these are the times we all wish for..the moment when less means so much more..

  whats been going on eyy?. well its been a while since ive xangaed..never really had time to sit down and bond with my computer. but lets just say..i'm sleeping heavily..dreaming bout how my fairytale world..could not be disturbed. i just got home from camp. and i'm telling you..i will never ever forget it. one of the most memorable times of my life. aside from everything else. being open and gaining trust. theres nothing like the feeling of being able to run to two great people..and knowing that they'll always make you smile..when you need it the most...thank you for making my days gone past much easier for me to over come. i dont know what i'd be thinking. doing or how i would be without the advice you've given me. and therefore im much thankful for the friendship that ive created with you two. v-j.//..days way before..so difficult to find yourself happy or even the true meaning of being "okay" and theres nothing wrong. ever since ive changed myself around and stopped myself from being around such negativity. my life's been nothing but a fairytale. ever since i had the balls to actually tell the person how i really feel. without feeling bad or guilty. mean and bitchy. my lifes been easier. ever since LESS started to mean so much MORE to me..life's been a fantasy..and i dont think i'll ever bring myself to the state where the negative atmosphere could ever harm me ever again. sometimes not giving a fuck is a good thing..and i stopped giving a fuck way before the true hurtful words could reach me. Thank God./ for the people who yet haven't learned that talking shit is not what life's all about. you have my sympathy. i wonder when growing up will be a priority in your lives. i wonder if it will ever even be a consideration to you. i wonder. and all i am still left with is to..wonder./ i can write a song about the things people and places that have touched me the most. and i'm only down to one thing.. the people who have hurted me by saying harmful things or even pretending to take my friendship as a great appreciation to them. those people make my song which those words add up to make my strength. and to those people who have nothing better to do. but make someone else's life miserable. i thank you..because as you continue to do so. your also continuing to push the courage they have in them a bit further. and in return you'll really see what your lifes about./only expose your deep dark secrets to the one you ONLY have..you are the wind beneath my winds..you are my thoughts..my everything. you are the reason why..i keep on trying..

 it's amazing how you can speak right to my heart..without saying a word..you can light up the dark..

        this weather//chills.

      goodmOrning america!. its about 8:45 in the morning and i am wiDe awake. about an hour ago i was on the phone with my boyfriend and of course he makes my day great..a great start at least. uhh yah. its part ll..where is this parade going to start and end anywho?.

   part ONE yesterday. my o-p/oniON/ it could have been better.. more people?. better sound system. uh huh. the acts were great.. sucks when their trying to sing and all you hear is alkdjfl;ksdhflaksjdstatic. uhh the weather could have been brighter. literally. ..running into people you thought you'd never ever see again."its killing me gently, silently i'm dying inside.

        really special. really and truly. i love robert.

its early in the morning and i have no clue of where my boyfriend may be. oh well. hAH. philippine fair today. am i going?. who damn noes! lemme see here. lately. i've been trying to raise my grades and concentrate on not ditching one class. its for my good. ;] and besides. if i do successfully attend each and every CLASS. i get a handsome reward from val! LOL. yaaay!? uhh me see here.

      ....as jeffrey says. i have that new eww i hate you look. which in fact. i DONT! damn him. lets just say its a new "wtf look" simply because. i ask myself. wtf?!. LOL. and that stupid bitch eww i dont like her right now. shes gay. well. with what i have to say. uhh yah.

     oh! and YOU that wont be a problem if we dont KAYeyePEE. fuck man. i was hoping you would say that. shiet. "live life without regrets..A DIFFERENT STORY" ummm. okay. thats all.

   school is almost over. graduation here i come! ;]. watching it at least. kay. byeee!

           i have nothing but useless bullshit to say. so therefore, i leave you with..Nevermind.

whoa. its been awhile since ive xangaed..fuckin laziness kicking in. well. lately my lifes been gay..like always. shiet. i wanna leave. eff! umm. this saturday i went to saturday school which was complete hell. yes yes yes it was!..i'm never ditching again..oh and not to add. i hate ms. tanner. umm. alot of bs have been arising. wait yah?. umm. theres only three people who know what i'm talkin about..

           ..usually if i hear shit talking. i'd get soo mad that i couldn't hold my anger in..and that i wanna do something about it. but now. its nothing but complete bullshit. well at least i hope it is. how many times has this happened?. where theres always at least one fuckin girl hating because of the person i'm with. HAH. fuckin jealously?. Maybe. or i see it like this because i know their history?. maybe because he didn't get with you?. maybe because you got dissed?. maybe because he will never EVER like you AGAIN?. get over it!! whats in the past is in the past.. so why the fUCK are you so damn angry that hes with ME?. isn't that some shit..hating me because you want the one i HAVE. HAHAHAH. funny somewhat. but damn. pleaasssse! all your shit talking is not gonna get him to be with you. so save yourself some time and fuck off. save your breath. and save all of us the laughter.

UGH WHATEVER THE FUCK. I DONT KNOW. I DONT CARE. SADUKRA'LKFH';KVJNSKJFDA';SKJF'SKLJFLKS'JFDLA'KSJF'SKLDJFLKASDJFLKSDJF

hemakesmereallyhappy. and i like it. Alot.

     i understand that people may have questions and comments towards the relationship i have with robert. some people dont like it. some people dont give flying fuck about it..and its hard to choose whether i'm making the right choices or if i'm not..i wanna be with him. i like him alot. he makes me really happy. really. but then there are those who make being with him soo difficult. what is it?. why?. why not?. wheres the problem? i mean yes, people sometimes are filled in about our problems. just because we need to let it out sometimes. and we do so at wrong places. around WRONG people..its like living in two worlds. one with the one that makes me happy. and another with people who make me think twice about the things i'm choosing to do!. can't we all just get along? i mean. no doubt about it. i trust robert and i'm not afraid of losing him. because i know i wont. but see. if i think that. if i choose to believe that. i feel like i lose certain people as well. why can't it all just be fit into ONE?. why can't we just all live without no bullshit stopping us from doing anything we want..why can't we all just live in a big happy world..because its not.