Currently Listening Riot! By Paramore see related

Wow...it's been a long time.

Life is difficult. I just do not get it.

Me and Caleb have been going out for 21/2 months now.

I love him=]

He took my first kiss=]

So many things have happened, i could never say it all on here. I guess that i'm just so overly confused and i don't get life.

I recently started cutting myself.

I don't know why, but I do.

Here is a poem i wrote:

One mistake, it's all away.
One thing wrong, sing a sad song.
Leaves you bruises, use excuses.
It hurt too much to feel the pain.
You cry in the rain, so no-one knows.
You see your scars, then wonder why it's so hard to just let go.
You don't know how you ended up here, you shed a million more tears.
You're so sensitive to everything said,
because of the words put in your head.
You flinch when touched, no matter who,
Because of the abuse you've been through.
You fake a smile, a hidden file, so no-one will figure.
You fake a laugh, everything is wack,
You whisper, "I can't survive one more time."
You go to sleep, the memories repeat
everytime you close your eyes.
You're afraid to smile, afraid to cry, afraid to die or go another mile...

Hello Sunshine =]

Life is going great. I'm super happy now=]

Me and caleb are really good friends and i'm even his top #1 on myspace.

Best thing that's happened to me in a looooong time!

Church is going good. I'm in the band now at church.

My favorite couple [josh and christi] are doing good =]

School still sucks....but hey, that's life.

I love Hollister now and that's what most of my wardrobe is...Hollister...lol.

Ya that's pretty much it.

ILY GUYS!

Hey Guys,

well i guess i SHUD update...so i got a myspace FINALLY! i'm soooo happy! so nothing has really happened lately i guess...i don't want hallstrom to start...ughhh. i hate algebra with a passion!!!! haha. sooo....well i g2g cause i don't feel like typing. lolz. so comment me lots and message me! ily!!!

*emily---*ann---*

                                        There you stand. i look at you and all those feelings

come back.

              I used to think the world of you.

                                           til you broke my heart in two.

Why would you.

                But then you say you're sorry let's be friends....

                                                              Now all those feelings come back again...

You are my Starts in the night sky my hands to hold on tight...my smile to bring joy to my eyes. You're my sunshine. my warmth when i'm cold my new when i'm old my start in the end ur my sunshine....

         You don't see what you do to me

But all my friends no i'm still in love with you....

                                        was i just asnother girl? do you think of me 2?

Lets give love...another try

You are my stars in the night sky my hands to hold on tight...my smile to bring joy to my eyes. You're my sunshine. My warmth when i'm cold my new when i'm old my start in the end ur my sunshine.....

                                         Let's give  love love another try.

                                        Hello Sunshine,

                            Ok, so lately, life has been really rough,                                           

It's hard to know who to trust.....

                                                          And who not too.....                                              

It's especially hard to stay true to a friend.....

behind their back....I've definitely learned that. I've always had problems staying true to someone behind their back.....

                                                       Life is so complicated at times....it's hard not to just give up....

                What keeps us going????

                              Why Jesus does....

                  It says that he will never give us too much to the point where we can't handle it....

                                       Sometimes i feel like it does happen tho, life is stressful with Hw, school, boys, parents, friends, everything....

      Matt Nyberg, our sunday school teacher and junior high leader talked yesterday at church about how we often forget about God and don't see him....

          It's because we're just too busy....? Yes we are sometimes, but WE make ourselves busy. I know that whenever i have free time i'm like i have to find something to do! Weather it's read a book, listen to my ipod, text, go on the computer go hang out with friends....Why don't we take that time to talk to God? i think that this week for my goal i'm going to try to spend more time praying and reading the bible....especially with the long christmas break coming up...each one of us shud try to see god. don't ignore him. if he ignored us, where wud we be? i don't even want to THINK about that...we just need to give an effort, to try a little harder...after what jesus did for us...i think we can do that....