| i wish things could go to the way they used to be.....simple and sweet...Things were perfect. Why does time change people? Why do people change when time passes them by? When will the time come when we can just all "hang out" and just have fun? Sure some people have changed for the better..And some have changed for the worse..And there are those who haven't changed at all..Don't you just want to get away?? From people, friends, family, just everything? I found a way....I go to the top of parking garages and just admire the view...Just think of all the fun and simple times...Just find time to enjoy life. To be able to be "on top of the world" is the greatest feeling of all for me..Up there, you can just look at the world pass you by, but not hear anyone else..No gossip, no complaints, no compliments, no nothing..Here, it's just you and your soul..You can just feel yourself as a whole..You...nature...the whole universe seems to be yours. Sitting on the ledge with legs hanging off the side and ciggerette in hand...it's perfect. Sure some say it's a little awkward that i do these things..They just don't understand how my mind works..Some guys will see a girl and say "Daymns, noice ass." I say, "daymns, noice hair." Or "man, she got some nice lips." I remember when i was in Portland and being at the Japanese Garden, (which everyone should go one day) I felt as if i was home..Walking around the Zen Gardens, the lakes, and listening to the waterfall.
I would like things to go back to the way the used to be..Simple and sweet..I don't care for the things that others want. I don't care for a fast car, I don't care for taking a girl out to an expensive resteraunt and wasting all my money for an hour or two of her time. (even though i would do it anyways) If it was possible, I would rather take someone along the river and just talk..enjoy the conversation..learn more about her...Use it as a way to wine down the night...It would be a night of endless love..A night i would never want to end..A night not to be wasted..
I want things to go back to the way they used to be..Simple and sweet..I want to be able to "hang out" with all my friends..All at once..every single one..All i want is to see everyone i care for all at once, even if some of them don't get along..I want this so bad because time is unforgiving, death is merceless, and all you can do is regret. I don't want to regret anything..I want to be able to do all the things i wanted to do..I don't want to be 30 and think back to high school, wondering what would have happend if I tried to hook up with that girl...If anything, I would rather die young and happy. Instead of old, in my death bed, and full of regret. I have already accomplished so much in these past years that I'm ready to make a new goal list..I don't want that list to consist of a goal reading "Don't die." I want a goal on the list to read "Fuck it and be happy."
I just want things to go back to the way they used to be...simple and sweet..That's not that difficult of a request..or is it? I don't know where all of this came from..Or do I? Maybe it was from the time when I overdosed and came close to death..Maybe it was when I was in the Hospital and was told that I had a small stoke that cut off some of my memories..Maybe..Just maybe I can change this before time ends..I just don't want to be losing anybody over something dumb..I don't want to have enemies...I don't want anybody to be put down and not have anyone bring them back up..If someone was hurt, I would rather be them..Have me be the hurt one and have them be the happiest person ever..Sorry I'm not superman, but i try..I don't know who is all going to be reading this..I know that some won't read this, but still comment on it..I know that some of you can relate..Like it or not, I've changed..I admit that..I'm a changed person..All i want is things to go back to the way they used to be...Simple and sweet....
-nicke- |
