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| This is a poem by Shel Silverstein that I absolutely love.... my sister gave me a photocopy of it when I was in high school:
I'm alL mixED uP,
i'M aLl MiXed Up,
I dON't KnoW whAT tO Do.
I dO NOt thiNK i'M me tODAy,
i WoNdeR iF I'M YoU.
mY voICE is nOt My VOice TOday,
it sOUnDS enTIrELY wrONg,
and mANY ThOugHts INsIDe mY hEaD
i'm CeRTaIN dON'T bElOng.
My eYes aRE nOT My eYES toDay,
mY nOse is NOt MY nOSE,
my shOES aRe UNfAmiliaR,
I dOn'T REcOgniZe mY cLOThes.
My EaRs ArE NoT mY eArs tODay,
mY Hair iS nOt MY hAir,
I eVen thiNk i'M weAriNg
soMeOnE elSe'S uNdERwEar.
NO mATter wHAt i wriTe ToDAy,
IT COMes oUT LOOKing sTraNgE.
I HOpE ThaT i Can FIGure ouT
a WaY TO maKE iT ChanGe.
i'M lOokinG cLOsELy at This pOEm,
bUT STilL dOn'T HAvE a CLue -
i'M ALL miXed Up,
I'M alL MIxed uP,
i Don'T KNOw WHat To dO.
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| "Let me tell you something you already know: The world ain't all
sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't
care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you
there permanently. You, me or nobody is ever gonna hit as hard as
life [does]. But it ain't about how hard you hit, but about hard you can get
hit and keep movin' forward, how much you can take and keep movin'
forward.......THATS HOW WINNING IS DONE! Now if you know what you're
worth, go out and get what you're worth; but you gotta be willing to
take the hits and not [be] pointin' fingers saying you ain't where you wanna
be because of him, her or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you;
your better then that!"
~ motivational speech by somebody... (LOL)
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| Never Forget
The horror that he wreaks…
The blood spills…
The smell of burning human flesh…
Vanishing innocence…
And the whispers… Oh, the whispers…
“What was wrong with him?”
“Well, if you could accuse anybody of being evil, it would be him.”
These were the exact words of Adolf Hitler: “Our defeat is imminent. Germany will lose the war.”
He sought the coward’s way out: Suicide.
His death did not make six million Jews come to life again. Nor the others, the five million others who are often overlooked and forgotten. The disabled, the gypsies, the Poles, the Christians, Jehovah’s Witnesses, others. People who didn’t fit in the “norm” of humanity.
They existed in the world, and then one day, they started to disappear, like so many ghosts.
Never forget.
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| I've been thinking about ABC's LOST a lot lately. I've been a fan from the start - even though as the show goes on, the more confusing it gets. That island obviously has healing powers. If it meant that my body would be healed on the island, like John Locke's was, would I be willing to live on that island? I don't even have to hesitate. The answer is N-O. I barely tolerated camping as a child. I balk at the idea of camping now. I can't imagine living as if my life's one big camping trip. Even if I had access to some or all of the luxuries that the Others have, I wouldn't budge an inch from where I am now. I can't imagine answering to someone like Benjamin Linus. Talk about mysteries. His whole personality is one big question mark. You can't take anything he says seriously because it could be a lie. And the way he talks about the island as if it were a living, breathing THING creeps me out. And what's with the smoky thing? Is it something that the Others do to try to manipulate our Losties? Juliet didn't seem afraid when she came face to face with it. But it's not even the camping-out that's the problem for me. I can't imagine being cut off from my friends and family members like that. To have the world think I'm dead when I'm obviously alive and fighting for my life in some wilderness. That's not my ideal. Even my un-handicapped ideal. I would miss so much about the place I call Home. But this is not the Home that counts, is it?
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| Today was my sister's last day as an high school junior. She is, in the loosest meaning of the word, a senior now. All I can say is, I'm not ready for this. June 6, 2008 is her high school graduation date. I have a year and five days to get used to the fact that my baby sister is not a baby anymore. She's an amazing young woman.
She will turn 18 in exactly two months and twenty-seven days.
Memories are something to hold on to, aren't they? The day I learned that I was getting a sister, I was standing in the hall of the hospital with my mom and little brothers. Mom looked at me when she said, "It's a girl." I screamed in delight. I jumped up and down with excitement. I laughed with joy. I was seven years old and I knew in that moment, that this - my tiny little sister - was proof enough that God existed and that he did answer prayers. Jacqueline Marie has given me so much. She's my best friend.
Snapshots. Me and her playing house with our dolls, me calling her Aunt Jackie, her calling me Aunt Dani. "Let's start over again!" Us abandoning our "children" and having our firstborn all over again. Playing Barbies with her even though I was a freshman in high school. Listening to her sing all the songs in The Lion King and getting some of the words wrong. Hysterical. Her "jibber jabbering" about nothing at all, just talking to hear the sound of her own voice. Her giving her friend Haley a really bad haircut. Us dressing in matching dresses my great-grandmother made us at Christmas. Posing for pictures with her. Watching her one dance recital. Seeing report cards of nothing but As. Soccer games. Basketball games. Dress up. Letting her play with my hair. Watching movies with her. Shopping for her. Beauty and the Beast. The Hunchback of Notre Dame. The way she treated our really old cat (who I didn't like very much) with kindness. Mario, her cat with the blind eye. There's so much.
And I know the best is yet to come. Even if I don't have her right beside me, I will always cherish the memories of her childhood, because she was, and is, a big part of my life. | | |
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