?

How is it possible to be this angry and this sad at the same time?

I'm back....FINALLY.  I am so sorry I have neglected this site.  This summer has been far busier than i ever imagined it would be.  There is so much I need to write about but i am thinking this summer entry will have to come in installments.

#1. Nick

Things are good. We saw eachother every other weekend as planned.  However i am broke as a joke because of it. It's ok though.  I think the longest we ever spent apart was 12 days. He moved into his apartment in winona on july 7th and things have been great.  I'm still living at home until Sunday but its been so nice to have him only 2 hours away instead of 6 like he was when he was in Chicago.  We are going to a wedding on sat. and then packing up all my stuff and I move back to winona on sunday and start working there on Tue. I'm exctied but also really nervous.  I'm really nervous about balancing the whole, school, friends and boyfriend thing.  It was easy before because I didn't see him every day so when he would come on weekends I would have work off and my friends would understand that I wanted to spend all my time with him because I didn;t get to see him that much. And before, when I was dating mike it was easy because I didn't really like mike as much so it was easy for me to just hang out with my friends and not hang out with him as much.  I guess we will just have to wait and see how it goes but I am definitely nervous.  I don't want to be that girl that loses all her friends for a guy but at the same time...hanging out with him is so much easier and i have more fun doing nothing with him whereas when I hang out with my girlfriends I just feel like we have to be going out and doing something...we can't just lay around together like Nick and I do. 

#2. Eating

This summer has been tough.  Nick is a very skinny guy and I just feel like I need to be skinny too so people don't look at us and think, "what is that skinny guy doing with that fat girl?" I know it's ridiculous but that's honestly how I feel a lot of the time.  Also, I've got this wedding coming up.  One of my very good friends is getting married and nick and I are going so I really want to look good in my dress and feel beautiful for a night. So needless to say, I'm not doing all that well with the eating stuff but it's been to hot to get out and exercise so I feel like I need to compensate somehow. So stupid. I know. I am working on it.

Well I think that is all I can do for now...more later for sure.

I hope all of you are having great summer and I am sorry I abandoned you for a while.  I hope all is well and I was and am thinking about you all:)

All my papers are done.

Only 3 finals and 2 days until freedom.

Then I will have real time to write.

I promise.

hugs hugs hugs.

He's coming tomorrow.

He's coming tomorrow.

He's coming tomorrow.

Smile.

weekend end

So much to do before finals.

No time for anything else.

Sorry I have been neglecting you all.

I think Nick is coming on Tuesday.

That would be nice.

:)