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| | Having Fun With Hollywood, 2006Yes, yes, I know many of you think that is impossible, but you're quite wrong.
I've boycotted the Oscars for so long I can't remember the last time I watched the show. Instead of celebrating good films and good actors, it has become a tedious lecture with sparkles on the syllabus. The films nominated are usually awful, or at the very least, bad. Lately, it has also leaned more and more toward slapping regular (real) Americans in the face for our common-man lives, morals and concerns. Having received more than enough lectures from my parents and a few liberal instructors throughout my life, I'd much rather (and usually do) curl up with a good book or classic movie instead of watching the self-congratulation of the Oscars, Golden Globes, Grammys, and so forth.
Nevertheless, I was going to offer my Oscar predictions until Ann Coulter beat me to the punch - in all seriousness, the woman has pretty much stolen the words from my head. But she gets paid to write, while I get paid to pay people, and blogging must fall by the wayside. So go read Ann, and then come back for my advice.
Welcome back, dahlinks.
The best way for you to have fun with the Oscars this (or any) year, other than viewing the show with the cast of MSTK or a reasonable fascimile thereof, is not to watch the show. Still, some Americans feel lost, knowing (assuming) that the rest of the nation is enjoying our elites' finest soiree. These Americans, bless their hearts, want something to do. Therefore, I offer my suggestions.
Other than ignoring the Oscars or flat-out ridiculing them, there are two other options: watch actual good movies or watch movies that mock Hollywood and its offspring.
In the first category, I suggest:
Zoolander: Okay, this mocks fashion instead of Hollywood - most of the time. Close enough, and I find Vogue and its cohorts just as tiresome as today's entertainment business. This was my 2004 Oscar night film, if I recall. It's silly, even stupid, but it is funny. Perhaps I find it so enjoyable because I've worked in cosmetics, theatre, and advertising, but your average alert American should find it entertaining.
Team America: World Police: I really don't need to say anything, do I? And if ever a song deserved an Oscar nomination (if they mattered), it is Kim Jong-Il's rousing solo, "You Are Worthress Arec Bardrin". Or, better yet, The End of An Act.
Arrested Development: This show actually just mocks everything. And I love it. And I hate FOX and stupid Americans who somehow manage to keep drivel like 'Stacked' and 'Desperate Housewives' on the air. (This is one of only 3 shows I ever watched on television.)
Well, that's about it as far as mocking Tinseltown goes, isn't it? Too bad, because we need more. I considered putting Napoleon Dynamite in there, but that is a film that denies categorization.
Now to the good films. There are many, many of these, but here are a few favourites of mine - including a movie about REAL cowboys.
Cinderella Man: To me, this is the best film of 2005 (qualifier: I have not yet seen Walk the Line). Cinderella Man is a terrific film - maybe even a great one. It isn't flashy, it isn't brimming with special effects, porn stars, or snappy one-liners. But it is a terrific story, one that you feel good after watching. It's a slice of the true Golden Age of Hollywood - a solid story about good people that is well-acted by a superb cast. It's a very family-friendly film - although some of the boxing scenes may be too intense for little ones. I can't recommend this film highly enough, and am still furious that it was snubbed for the Oscars - then again, perhaps I shouldn't be. It would be an insult to the movie, the actors, and the writers to nominate this fine film with the dreck they are glorifying this year. Watch this movie. I guarantee you'll enjoy it.
Arsenic and Old Lace This Cary Grant classic is hysterically funny. Watching it recently for the first time in nearly a decade, I found myself in tears near the end - while Grant has quite the reputation as a romantic lead, I think his comedic work is excellent. Again, this is great for the whole family (even the little ones), and it's a keeper, not just a renter. Terrific acting (Josephine Hall, as one of Grant's crazy aunts, is a doll) and great writing - not to mention fabulous wardrobe for Grant's on-screen fiance - make this another must-see, if you've not already!
Harry Potter These are just plain fun. The films have a few hiccups and don't compare to the books, but that shouldn't stop you. They're entertaining, funny, cute, and even have a gentle moral lesson. Additional fun factor: You can watch all three movies (the fourth is being released Tuesday), including breaks, and when you are done, the Oscars will still be going.
Another option for 'just plain fun' is the summer blockbuster Batman Begins, starring the Pink Kitty's favourite dreamboat, Christian Bale, and the incubator for the Spawn of Tom Cruise, winsome and wooden Katie Holmes. It isn't great, but it isn't bad, either; it is beautiful to watch, entertaining, and of course has plenty of action - as well as another subtle moral lesson. Cillian Murphy as the villian nearly steals the show, and Liam Neeson also stars.
If it is film noir you're looking for, go with Billy Wilder's classic Double Indemnity. Siren Barbara Stanwyck plays with fire, and Fred MacMurray (not the My Three Sons MacMurray you may be accustomed to) are terrific. The drive-in beer stand is fun, too.
In the mood for thrills? I can't stand Tom "Rolling Eyeballs" Cruise, but his role in 2004's Collateral is pretty darned good. Jamie Foxx as the cab driver who thinks he is just picking up another customer is excellent. This movie is non-stop once it gets going - you probably won't want to walk away from the TV. The cinematography is beautiful as well - very slick, chic, and cutting, exactly what the story calls for.
In a similar but not-similar vein is 2002's sleeper hit Equilibrium, also starring Bale. I owe my very knowledge of this to the PK and Elena; it's sort of a combination of the Matrix, 1984, and Gattaca (less the socialism stuff in the latter). Action-packed and beautifully shot, Equilibrium has a familiar message that is still told well-enough to keep you watching and enjoying yourself.
I suppose I should offer a chick flick because some women just insist upon them. Therefore, I give you 1995's Sense and Sensibility. Kate Winslet, Emma Thompson, Alan Rickman, and himbo Hugh Grant star in this sweet, charming adaptation of Jane Austen's classic. It is enjoyable to watch, and one of the only chick flicks I enjoy. Watch it, then go read the book. You'll have time, believe me.
Finally, it just isn't a Miss O'Hara movie fest without at least one Jimmy Stewart recommendation, right? I have two for you. The first is the classic Harvey, in which Stewart plays a sweet, good-hearted alcoholic who befriends an imaginary (is it?) six-foot-tall rabbit by the name of Harvey after his mother dies. I've loved this movie since I was a little girl - Jimmy acts it wonderfully (of COURSE), and it truly is a charming movie, although with a subtle dark undertext. This one is fun for everyone, and sure to become a favourite.
My final offering is a movie starring real men about real cowboys: Jimmy stars with John Wayne and Lee Marvin in The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance. The Amazon.com review says it may be "the saddest western ever made," as it predicts the end of the wild west (and indeed, the men who conquered it), and it may well be - yet it's a terrific movie nevertheless, probably one of the best westerns ever made. Jimmy plays an idealistic young lawyer who gains fame and fortune when he stands up to town terror Liberty Valance (played by Marvin) after realizing that fine words and the law won't always protect those who abide by the law. This thoughtful film about the man who really shot Liberty Valance is excellent, satisfying - and it stars three of the greatest actors of its era. Cinematography is great and the acting is better - if you don't like this western, you do not like westerns.
Really, Liberty Valance could stand in for Brokeback and Munich, couldn't it?
So, those are Miss O'Hara's Oscar night recommendations. Enjoy these movies - and feel free to add your own suggestions for other readers! Most unfortunately, we're likely to have Academy Awards shows for many years to come.
| | | Posted 3/3/2006 2:40 PM - 3 comments
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