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| a pragmatic self assessment i'm - - extremely confrontational (i can get really 'in your face')
- a baker as a means of de-stressing
- efficient & needs everything to be efficient
- always a giver (its really hard for me to receive)
- a complete stubborn mule
- an anchor (which apparently, to my surprise, this has been known as my bad trait)
- f u l l of pride and strangely enough, really low self worth
- phenomenal at organizing just about anything
- messy, but not dirty
- a lover of truth
- never a visionary of the bigger picture- i focus on the details. (i make lists, not goals.)
- a salty type of person, not sweet. i prefer chips over chocolate.
- a believer that music translates messages from the heart
- loyal beyond belief
- brutally honest, at times, lacking any tact whatsoever
- overly concerned, completely empathetic
- a laugher. especially at inappropriate times. i'm just trying to understand myself a little better. this is a compilation that i have gathered over the years. | | |
| In the spring of 1519 a Spanish fleet set sail
Cortes told his sailors this mission must not fail
On the eastern shore of Mexico they landed with great dreams
But the hardships of the new world make them restless and weak
Quietly they whispered, "Let's sail back to the life we knew"
But the one who led them there was saying
Burn the ships!!!!! we're here to stay
There's no way we could go back
Now that we've come this far by faith
Burn the ships, we've passed the point of no return
Our life is here
So let the ships burn
In the spring of new beginnings a searching heart set sail
Looking for a new life and a love that would not fail
On the shores of grace and mercy we landed with great joy
But an enemy was waiting to steal, kill, and destroy
Quietly he whispers, "Go back to the life you knew"
But the one who led us here is saying Burn the ships!!!!! we're here to stay
There's no way we could go back
Now that we've come this far by faith
Burn the ships, we've passed the point of no return
Our life is here
So let the ships burn
Nobody said it would be easy
But the one who brought us here
Is never gonna leave us alone >>> 100 days | | |
| free falling (by tom petty, but covered by mayer on this dvd) is an awesome song. does anyone else like it when you go to the beauty salon and they tell you that they've cut off all the damaged hair and what's remaining is all healthy and beautiful?  yea, me too.  stolen from tiff.
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| i haven't been able to sleep for awhile.
ppl tell me that you can't sleep if you have something on your mind. tiff says i haven't been letting myself think in a long time. she's probably right~ distractions have helped me progress these past 2 years, that is, if progress is measured by how busy you are and how little sleep you get. i've heard somewhere that ppl are so incredibly resilient. and how awesome that is. and how brilliant we human beings are. blah. i had just the opposite thought for some time; that i am not that strong, that i cannot endure- and not only me, but everyone as a whole. legions of ppl scattered on the earth, not one who is able to stand on their own two feet and sustain their life on their own. if anything, these bodies, these lives, are actually great growing masses of pure, 100%, untainted weakness. and it passes onto generations of even more weakness. sigh- it's neverending. powerless. always in need of something to keep it going - the need for distractions, for food, for rest, for knowledge. need for relationships for stupid heart support. need for prayer. look at all this need! ---always needing. always feeding. how do you become stronger? ...what makes someone strong? how can i become strong. i told myself this morning that i must be in a funk. because for the past week or so, i've been sitting on this powerless, unsubstantial me. and today, at work, while i was blankly staring at my computer, it hit me. the basics, marian. --- me, being weak, is not a problem. it is actually a solution. because it shows me that i am in need of Someone greater- to need Him and to feed on Him. He gives me rest and strength and love and hope and He is constant and never failing. so prone to forget. that without Him, this life is nothing. Him, the source of Life. blah. why is this still not satisfying, though?!!! i want more. .....i want so much more.
don't give up. can't give up. | | |
| bleh, can't sleep.
so i will post pics.
cause everyone loves pics. 
here is summer so far- 
janet puts smileys on my face.  
this is max. good dog, max. 
dogless ppl should not be allowed in dog parks!  
come back soon! 
my 2 year old nephew, baby josh, who lives in seattle.  
baby josh is king of the bed. haha. DOMINATION. 
they have yellow cabs in seattle, too! thought it was a ny thing. 
if you know ju, you know this pic is funny- haha.  
unni took us to the space needle. hey man, reflection pics are always cool- 
whale watching in the middle of nowhere.  GO YANKEES! 
i think kimoon was the only one who really liked oysters, but we gulped those suckas down anyway.  
apparently, its always cloudy. haha 
cool acapella group singing in front of the very first starbucks! 
chipmunks are small and not like squirrels AT ALL!  
shake shack is a must for summer dinner.  
babysat cutie pies. 
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