JULY! Yep... it's time for my quarterly post. It's hard work posting 4 times a year PEOPLE! Seriously, give me a break!
Ok so, let's see... the last time I posted, I nearly puked from the smell that permeated my olfactory senses (more on that later)! Along with buying a cute dog to play with... an unfortunate and rather unwanted bi-product is the smells that he produces from time to time. We've grown quite accustomed to them now. He's a keeper, I suppose.
And, he can swim... so, from now on we can blame the bubbles that rise up out of the water on him! He makes for a most excellent scapegoat, trust me! And, he doesn't seem to mind one bit. Although, he did violate 1 of the major rules of any swimming party where there are girls involved! Unless, of course, puking
IN THE POOL has officially been made cool or something?!? Yeah... I think he was in some kind of violation of being "
cool, in the pool" as they say. Let's just leave it at that.
WAIT!!!... I just can't "leave it at that." I tried, and I can't (
sorry Jackie). This next quarterly item on my
"tell this story to the Xanga faithful next quarter" list... well, it's kind of gross. To be honest, it was so gross... well, let's just say it was G-to-the-ROSS and leave it at that. Okay, so maybe I'll spare some details. Okay, I'll spare a LOT of the details... but here are some keywords, and maybe you'll get the gist:
Keywords: Headache, McDonalds, Wendy's Vanilla Frosty (
Yummy btw), Chills, Sweating, Chills, "Pre-Vomitous Mouth Watering," Trash-Can, Chunky (
Not-so Yummy btw), Possible-Migraine Headache, Dry-Heaving, More Chunky, McDonalds Fry Chunks Through the Nose (
day of the incident), McDonald's Fry Chunks Through the Nose (
morning after the incident).
Enough said??? Get the gist? Need more details? Really, just say so... I'll be happy to oblige.
On a lighter note... I might be "Clairvoyant". And a "Dreaming Clairvoyant" at that. So, I wake up the other morning... nearly panic-stricken b/c of a bad dream I had. It was a dream that directly correlated to the following website and pictures within the website (
http://www.fazed.org/content/clock_spider/). Just think about those pictures, and make the spiders behind the clock 5-10x that size... then you'll be right there with me in my bad dream, surrounded. So, I wake-up... not too happy with my brain for doing that to me. Fast forward to today. The clairvoyant part comes in to play b/c my puppy, Newman... became "
Newman the Spider-Slayer Puppy" tonight!!! That's right... he had a little tangle with a spider lurking in Jackie's bed (of all places --- that'll make for some interesting nights going to sleep for her now won't it??!?). Anyway... so, he pounced on the spider on the bed, b/c he pounces on nearly EVERYTHING, and ate it like the good little Spider-Slayer that he is. Unfortunately, as he was licking his lips... he left some of the remains up on his nose. Yummy. Save some of that for later. I bet he was saying that to himself. Oh well, he still sounds like a HERO to me, don't you think?!?!
Welp... that about wraps up this edition of "
A Quarter in the Life of n8_c00p3r"! Plus, my "throw-up muscles," as I call them... they hurt when I laugh right now. Too much laughing involved in writing my own posts... you really have NO IDEA.
Farts, Spiders and Puking, OH MY!
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