GO LOOK!!!!!

They said a boy in his mental state was sure to do himself some harm
As he lay alone he carved, “our dreams are dead tonight” into his arm.
This night was never meant to come for him yet all seemed so planned
He found the illness, killed the cancer, as he cut it from his own hand.
He laughed a bit and cried a few tears of regret as he began feeling ill.
He grabbed a pen and paper and everything he wrote lives on still...

“Dear World,
I am the one you all neglected because you thought I had it all so good. You looked at me and my fake smile as I did everything I should. I played the part of the perfect boy and hid behind my eyes. But little did you all know most of my words were lies. I composed the perfect setting for such a story book tragedy. I laid the perfect groundwork for a movie they would call a ‘must see.’ I live a life you wish that you could live yourself. Until you get to know me and see all the baggage on my shelf. I hide behind a mix of perfect smiles and hopeful eyes. When in reality I am filled with lost hope and longing for goodbyes. I tried to hide all the warning signs of someone you could save. But it was just so hard being the one that gave and gave. I listened to the world and tried to solve all their issues. Little did anyone know all I was really doing was reaching out for ‘I love yous.’ I failed to help you see that all I really want is to be left alone. I tried to hint to everyone by ignoring the calls to my phone. You can leave a message but I’ll never call you back this time. I’ve done so much wrong I should be arrested for my crime. I lived a life that few would say they could have looked up too. But everyone was fake and said, ‘It must be great to be you!’ If I had a dollar for every time someone said they cared and lied, I’d be the richest dead man with millions by my side. So this is it my epic ending that you will read and cry. But don’t shed a tear if you can’t explain why. There isn’t really much to miss at least that’s how I feel. I mean if you read any of this, you know I wasn’t real. I lived a lie and died a liar alone with nothing left to hold on to. I just hope in reading this there is hope someone can save you. For now I finish writing for the blood is quickly leaving what’s left of me. I just wanted to write a letter to explain what you couldn’t see. Farewell cruel world that in my eyes never cared to know who I really was. I’ll be another kid that killed him self ‘just because.’ Blame it on a song I heard or watching too much TV. But I blame it on the lack of caring that is in our society.”

With that final word he died alone, without anyone there to save him from himself.
He left the note right next to all the baggage he had burdening him on his shelf.
His bloodstained farewell to the world he couldn’t stand will live for many years.
And for those who read and understand we can only offer up our caring tears.
We live a life that no one knows because it’s safer then trusting people in the end.
We kill ourselves everyday just for a chance to start over and begin again.

 Also...

the perfect execution of all my beliefs

he sinks deep below the sheets trying to escape all he knows, or doesn't know, that's kind of the point of the story. everyone he trusts seems to betray him and leave him wondering if the idea of true friendship exists. he knows he has seen what it is to love someone and be loved back so how can people hate and hurt and lie and cheat so easily? he gets up in the dark and stands in the doorway, he knows where they are, and he wants to forget they exist. the TV is on but there is nothing on the screen just like the light is on but he knows they aren't coming home. his eyes are sad and they could make the happiest of people shed tears. he has nothing to live for when it feels like no one is living for him. the most easily lived in situations all suddenly become so complicated. the concept of forgiveness is so hard for him to understand when everytime he forgives he still can't forget. he'd burn alive to keep them from freezing but in an instant he would be the first one they set on fire. he would die for his friends yet they are dying to give him reasons to forget they were ever in his life. its hard to be the nice guy getting walked on like a doormat. "leave your problems here" and then move on with your life forgetting i'm right outside the door for you. no amount of affection can heal wounds cut so deep by the betrayl of someone you thought you could call a loved one. she's coming for the weekend yet he's staying out late, a complicated story, yet no one gets caught. if you love her so much how can you do these things? if he is your friend how can you walk all over him and continue to take the things he cares about? there is a certain amount of respect in the home of another and this time the line was well overstepped. take a bow and quit the act or you will be fading out faster than a candle on the end of its wick. violence does nothing but seems like the solution when you play it through in your head. people ask you if you care and then ignore your answer to walk all over you. God bless dignity, he was a great man, may he rest in peace next to honesty and we can forget such things exist. You are compromising your future and not seeing the worst part of it. Once he is gone he is far away and distant, its time to throw in the towel, admit defeat and say goodbye. the hero has fades out of his last epic scene and is drunk with despair that he has nothing left. may you remember him as a friend even though he can never say the same for you.