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dexian
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| sabbatical over!big fat snigger
hold your horses, the shit is about to hit the fan.
this thing looks to be revived, or on some other host..
watch this space.
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| up up and awaybye!
there will be a new site soon.. you know i probably can't stay off spewing random thoughts for too long. am leaving xanga behind because, well.. for someone who doesn't have a way with (spoken) words, writing is my freedom, as i'm sure many of you would identify. true to my inner nomad, i've been here long enough to feel boxed in, and many times, infringed on.. so it's time to move.
please email me if you'd like to be kept in the loop! sorry la like i'm such a big deal like that.. che where got
or when the site actually happens.. i might post it back up here. it's been a good 4 years. muaaaarrrrrhhh
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| have notbeen doing the blogging thing of late, because it's pointless being cryptic. kind of shying away from being exhibitionist as well (tempering my streak! haha), so not that many photos either. should i even apologize? heh. i think this is the 3rd or 4th time i've said i was gonna do this, but i'm really thinking of stopping blogging altogether. that, or moving to some other site.. maybe not.
i have a great life. so damn great that when i write about it i feel like i'm boasting. and i don't really wanna do that. and when i start whining, i feel like i shouldn't have any reason to whine whatsoever. and the truth is, in real life, i am one hugeass whiner because sometime shit happens and it can get a bit overwhelming so i, uh, start whining. ironically, it's logging onto xanga and starting to type a rant that gives me a little perspective, and all i can say is thank God for the backspace key and the back button.
right now M and i are trying to figure out what "no balls" is in hokkien; how are we this useless?!
i had an existentialist crisis once, and then i resolved it by deciding that not everything in life needed to have a point. but now increasingly when i do things or want to do them there's the question of whether my activities of choice are meaningless. but honestly, after pondering for about 5minutes, all i can think of is that i can't wait to grow up and get busier so i won't have the time to think about shit like that.
more and more, i feel that education, while essential, is terribly overrated. more often than not it makes a lot of us arrogant pricks, at some point in time or another.. all the time for some. random late night insomniac thought, sorry.
maybe i'm blogging because i handed in my last assignment for the semester, though class continues for the next month or so. i'm now also a published writer, and work continues till i leave for new york so it's not scot-free for me just yet. i don't wish it though, writing gives me a chance to get out more. my base state, i've realised, is pretty sedentary.. unhealthily so. i'm practically married to my macbook pro and am actually pretty fine with staying under my quilts and not stepping out all day. i think next year i have to live near a park. random thought again... but it has much to do with my antisocial tendencies.
if i had enough cash in my bank acct, i would be off to arnhem in the netherlands for the fashion biennale. 10,000 sq m of city transformed into fashion paradise, watch me salivate and die.
i realise that this post is quite morose. so, on a brighter note, i'm headed back to good ol' brown for the time of my life this thursday and i am so excited that i'm irritating. and when i get back, the other M, my darling M, will be here.
that, and i'm in love with a fabulous man. a rare pipsqueak from my normally uneffusive impersonal self.
okay! off to write more stuff.. the work never ends.
obligatory photo for you lazy asses who always bug me for them because you don't want to read:
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| haha of all the times i choose to blog, i choose the night (morning of) my
technical terms exam. typical. as the screen turns a little blurry and
my eyes cross from overcaffeination, i'm trying to remember how to
define A-line, bias-cut, gussets and minaudieres.. technically. what
about a leg-of-mutton sleeve?
for the very first time ever maybe last week or so, i felt like i was
so done with school and entirely ready to work.. and it wasn't brought
on by me not liking my course or anything -i love it to bits- which
surprised me as much as relieved me, since i've always had the sneaking
suspicion that i was destined to be an eternal student.. part of my
whole escapism deal.. character flaw ;) i suppose it's just like how i
miss good ol' brown (beloved pvd in T-14) so bloody much but london in many ways is moving on
and moving up. but knowing me, 1 week into work (come this time next
year) i'm totally gonna be like sitting on my couch (if i even have one
in what i envision to be my £40-a-week zone-4 bedsit that i'll probably
have to share with a bunch of crackwhores) shutting my eyes willing
myself to wake up from the nightmare that is real life. but of course
it won't happen and then i'll just walk out to the kebab van and buy
greasy refried onion rings and a juicy kebab as sweet sweet escapism.
yes!
heavenly time at oxford with G, I and who else but my darling MEL who
bought truckloads of junk for us to gorge our faces to season 3 of
grey's. who now doesn't cook on high heat because she has learned
patience, who makes a mean bowl of noodles, who pranced around the
field in trinity like a loony and who walked hand in hand with me
around the campus such that we looked like a pair of right lesbians. oh and who did everything in between.
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| i amin bologna, home of spaghetti bolognese.
actually i dont even know if that is true, but by tomorrow evening i will be montecatini, the birthplace of the italian language and also home of the prada staff warehouse. those 2 facts i know are true. am in bologna for the lineapelle leather and accessories trade fair, which is perhaps (to me) the most interesting, enduring part of fashion and one of the most substantial- hurrah for narrowing down potential options for my future. the business of it is pretty damn cool and i would write more about it if not for the fact that it's 1.30am and i have to be up at 7.30.. and also there's a hairy burly italiano pacing behind me muttering and waiting to use the internet. maybe next time- it's been a while since i've blogged something good and honestly that makes me feel a bit of a flooze.
baci grande grande!
(baci is not the chocolate brand. it means kiss.)
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