Golden Eyes.

I tried to write a song today, but my heart seems distracted
My hand waits for the lyrics, but my heart can’t form the words i cry
A mile a minute, my emotions run
Through a heart so cracked i don’t know what i feel

But,
I know I’ll live without you babe, i don’t need your touch tonight
I’m gunna move on, gunna let go
Cause you showed me your heart, and darlin you’re not the person i loved

They say this dark tunnel always leads to light in the end
But from where i’m standing all i see is the dark of the night
And If you were here before, you would’ve wiped away these tears by now
Cause baby ya used to stare at me, thinking i couldn’t see
A mile a minute, my emotions run
Through a heart so cracked i don’t know what i feel

Still,
I know I’ll live without you babe, i don’t need your touch tonight
I’m gunna move on, gunna let go
Cause you showed me your heart, and darlin you’re not the person i

And yet here i lay with your stupid face stuck in my head again,
And your golden eyes are looking at me that way they once did,
And these chills from my head to my toes torture my soul

Oh, I thought i could live, i thought i didn’t need
I thought i was gunna go
Oh no,
I thought i could live without you babe, i didn’t want your touch tonight
I was gunna move on, gunna let go
Cause you showed me your heart, and darlin you’re not the person i loved
No not the person i loved
Oh darlin you’re not the person i loved

To Teach a Child.

You said you’d be here for me
Anytime i called
But its no surprise you’re not here at all

Now i realize
You don’t even know what truth is
All you know is your, your lies

For once can you just open up your heart
And tell it like, tell it like it is
Cause what you’re mumbling now
Isn’t what your eyes are telling mine

You’ve got a lot to learn
Yeah you’ve got a lot to learn

Because we all make mistakes
it’s how we, how we handle them
That makes all the difference

Yeah i know my world will never be perfect
And baby you should know
your world is not all about you

Open your eyes child to the world around you
See the pain and the lies hear those cries
Beyond the walls of your secluded mind

Heal those blind eyes
Yeah heal those blind eyes

My world may not be your world
Well hey, at least i’m moving on
But this world is still our world
So suck it up and become a part of it
Just for once suck it up
Just for once become a part of it

Yeah you’ve got a lot to learn
Babe you’ve got a lot to learn
Child, I don’t think you’ll ever learn
What it is you’ve got to learn

Lone Moon.

When I was young and so naive
I read books of love and harmony
But the world taught me such a thing could never be
And yet I painted a picture of You in my mind
So no one else could see I was
Holding onto a hope I knew would never be

But You, are the one I’ve been waiting for all this time
And You, are the light of the world in my eyes
And I know, when all else fades into the sunset
I will still have the moon, I will still have You

Wherever I go, I feel Your presence here with me
Oh I can feel Your gentle touch of love
It’s in the light of the day, warming my neck
The soft breeze of the night, playing with my hair
As each day goes on this love grows (more and more)
And even apart, I will always know

That You, are the one I’ve been waiting for all this time
And You, are the light of the world in my eyes
And I know, when all else fades into the sunset
I will still have the moon, I will still have You

This is like no other
It’s as constant as the moon
Even if you cannot see it, it is there
Just waiting to save you from this darkness

There’s always hope in the heart, but hope alone suffers
Yet faith can free the heart, and bring this hope back to life
I’m so undeserving, still I’ll let Your endless love in

Cause You, are the one I’ve been waiting for all this time
You, are the light of the world in my eyes
I know, when all else fades into the sunset
I will still have the moon, I will still have You

And You, are the light of the day guiding my way
And You, are the lone moon shining in this endless black sky

Wow.  I have just been reading through all my old entries, and talk about humiliating.  I can't believe how young and immature I sound, but then again everyone has to be annoying and dramatic at some point in their lives.  It is an unspoken natural law. 

I decided to write in another entry - for the heck of it.  Who knows, maybe I will update it now and then with random thoughts.  Not a single sane soul uses Xanga anymore - that I know of- so really I am here to talk to myself and sort ideas.  Well I never said I was normal.


A lot has changed since my last entries;  I am a completely different person:

Sports: I still enjoy them and thrive on them all year round.  As of now, I play volleyball, basketball, and track & field.  I still love to run - the pain and focus while I push myself helps to take away everything else in the world.  The feeling of complete relaxation when it is all over is like a drug.  Soccer and field hockey are still enjoyable for me, but I can only play three sports.
Music & the Arts: I crave the feeling and passion in music and art.  They express emotion better than anyone could speak.  I love to play my guitar and write my own songs and poems.  Words are always running through my head; they are so simple with so much meaning in them. [I like to read.] Photography is the best way to capture the moment and share beauty forever.  A picture can have so much more meaning to it than a memory and figures in a frame.  You have to take in its entire layout - the colors, positioning, lighting, and every detail of emotion from corner to corner.  I am always searching for new ideas - to be creative and abstract.  Designing clothes and jewelry is another fad of mine; I love fashion and shopping for things that no one else will have.

I am very independent [I am happy with being me], I'm a vegetarian, and I love variety. I am pretty outgoing, but I can be shy and reserved at times - it depends.  I am very easygoing, and don't have a problem with anyone.  People and equality mean a lot to me; I try to love everyone.  Most importantly, I am a born again Christian.  My ambition is to travel all over the world, somehow.  I love New York City, England, and Australia.  I  would die for my friends and family. They mean the world to me.


&& Here's to being random:
I also like..
--Colors.
--Watching the Sunset.
--Laughing until I cry.
--Rambling.
--Surprises.
--Cheap & Funny Gifts.
--Inside Jokes.
--Helping others, unnoticed.
--Giving free massages.
--Taking pictures.
--Thinking.
--Dreaming.
--Strolling down memory lane.
--Layers.
--Chucks & Boots.
--Knee-high socks.
--Vintage.
--Earrings & Big Rings.
--Singing in the Shower.
--The first Spring rain.
--Winter's first snow.
--Milk & Cookies.
--Horseback riding.
--Animals.
--Babysitting.
--Running on the Beach.
--Dancing in the Rain.
--Thunderstorms.
--Classical movies.
--Pride & Prejudice.
--British accents.
--Alfred Hitchcock movies.

Tonight was the most fun I have had in a LONG time!!!! Seriously, it was a blast... you really missed out if you didn't go... I love my life... annnd of course ALL my friends



Oh, and HAPPY (Belated) BIRTHDAY MARLEE!!!! Luv ya...