I was joking with my friends during lunch about this craig's list post ( Missbride also post it on her blog) and they threatened me if I don't answer her questions on my blog, they will no longer read my xanga. So here it goes

THIS APPEARED ON CRAIG'S LIST

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at
least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think
I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get
me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as
I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
restaurants, gyms

Rich men hang out at bars, restaurants and gyms you cannot afford or pronounce. Otherwise, you prob already landed one.

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
feelings

Someone who is not so DUMB honest.

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)

For you, target 60-75 and cancer patients. Or you can put the modern"Beauty and the Beast" in play

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead
gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story
there?

Whats wrong with east village?  Maybe "Plain Janes" give awesome blowjobs, you never know.

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they
hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

You should consider real estate guys too, who may have a brownstone on the Upper east side.

By the way, hedge Fund guys aren't always as wealthy as you think, there are many of them struggling at the $300K poverty line. Please check your resources.

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY

Duh, they marry "Plain Jane"s, but you refuse to be one. I am not sure if you can even hold the girlfriend title

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest
way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front
about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with
services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 432279810

I am sure you can keep his home as clean as a 5 star hotel room but the problem is he already has a maid. 

Please don't take this the wrong way. I am pouring my heart out to tell you all the truth behind it. You see the reality is: most wealthy guys are just as superficial as beautiful women or even worse, they are superficial in every aspect. Therefore he won't be able to stand it when you embarrass him in front of his colleagues. Oh hey, maybe you can pretend you don't speak English!!!!

 **********************************

I am so hot for this guy!!

THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I
see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
cr@ppy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you
suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring
my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my
money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely
that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't
be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense
to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case
you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's
as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful"
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then
we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic "pump and dump."
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
lease, let me know.

This entry is inspired by HouswifeNY

Relax, its only 3 days!

So I lost my phone last thursday (opps I did it again). I haven't called my parents for 3 days, since work has been crazy lately and ...oh right I don't have my phone when i got home. I was planning to call them when I get my new phone on Sat.

Sat morning at 9am, my dad showed up at my apartment.

"Where the hell have you been?" My dad was almost screaming. "Your mom was so worried last night, I took the first train here this morning!!"

Me still half asleep " Errr Dad, I lost my phone, was going to call you later today.'

"No excuse! You could have called from your work, its not good, no call in 3 days! You know how bad it is in Manhattan? What if you get into an accident? We won't even know about it!! " Blah blah for another 20 mins

"Err...Ok i will call you everyday now"

Dad I am 2*, not 18!

Ivy League or Die

My parents have been pressuring me to go to Grad School the moment i stepped out of college. After working for couple of years, they are so afraid that I will give up the whole idea of going to Grad school.

Mom: When are you taking your GRE/GMAT/LSAT? Are you going to apply Law School or MBA?

Me: Hmm, I think I will do *^&$^#%#

Mom: WHAT?? Is that even a major? I didn't bring you to America to study @@#!$@#@

Me: But that is what I want to do mom, and it will help my career. You want me get into Ivy League right? Its easier to get in than Law school or MBA.

Mom: Fine, but you BETTER get accepted. I didn't sell my summer house to pay for that .....What's that major you want to do again? See people don't even know about it! You worked so hard to get in **** in China, too bad you couldn't finish there. Its a shame that you have to repeat undergrad in a State college.

Me: Here we go again.......Mom, get over it! I like my college.

To be honest, I don't give a crap about schools, as long as they have the program that I am interested.

I have a nice Chinese Boy

There is a reason why I don't want to call my parents everyday. Because, we will have the same conversation over and over again.

Mom or Dad: You know you are not getting any younger, don't go out that much, nice men dont' like girls who party too much

Me: I stayed home for 2 weeks, all i did was cooking and reading

M/D: Good girl. Mr.J from our church has a really nice son. He is a doctor, bright future. Would you come home so we can introduce you two?

Me:  NOOOOOOOOO  (No offense but he looks like he has never seen/talked to anyone outside his hospital)

M/D: You are too picky, you will end up with nobody if you don't give nice guys a chance.

Me:  @!#@$@%^@#!@% I got go mom and dad.

Don't you just love my parents? or any other asian parents?