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| aimless ramblingsI used to post on this xanga all the time - it was my first blog. Reading back brings back lots of memories and makes me think about how fluffy I am sometimes. I used to write about things that mattered to me, not only things that went on in my life, but thoughts that went on in my head. Now sometimes I feel as though my head is empty and my mind is moving aimlessly throughout the days, wondering where its going to land next.
So why am I writing this on my xanga? honestly its because no one that I know ever reads this. I feel as though I can come here and ramble, wander, spit, choke, vomit up my thoughts and it won't really matter because people aren't reading it anyway. Does that make sense? Doesn't really matter if it does or not, I suppose, makes sense to me. I'm turning 30 this week. should that scare me? age is just a number, or so they say. can't say that i'm actually afraid or worried about being 30, but there are definitely things in my life that i thought would be different. regrets? i have a few. they aren't really worth thinking about too much. i've been forgiven. thank goodness for grace - i'm glad that i'm finally at a place where i can actually see God's grace and actually receive it well. "holiness is the solution to every problem" ~aaron white. i'm agreeing with this today. | | |
| footprintsOk, so I don't really use this blog anymore. Actually, I never use it - but today, I found out about this cool thing on Xanga where you can see who visited your blog...seriously! That's one thing that blogger definitely does not have. So I saw that someone was reading up about me...heehee...or maybe was just randomly bored at 2:30am and wandered to my Xanga! WHAT?!?!
So there you have it...now what are you waiting for, go to the blog that I actually use!!
www.un-compromising.blogspot.com
Be blessed. | | |
| So I never use this blog page. However I do have so many friends with xanga's at the moment that I will be using my sign in to post comments every now and again.
Should you want to really know what's happening with me, check out my blogspot page. You can get the lowdown there.
www.un-compromising.blogspot.com
Blessings. | | |
| Hello Friends! I thought, that since there was a debate over which blog site was better - xanga or blogspot - I'd check out my old xanga to see if I could choose. I haven't yet, but I may soon....we'll see. =) In the meantime, I'll post here what I posted on my blogger earlier this evening.
Selah
Now watching: Gaither Gospel Hour
So lately I've been feeling a little lonely. I've made the decision to try and not spend any $$ on my weekends to save for my year at the War College. Well, that's proving easier than I thought! Its also causing me to spend a lot of time on my own(mainly on the weekends), which is bringing a lot of lonliness into my life. I'm not used to this lonely feeling, its not something I'm used to. So in that respect I am very lucky. I have come to believe however, that God is giving me all this time to myself so that I will start to spend more of the time I have with him! What a God, he's a sneaky one!!!! You see, its taken me some time to figure this out. That's not 100% true, but I have been diverting the idea for a few weeks. I can't anymore. This time is for me & God and I need to start using the time that I have - to regain the discipline that I tend to lose so easily. In attempting to do so, for the past couple of days I have been reflecting on a passage of scripture that was left for me on a previous post (see 'spent'). The scripture says this: 'I wait quietly before God, for He is my hope. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.' Psalm 62:5-6 OR 'Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; (selah) my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.'
I remember being in high school and having my pastor do a devotional with my church choir. He used this passage of scripture, but focused mostly on the word 'selah'(which appears approx. 73 times in the Psalms). I couldn't remember what it meant, so I did some research. Funnily(is that a word?) enough it doesn't actually have a meaning. There are however, many speculations. I am going to do my best to articulate what I've concluded about the meaning of Selah. After reading, I think it means one of two things: to weigh or to lift up. I think the two actually work together. Look at the 2 verses. If we use 'to weigh,' in these contexts, to weigh the preceding Word of God and wisely consider them. If we use 'to lift up,' it is our hearts which are to be lifted up to consider more solemnly the two truths. Thus connecting the meanings(at least in my brain). I think what I've learned from this is that I need to spend more time reading God's word. Really reading it. From now on I'm going to use this word, Selah, when I am meditating on God's word. As a reminder to weigh and to lift up what he is saying to me. Because he always has something to say - we just need to learn how to listen. Why don't you join me in doing this? I think that in doing so we will find our Father speaking to us, to encourage us, to comfort us, to instruct us, to humble us, to reprove us. 'His power is eternal. His glory is supernal.
When all earth's things have passed away, There'll always be the love of God.' (gotta love the Gaithers!)
Blessings. | | |
| Its been an interesting weekend. I went to an all ages pool hall on Friday night to see one of the guys in my youth group play in a band. It was fun, but I was way old there!! I was pretty sick after that night and haven't exactly decided yet what I think caused it. It was either bad cream cheese on a bagel that I ate or just some sort of virus. Either way, it sucked!!!! I wasn't even sure I'd be able to function enough to drag myself out of bed for Sunday school and church yesterday, but all went well and I was feeling much better then. So Sunday morning came and the youth pastor at my Corps(church) was lookly so sickly in the morning. The biggest problem with that was that we had a youth service later in the evening and she was supposed to preach. There was no way possible she was going to be able to do it - so what do I do??? I offer to do it for her!!!! What was I thinking?!?! There was no way that I'd be able to come up with a sermon in that short a period of time, so I took her's, cut out a bunch of stuff and paraphrased it into my own words. I prayed long and hard yesterday afternoon - and from what the other leaders tell me, all went well. I was relieved. To be honest, I wasn't really nervous and after being up there for a few minutes I really started to enjoy myself. Everyone was listening and laughing...it was a great feeling to be sharing God's word in that way. I think I'll be doing it again! Now that is something I never thought I'd hear myself say!!! God is good.
I also saw the movie - Something's Gotta Give - this weekend. Very funny...the crying part at the end is hilarious! I recommend it. | | |
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