Just within the past couple of days, I've been noticing that people's eyes seem to gravitate towards my baby bump before they are able to make eye contact with me.  It's as if they've never before seen a pregnant woman out in public.  As if my very presence offends them in some way.  The look on their faces reminds me of the reaction one might have when witnessing a terrible accident -- they really don't want to keep looking, but they can't seem to take their eyes off of the horrific scene in front of them.  And then, when they are finally able to look away, their eyes slowly meet mine in a look that I can only describe as sheer pity.  Really, folks, I appreciate your concern -- really, I do -- but I am okay.  No matter where I go, the conversation is sure to revolve around my grossly protruding abdomen.  The following phrases have become part of my daily vocabulary:

"No, I'm not having twins."

"Yes, it IS quite large, isn't it?"

"3 more weeks." or if they are looking uncomfortable, as if they are afraid that I'm going to go into labor and have the baby right there in front of them in full amniotic fluid-filled blood and gore, I might throw out the old "Any day now!" and watch them squirm.

"No, really.  I'm SURE that I'm not having twins!"

"Yes, my feet ARE quite swollen, aren't they?"

"Yes, I'm getting plenty of sleep while I still can."

And of course, the most common one, after running into someone that I see on a semi-regular basis who looks at me incredulously and exclaims, "You haven't had that baby YET?!" 

This one I say with a strained smile and through gritted teeth, "No, no I haven't.  Not yet."

Why do people ask this?  Are they trying to be funny?  Do they really think that I am unaware that I still have not birthed this child after 9 long months?  Seriously.  I am not in the mood.  The other questions I don't mind...this one really gets under my skin.

So now it's just a waiting game.  The doc says we're a go, ready for launch at baby's command.  I'm 50% effaced, between 2 and 3 cm. dilated, and my uterus is measuring 2 weeks ahead.  I'm excited, anxious, and impatient all at the same time.  We've got the clothes and bedding washed, car seat base installed, hospital bag packed, and thanks to an incredible burst of nesting power at 10 pm the other night, the house is clean and ready for the new addition.  I've been walking a lot.  We even took a long drive this morning down some bumpy roads just for the hell of it.  Short of drinking castor oil or (gasp!) having sex, I'm trying to coax my sweet little one out of her warm little incubator.  I know, I know...she'll come when she's ready.  If she's as stubborn as my husband, it will probably be the full 3 weeks that I have until my "official" due date.  So we wait.  And maybe, just maybe, my husband will get lucky tonight.  Or, at this point, maybe I am the one that's "getting lucky."  These days, I think that having sex with me is more of an act of pity on his part.

Observations, by My 7 Year Old Daughter.

Madison, closely examining her hands:  "Mommy, why do we have all of these little lines on our hands?"

Me:  "I don't really know, sweetie.  I guess that's just how God made us."

Madison, clapping her hands together, matter-of-factly:  "Well, I think that's where the claps come out of."

Hmph.  And there you have it, folks...

After 6-odd months or so of denying myself one of my absolute favorite things in the world, it dawned on my that I could still enjoy my coffee, with one minor adjustment...hold the caffeine, thank you very much.  Ah, decaf...quite possibly the greatest adaptation of any substance known to man...or at least to this pregnant woman.  Perhaps it's the fact that, until now, I haven't had coffee in several months, but I don't notice any taste difference.  It's actually quite nice to be able to enjoy the taste without the jitters one might experience after having one too many cups.  Anyway, enough rambling about coffee.  Obviously, I'm in heaven here.

After much deliberation, I have decided to go back to my present job after I have the baby.  They actually made me an offer that I would be a complete idiot to refuse.  So, if we really expect to move into a bigger house and afford luxuries such as, oh say...groceries, maybe?  I decided to suck it up and do it for my family.  As you all may know by now, I work in a busy pizza place, and while my job is stressful (don't laugh if you've never worked in the food industry -- I'm not kidding), Lord knows that it isn't difficult.  I can handle it.  It's really nice to know that I mean enough to the company for them to fight for me to stay.  I'm actually kind of excited about the opportunity.  If you would have told me in high school that I'd be nearly 30 years old and still slinging pies for a living, I would have laughed hysterically at you.  Eh, the things you do for a paycheck.  I've been introduced to a phenomenal babysitter, and while I was worried about the cost of childcare at first, the offer my company has made me will more than compensate for the expense.  Not that we'll be "livin' large" by any means --  please do not mistake this for bragging -- we just won't be stretching our paychecks as thin as we were expecting.  So that's a relief.  I was really stressed out about the whole job situation.

I have been having some MAJOR Braxton-Hicks contractions these past few days.  Man, I do NOT remember having these babies when I was preggo with Madison.  Let me just say that I am not enjoying them one bit.  It really caught me off guard at first, and my initial thought was "OHMYGODI'MGOINGINTOLABORAT6MONTHS!"  but then I realized that I was just being a little paranoid when they let up after a couple of seconds.  Still, though...ouch.  Not fun.  Baby Paige is definitely growing...sometimes I'm convinced that she is trying to come out NOW...through my skin, ala Alien-style.  It's going to get interesting as she gets even bigger...you can already see her antics from the outside, just by watching my belly.  I'm wondering if she's going to be a big baby.  With an interest in kickboxing.

Well, my delicious cup of baby-approved coffee is almost empty, so that means I need to get moving with the housework.  There's not a lot that needs done, but lately every little out-of-place thing is driving me berserk.  I have friend coming over around the noon-ish hour to scrapbook with me, so there's some things that I feel the need to scrub before her arrival.  We are both preggo with our second children, and we're both feeling the pressure to get "caught up" (LOL...does that ever really happen, fellow scrappers?) with our older children's scrapbooks before the new arrivals make in on the scene.  I'm excited to have found a scrapping partner, though, for sure.  She keeps me motivated.  I love to crop, but sometimes I'm just plain lazy.  Now I have someone to hold me accountable...although after the past couple times we've gotten together, I'm starting to feel the old obsession creep back in.  Much to the dismay of my husband, I might add.  While it's a very fulfilling hobby, it's not exactly cheap.  Again, enough rambling.  I'm off to clean my house...hope everyone has a great weekend!

Not that I expect everyone at work to "know my business," but one of the servers asked me today if I am pregnant.  I wanted to keep a straight face and respond, "What?!  No!!!!" to see her reaction, but I couldn't do it.  Maybe I just feel bigger than I really am, but c'mon...I'm nearly 6 months along already.  I thought that I was already out of the maybe-she's-just-eating-too-many-Twinkies stage.  Guess not.  It made me laugh, anyway.

Work today was absolutely horrid.  Remember that I work in a very busy pizza shop, and also keep in mind that it is Friday.  Around 3:30, we had a nice little power surge that threw our entire computer system offline for about 2 hours.  Our dinner rush starts around 4.  Add some high school cashiers that already don't know what the hell they're doing into the mix, and it makes for an interesting experience.  At one point, I just wanted to cry.  It was by far, the WORST time that I have EVER had at work.  I'm convinced that computers make us stupid, or at least they've made me that way.  My brain has forgotten simple math.  Thank goodness for calculators.  Anyway, I am so glad that it is over with now.  They needed me to stay over to help manage the front counter and phones, so I worked from 8 am until nearly 7 pm.  Needless to say my poor little preggo legs and feet are killing me.  I'll be heading off to bed soon.  I'm rather exhausted.  We have our Great Wolf Lodge trip scheduled for tomorrow, so I'm looking forward to that.  Lounging in a pool sounds fabulous right now.  I can't wait to see Madison's face when we pull up to the hotel.  She still has no idea that we're going.  She thinks that we're just going to the grocery store tomorrow!  I'm packing our bags tonight while she's asleep so we can already have them hidden in the car.  I can't wait for this surprise!

The baby has been moving so much lately!  I've been having a really difficult time sleeping, what with all of the acrobatics going on and the urge to pee practically every half hour.  I've actually had to start sleeping on the sofa!  I don't know what the difference is, but it's much more comfortable.  I love feeling her move, though.  Silly as it sounds, it's like our little secret.  My love for this kid gets stronger every second!  In other baby news, I told Troy the other night that I'm really stuck on the name Adeline Paige.  We had already decided on Paige, but I love the way the two sound together.  The good news is, he didn't say no.  He didn't say anything, LOL, but he didn't say no!  Maybe if I keep repeating it, it will start to grow on him.  She's already "Paige" to me, so even if we go with Adeline Paige, she'll probably only get called that when she's in trouble...lol!  Do you think that would be too much trouble for her to go by her middle name instead of first?  I just don't like the sound of Paige Adeline as much as the other way around.  Opinions?

Well, I called this morning to reschedule our trip to Great Wolf Lodge.  Madison is feeling much better and hasn't thrown up any more since last night, but she still isn't up for a weekend trip.  Of course, I wasn't able to simply cancel our reservations.  You have to call and cancel within 3 days of your scheduled arrival, less a $25 cancelation fee.  Any later than 3 days, and you forfeit the entire price of your stay -- which happens to be somewhere around, oh...let's say...$300!!!!  Ouch!  I respect the need for such policies, and they DID inform me of this *small* detail when I made our reservations, but still.  Bummer.  So, we're going to give it another go in 2 weeks. 

We are FINALLY rid of all of the Girl Scout cookies that have been lurking around our house.  I am so relieved to have them all delivered and all of the money collected.  It will be an even bigger relief to hand the funds over to our troop leader.  You should have seen our living room.  Madison was the top seller (that's my girl!) in her troop, but that also meant 255 boxes of cookies strewn about.  It was a sight to be seen.  One that I hope to never see again.  Until next year, of course.  ;)

I have to vent for a moment, so please excuse me.  I am ready to shake my husband, just shake the shit out of him.  It's already been established that we are expecting a second child, right?  Well, my husband had turned into an avid gun collector.  He keeps them locked up and has taught Madison to respect them, never to touch them, so that's not the issue at hand.  What is driving me totally insane is the fact that he keeps spending our money on them!  About a month ago, he dropped around $700 on a new pistol.  Today, he is driving to God Knows Where to pick up some automatic rifle that he HAS to have, which is another $800.  We aren't exactly scraping to get by, but we're not rolling in dough, either.  That is a lot of money to me.  One new gun is acceptable to me...still a frivolous expense, but if it makes him happy, then so be it.  But another one so soon?  And there's a third that he's had his eyes on for some time as well, and in the same price range.  I don't know what to do, but I am absolutely livid.  There is no talking to him, no getting him to understand how such funds would be better spent in the upcoming months on our expanding family.  We just used our tax return to pay off our credit cards, and he intends to charge this gun he's buying today.  He knows that I disapprove.  We got into a HUGE fight about it, and it became evident that this is a battle that I am NOT going to win.  Finally, I caved, and told him that if he really wanted this gun that badly, then to just get the damn thing.  We are supposed to be saving for a down payment on a house.  I just want to cry, really I do.  I love him dearly, but I just do not understand his thought process on this one.  He reasons that he'll have the credit card payed off again in a couple of months by working overtime, but I just can't get past the thinking that extra overtime money would be better put into our savings account for our future.  If we weren't expecting a new baby, this wouldn't be such an issue for me.  I respect his hobbies, but I just don't think that this is the time to be throwing money around.  He says that he feels like if he doesn't get this AR now before the baby comes, he'll never have the chance.  Yet there's still the other gun that he has been dying to get his hands on, and I know that once he has his mind made up to get that one, too, there will again be nothing that I can say to change his mind. 

Honestly, am I the one being unreasonable here?  I wonder if it's my maternal instinct kicking in that makes this seem completely ridiculous to me.  Short of going to his mom and dad to try to talk some sense in to him, I don't know what to do here.  I don't want to stoop to that level.  He would never forgive me for running to them to "tattle" on him.  I am at my wit's end here.