

‘Daddy…I…I…’

‘Hush my daughter, let me take a look at those pearls.’

 

Lynette took all 7 of them out from her pocket and placed them in daddy’s hands.

 

‘Daddy I’m sorry…I promised to take good care of them but…’

‘Hey it’s alright. Let’s see what I can do with them’

 

Daddy gave her a hug, wiped away the last tear on her cheek and headed off to his workshop behind the house.

 

After and hour or two, daddy came out, smiling.

 

He sat beside Lynette on the couch and opened up his hands with the pearls in them. His hands were bruised with cuts all over. There were a few plasters here and there. And there were even splinter bleeds at every crease of those fatherly hands.

 

But those pearls that were once in Lynette’s hands became perfect again, they were fixed to the way daddy gave them 10 years ago.

 

‘Thank you daddy! I’m sorry for the hurt I caused you when I asked you to fix them…’

‘Lynette dear? Is there anything that I wouldn’t do for you?’

 

Note: Fiction


Saturday, December 23, 2006

Dear God..

109445541_789630f771

How could you bear with this kind of hurt?

How could you have taken me in after all I’ve done?

 

God I’m so worthless. I bet if there was only one space left in heaven, I would not even deserve a fraction of it. But yet you took me in and showered me with unconditional love.

 

You told me that You’ve been waiting all along.

You told me that You cried day and night every time I took another step away from you.

You told me that You’ve always been watching all this while.

You told me that You want the best for me and nothing less.

 

God, I’m the last person that deserves this. Yet you took me in and showed me what real love is.

 

You healed my scars and clothed me with the finest material.

You took me to your dinner table and stuffed me only with the most heavenly food.

You tucked me into bed and made sure that I was sound asleep before leaving my side.

 

And what have I done to deserve this?

 

I disobeyed You.

I turned away from You.

I chucked You aside.

I caused You more hurt that You already have.

 

But yet You opened up Your doors the second I said that I needed You.

 

All I ask…

God, all I ask

Is for You to break me with the conditions that break Your heart.



Next 5 >>

Chitter Chatter!!


*HUGS* TOTAL! give mish_sze more *HUGS*



*HUGS* TOTAL! give mish_sze more *HUGS*
Get hugs of your own

<bgsound src="http://www.jiggajayd.com/tunes/TheKatinas_ThankYou.wma" loop="infinite">