There are some days when I just want to run outside and scream, "I love you!" to the sky and I don't care who hears or sees my huge cheeks crinkling upwards in joy, taking over my face. All that time I spent crying, praying, hoping, wishing, dreaming... it pays off in the end. Sometimes I fall asleep before I thank God one more time for making me the luckiest girl in the entire world, ever. But then I wake up in the middle of the night and remember and smile and resume my Allah-talk and then promptly fall asleep again. It's often the things that make you the most unhappy that provide you with the utmost happiness in the end. Oh love, love, love, love. I feel as if I'm no longer afraid. Fine, that's a lie. But this is a good fear. This is a silly fear. Not the silly fear where everybody else doesn't feel it so they call you silly, but the silly fear that all the capable people in the world have. The silly fear that makes you giggle to yourself and look at the person next to you and giggle some more. The fear of failing is no longer here, for the moment. I am done with shivering in nauseated anticipation, wondering what everybody is thinking of me. I am done with starving myself to the point where my salivary glands become overly active when they look at a picture of cheesecake online. I am done with frowning at people who remind me of myself. I am done with scoffing at little girls who scream themselves hoarse at pictures of the Jonas Brothers. Done, done, done. Now it's love, love, love. | 
