nightmare_fixture's Xanga

Blah.

Sat, 19 Aug 2006 13:26:07 GMT

I got so much catching up to do. If only I didn't screw myself over and fuck up my GPA then I would've been able to get aid this sem, but no, I'm still under probation. Hah. Need to re-take PY-101, get over MA-085, take CO-106 to make up for the 'D' in GE-101 and also re-take SO-101 to get rid of the 'D' (again). My transcript is a damned shame. What?! Not everyone has the brains and the dedication. *pouts I rather be ditzy, airhead-like and be smart rather to have common sense and not be smart.

Emoness needs WATER.

Tue, 15 Aug 2006 11:30:45 GMT

I hit another wall and the aftermath ain't gonna be so easy this time. Who else is to blame but myself to fall in a rut such as this. A complete mess that needs a pick-me-upper, but nothing will ever satisfy. The pain has finally found its way around to a perfectly good fuck-up. Nothing, none. No one. Just nothing will ever to take it away.

And as bad as a druggie/alchie relapses, I have relapsed into my own bad habits. I swear my hands and my imagination have got a mind of their own.

*sings Do we really gotta cry, really gotta lie . . .

---------------
So much for 'not drinking' at a drink-out. Thought I'd be able to pull it off again by just being the designated driver. Turns out I broke my promise and was still the "doubleD"

Mij decided to be a genius once again and held another one at her humble home while the rest of her fam was off-island to celebrate the ending of the Summer and the beginning of hell (fall sem). Heh.

People together again and I'm gonna miss teh long hour hang-outs.

Had a blast.

And we are all victims.

Wed, 21 Jun 2006 11:52:35 GMT

know there was a pact made at the beach, but I seriously forgot. I'm sorry, but things just have to be let out. We or you can try to avoid the drama and distress that idiotic people cause, but the drama will always find its prey. We can't run forever, no. So we shouldn't worry who knows about what and whatnot. Things will only turn into drama if we can't handle things in a civil and more mature manner, ya heard. Its getting really silly, I swear. People just need to get their heads out of their holes.

Anyway, I'm so fucken awake. Matapang anyone? Lol. I guess Friday is fucked over. People's got their own thing going on and shite. I might just stay home because I will be the one ro get mother from work again and its gonna kinda be a waste to go anywhere since I'm gonna have to drive back to Andersen. Whatever.

Umm . . . I can't wait to go to the carnival with my lovelies. Its a date and that whole 'tree people' dinner before Jabot leaves? When fan? I miss everyone. And I just watched LB again. Lol. Watching their grad and atop the entertainment center are pix me and my bro's senior portraits. *sighs

Friday, June 09, 2006

Fri, 09 Jun 2006 22:49:46 GMT

Oh my, what a weekend. It consisted of a sleepover at Reef with people that I love for Betty. Things happened and things were said and there was drama but held within cerain souls. How gay, but for real. Played a few games on the dirtay side. Didn't want to be a "killjoy" so I played along then watched 50 First Dates with Domingo and Jay.

Got second-hand blown (HAHA) and totally gone the first nite, so I was care-free. No regrets overall. Drove back and forth about five to six times to Reef and Del Mar in Dededo because Jay was too damned high or simply forgetful, but all is good. My turn foo!

Betty met a new "CHAD" and chambering was hilarious. Gil almost lost all his nose hair and hook-ups are great. And a little sidenote, Green tea and Jack don't make a good mix. I had tea before the nite arrived then the next morning, DIAHREA. :( There was lots of KFC the second nite and so sorry to those who didn't get much out of the first nite.

But waking up to Jay's snoring face was hella funnay and later his face on my fafa. Had to change my sheets because of his drool and sorry Dar if I moved. *wink But getting all them licks, teases and touches from them was crazy. I ain't no slut, it was a game, but clothing was kept on. Anyway, that's all for now. I love Summer and I don't want it to ever end. But education is key, boys and girls.

Today is . . .

Mon, 22 May 2006 08:03:55 GMT

Monday = boring. Tried to go out, Lyn and I ended up burning gas and mileage driving around asking back and forth what are we gonna do/go. Haha. Hilarious shit. So we ended going to the mall window/phone shopping. I wish that I could shite out 129$ right now to get a refurbished one. I want that new LG AX 4270 phone, but I'm still in love with mine. Haha. Oh how committed. :P

Since school ended I've been going out like crazy and coming home in the early morning of the next day. I got shit from my dad, of course. So I'm gonna try to go back to being a good girl and be home by midnight, but I'm gonna push it to 1AM. *evil laugh Everything has been going good, ,but I need a job, but I don't want one. Haha. I might go job hunting then maybe snorkeling again. Last nite we had ouur BBQ at Gun Beach, it was fun. Did all the camping shit, but cleaning up was a bitch. I saw two shooting stars!! I hope my wishes come true. *sighs

I love my friends, those I hang with and those who will forever be my loves. :D

. . . and the bitch is back.

Mon, 15 May 2006 11:23:24 GMT

I don't know but I'm in a pretty pissy mood. I don't know what the fuck he's trying to pull, but I ain't falling for that shit. He needs to revaluate his decision before I burst the fuck up and make his life a living hell. I'm so mad to the point where my hands are shaking and my face is burning red. If its true, then oh well, but no thanks, and if the other shite is true, then he better be ready to dig his own grave.

You know what?! I'm sick of being so nice, and some people take advantage of me and think I'm made of stone that I won't feel shite because I always say its okay and whatnot. Well, this time it ain't. That's why I like being the bitch, people stay away, but once I'm nice, its over. I'm only good enouh to be used, that I'm not worth anything else.

Eat shit, you fucken bastard! You'll be sorry you even met me, so by all means, push me farther.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Sun, 07 May 2006 13:06:59 GMT

Just some late pictures from Sping break during Potackie's drink out. No I am not drunk, just sweaty &all messy. Haha. Believe it or not, I was the designated driver.

&some random pix dating from Rob's bday to times we just fucked around.

Okay. That's it for now. I need to go to sleep &be up by 7AM to fill up Sally (my car) then head to class. Laters.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Sat, 06 May 2006 09:37:39 GMT

CAUTION: LONG ASS ENTRY . . . YO

Sometimes, although I am grateful, I wish that I am a different person. Being someone else besides myself. To all truth, I am not oh so pleasant to the eyes, I know and I know that you see it. So I guess I'm saying that I would like to be different on the outside, but I'll keep the insides, thanks. My days have gotten darken. My time is running out and so are my choices. Thoughts that use to free-flow are now coming back and attacking me with questions and harsh replies. Claiming insanity is just the best way to go. At times I want to take my anger out on something AND someone. I am glad that I am able to analyze a situation and a decision before acting upon it. To end this depressing side note, I hate myself and I hope the day will come where I see you guys from above. I am proud to say that I am not afraid of death, rather the HOW-WILL-I part does.

-------------------------- I love being with a small group of people, NO DRAMA! But being a part of a GROUP is good. You learn from one another and learn to never make your or their mistakes twice. There are people in this world that need to realize that they are other people in their life that acquire certain treatments. You don't treat someone equally (an exception to respect of course), because everyone isn't the same. Everyone can't take or handle your words the same way your others friends do. You need to adjust your values, you need to accept the fact that you have and are cruel as ever. But it a weird and ironic way, I will always love you no matter what you do or say. No comment.

-------------------------- Well, the nite beforoe yesterday went just well . . . NOT! Once again, drama finds its way to the heart of a mighty good time and plan. I felt sorry for the celebrants; each of them had their own trivial moment. But besides the negativity, the nite consisted of . . .

Getting all glammed up.
Good food at Sakura.
Being called Sam throughout dinner.
Yummay salad!
Taking bula-mula pictures in front of the whole restaurant watching our much entertaining ignorance. *wink
Car pooling
Crashing a 16 year old's bday
Climbing a bunch of steps at Marriot
Talking to store owners
Eating a push-pop &drinking water as desert
Sharing socks = Risk of fungus Bowling with an 11lb. ball = Muscle gain on one arm Bowling like Mama Sang and hitting a strike . . . TWICE = PRICELESS. Dancing with a stranger at Hardrock
Hanging at Justin's still 4AM telling stories and reminiscing [spc?]
Going home to more food on the table

Occured in no order . . . kinda. I left out lots of stuff, becuase its too much shite happened.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Tue, 02 May 2006 00:55:03 GMT

Finally a layout that fits my shite. I wanted to keep the simple one with the flower, but it just wasn't working out. There's gonna be a lot of exerpts from my LJ. But this is my first entry in a really long time. The last time I made an entry, I was still working &uneducated. Now I'm jobless &back at UOG, full-time. I've registered for four classes so far. I decided that I would like to major in Education, either Early Childhood/Elemntary or Special Education. I would like to double major but that's just asking for trouble, plus I'm not so bright; although I wish I was. *sighs

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RANDOM:

Anyway, this Friday is Liz, Jon, Kim &Gie's bday celebration. Its going to be "Prom Relived." Since I didn't get to attend my prom, I mean I did but I just performed . . . this is my time to make it up. So I guess I will dress up &wear my bridesmaid dress once again. I just need to get them dry-cleaned. Hah.

Went ghost hunting the other nite and wrecked the fuck out of my phone, but its okay, in the end it was all worthwhile &funny---but it was not before. Haha. I need a new one, but I want the same one. I love my phone &I will never stop loving it. Lol. I know, I'm weird. I treat my car &my cellphone like they're real. Sometimes innanimate[spc?] objects are my bestfriends. :P

I had fun at Elaina's 1st bday partay. Hehe. Was nice seeing Nat again. Watching Doria model or the whole crowd then the mishap of her *ahem cough. Lol. And then Allen &Tommy going down. Haha. Then Troy atop of Doria. Freakin' priceless, I tell you. *wink I still remember how Mary's face looked yelling at Doria to pick up her shirt. *sighs Even if I didn't get to get all slippery &wet, I enjoyed myself. But not as much as Rob did. She sat down the whole time eating all the candy from the giveaway like a little kid with menustation. She ended up leaking herself. So we had to go home to her the baby changed. &I'm craving for that shredded crab salad. *YUMMmm!

I'll type more when I get home. I'm at the modern language comp lab abusing my rights. :P &awaiting till Rob gets off since I left my car at her house. Long story. I'm avoiding my dad. Hah.

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Sun, 19 Jun 2005 02:02:24 GMT

Hey hey hey. Lol. Havan't been online in quite some time now. My comp has a virus and I got a job. Ahaha. &I'm not gonna attend Summer classes at UOG anymore. Not much has happened. Haven't really been out. Just workin hard for the monaay. Hah. I'm helping pay for my car. My parents need help with money, so I'm thinking about selling at the flea market again. It isn't so bad you know. Makes good money selling your junk that other people would consider their belongings in the longrun. So for you who know where I work, come visit me before the third of July --- before Queen bee comes back.

Well, talk to you guys later. Its Father's Day &I haven't gotten my dad anything except a card. I might not get my check till next month since my boss is on vacation. Love and miss you guys!!

Ai, Mary!! When the hell is your baby shower, umbe. I tried to visit you at home, but you're never home, but I'm scared to park there cause someone might fokai my face. I miss you and I haven't seen your baby yet. Whaa!