Weblog

Thursday, July 03, 2008

  • brevard update:

    i'm not talking about the break up.  the less i talk about it the happier i am during the day because i am not forced to think about it as deeply.  he's a piece of shit who doesn't deserve any lick of the fortune and happiness he's gotten the past two months.  'nuff said.

    i am alive, and for the most part i've stopped throwing up.  see above statement.  fucker.

    i have indeed made new friends here, and i hope they last cuz they are some pretty sweet people.

    i don't know what else to say right now other than i'm just trying to live every day.

    i'll leave you with this:

    the sweetest revenge is being able to prove how much stronger and better you are without them.

    fucker.

Monday, June 02, 2008

  • figure it out.

    i've come to this site and clicked on "new entry" about a dozen times this past week, but i'm having a hard time putting it all into words.  maybe it's that i know you won't read it, or even if you do you won't care.  i'd be dealing a lot better with everything if this new girl wasn't in the dating picture.  i just really can't handle that.  what is wrong with me?  am i that unattractive to everyone?  it's really her.  i could handle absolutely everything else except her.  i just..... i can't handle it.  and betsy and ant aren't here to stop the codeine like they were at school.  i just don't understand how this all happened...

    Yeah he's a looker,
    but I really think it's guts that matter most.
    I displayed them for you,
    strewn out about from coast to coast.

    I am easily make believe,
    just dress me up in what you want me to be.
    I'll take back what I've been saying for quite some time now.

    I gotta feel you in my bones again,
    I'm all over you.
    I'm not over you.
    I wanna taste you one more time again,
    I'm all over you.
    I'm not over you.

    In my daydreams, in my sleep,
    infatuation turning into disease.
    You could cure me, see all you have to do now
    is please try.
    Give it your best shot and try.
    All I'm asking for is love,
    but you never seem to have enough.

    I gotta feel you in my bones again,
    I'm all over you.
    I'm not over you.
    I wanna taste you one more time again,
    I'm all over you.
    I'm not over you.
    This life is way too short
    to get caught up in all this stuff
    when I just want you to love me back,
    why can't you just love me back?

    Why can't you just love me back?
    (why can't you, why can't you)
    Why can't you just love me back?
    (why can't you, why can't you)
    Why can't you just love me back?
    (why can't you, why can't you just love)

    I gotta feel you in my bones again,
    I'm all over you.
    I'm not over you.
    I wanna taste you one more time again,
    I'm all over you.
    I'm not over you.
    This life is way too short
    to get caught up and all mixed up
    when I just want you to love me back,
    why can't you just love me back?

    Why won't you just love me back?

    Why can't you just love me back?

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

  • trying to work through the pain here...

    I try to make it through my life
    In my way
    There is you
    I try to make it through these lies
    That’s all I do

    Just don't deny it
    Just don't deny it
    And deal with it
    Yeah deal with it

    You tried to break me
    You wanna break me
    Bit by bit
    That’s just part of you

    If you were dead or still alive,
    I don't care,
    I don't care,
    And all the things you left behind,
    I don't care,
    I don't care

    I try to make you see my side
    Always trying to stay in line
    But you’re all I see right through
    That’s all they do
    Im getting tired of this shit
    I got no room when inside this
    But if you wanted me just deal with it

    So...

    If you were dead or still alive,
    I don't care,
    I don't care,
    And all the things you left behind,
    I don't care,
    I don't care

    (I never cared about, I never cared about)

    (You won't be there for me; you won't be there for me)

    (Piano solo)

    If you were dead or still alive,
    I don't care,
    I don't care,
    And all the things you left behind,
    I don't care,
    I don't care

    If you were dead or still alive,
    I don't care,
    (I never cared about, I never cared about)
    I don't care,
    And all the things you left behind,
    I don't care,
    (you won't be there for me, you won't be there for me)
    I don't care at all

Saturday, May 10, 2008

  • i can't do this.

    i can't stop thinking about him.

    i didn't finally fall asleep until 5 am, and that was only because my body couldn't take it anymore.

    i kept waking up every 1.5-2 hours until noon.

    i'm still thinking about him.

    i just wish he'd call.

    i just can't do this.

    i can't do this!

Thursday, May 08, 2008

  • newsflash:

    i still can't stop crying.

    although i don't really think that's much of a newsflash.

    i was done with my ASL final today before it technically even was supposed to start.  bed?  i think i'll try.

musicancilla

  • Visit musicancilla's Xanga Site
    • Name: laura
    • Country: United States
    • State: Illinois
    • Metro: Chicago
    • Birthday: 4/11/1987
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 10/29/2003

About Me

  • college junior trying to juggle school with music, a sorority (Phi Mu) and a long-distance relationship with the most amazing guy ever... the rest you'll just have to pick up as you read my site.

Pulse

Photostrip

[no photos]