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oik
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Birthday: 12/22/1982
Gender: Male
Interests: being outdoors, eating junk food, games
Expertise: being indecisive
Occupation: social worker
Message: message me
Member Since:
11/25/2003
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| "These are my people"I moved to LA 3.5 years ago, and I thought I developed a heart for the city and it's inhabitants during LAUP. I thought I developed it when I gained an intellectual community at UCLA, an activist community at LTSC, and a spiritual community at Newsong. I thought I developed it working with families who are in desperate need for something more. I realized today that I don't think I have. Not yet.
Work is hard. School was hard, but as a student I was in my element. Still, it's nice getting paid, but the hands-on stuff can be exhausting. Especially when it means working around children who've been abused, families who don't want you there, and a system that requires so much paperwork that you can't get anything done. But with all of that, I think I like it... or at least I appreciate it. I like that everyday brings new challenges. I like that my boss is accommodating yet firm. I like that sometimes I do get to make lives better for these kids. But I don't get how people do this without Jesus. Every time I come up with a hard case I need to pray... but I don't always have time to. And when I don't, it gets harder. But when I do (or when I get my accountability partner to intercede) then it gets better, not necessarily easier but definitely better. Jesus is amazing. He brings hope, strength, patience, endurance, peace. For me, for the kids, for the families. Jesus is here in LA... but I forget that so quickly.
The last few months have been hard at work, but good spiritually and socially. Having community in LA is going to make it harder to move. I don't intend to do it anytime soon, but I never intended to get stuck here of all places. But God leads in mysterious ways. Sometimes he calls us out of community and back into the uncomfortable unknown. Sometimes he calls out the people that help define the community as we know it. But sometimes he also allows things to stay the same. All of this leads to growth. So many paths leading to Jesus. Crazy.
Anyway, back to the topic at hand. I was working out with Art today and as I was staring out the window of 24, I saw the lights of all the houses, the lights of the street lights on the 405, the lights of the cars driving by, the lights of the neon signs, and even the lights of some airplanes. For someone who doesn't typically appreciate the beauty of cities, and who comments about light pollution ruining the starry view, it was odd because I found it beautiful. And then I felt like God was saying "these are my people." I wanted to know what that meant, and even know I'm just making things up as I write... But I know this: God loves the city and its inhabitants. He cares about social justice and the poor kids I work with. He cares about community and the people that I've begun to make connections with. He cares about the beauty created directly by Him and manifested in nature, as well as the beauty inspired by Him and developed by men. God cares.
I wish I could always see through His eyes. I wish I could always be at peace. Sadly, I will forget and I will probably regress to my selfish, narrow-minded view of this city with its smog, traffic, crowds, and high maintenance. But today is different. Today I appreciate what Jesus has given me in this city. Today I appreciate my friends, my job, my education, my church, my small group, my connection to Him. Today I am grateful.
I know everyone writes about this song, but it's a good one, because it reminds me of how much I have to still grow and how much I still have to relinquish to God... From the Inside Out/Desde Mi Interior (for some reason I really like the Spanish version).
A thousand times I've failed
Still Your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
I'm caught in Your grace
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
Your will above all else
My purpose remains
The art of losing myself
In bringing You praise
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
In my heart and my soul
Lord I give You control
Consume me from the inside out
Lord let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love you from the inside out
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out | | |
| CommunitySo today was the last night for my (old) small group to meet as a whole. We ate, we prayed, we worshiped, we reminisced, and we planned for the future. It was good. The DORCs are splitting. I mean "multiplying." And as the multiply, I'm going to finally leave them. It's been a good year, and since I started 2007 with the DORCs it's nice to end 2007 with them as well.
So, DORCs stands for Dependent On Real Community, and they really do live up to their name. The DORCs do a good job of taking care of their own but they're also inclusive and new people become pretty active within a few weeks. The DORCs pray for one another, hang out with one another, and so many of them serve at church. I'm going to miss it. But it's time for me to move on. I've been on core for 5000 for almost 6 months (yes for half a year I was off-again, on-again with two small groups), and it surprised me how attached I've gotten to this group as well. I also enjoy that this group isn't replacing the DORCs, because it's so different it can't. It's like new friends, they don't replace the old ones, they just get added on.
I hosted the 5000 holiday party last Friday and the DORCs holiday party last Saturday. It was interesting because the first one felt like a real holiday party, we had turkey, ham, cake, apple cider, egg nog, jello, salad, a few nice white elephant gifts, and of course mafia. It was organized, energetic, and fun, but it left me exhausted. The second one was more like a family gathering, we had KFC, Panda Express, a few pies, left overs, late people, multiple conversations, wii boxing, scrabble, and cheap cheap white elephant gifts. It was unorganized, laid back, and fun, and it left me feeling comfortable. They were both great but one felt like young friends hanging out, the other like old family. So they fulfilled different needs at different stages of my spiritual life.
Anyway, I like my new small group. It's been hard being on core. The conflicts remind me of going on missions. The leading reminds me of being a TA AND a student organizer. But the people are great. People ask great questions, we have awesome Bible studies, there's a commitment to prayer, there's a desire for vulnerability, hey I even got a great accountability partner out of the group!
Where's all this leading to? I was just thinking about my spiritual communities and I'm just so thankful to God for leading me to these groups and for the mentors, peers, and young ones he's introduced me to along the way. God has definitely provided new things with every community and each one has taught me new things and even when the community fades, I'm glad for the friendships forged and the growth I gained.
I think I've had 6 real spiritual communities, by real I mean impactful. In college I had CBF/Pathway and InterVarsity, which together gave me a foundation based on the Word, intentional community, and social justice with a Jesus perspective. In Hawaii I had KCF/Good Stuff with cultural connections, peer relationships, and leadership opportunities. And in LA I had MSG, DORCs, and now 5000, who've given me role models, serving opportunities, community of prayer, and a challenge to love others. Jesus is awesome, and I can't wait to see what he does with the DORCs and everyone who has been touched (directly or indirectly) by the DORCs, including myself and the new small group.
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| ThailandSo, if you've been reading our blog, you'll notice that we definitely had a lot more internet access than expected in Koh Yao. Our team leader has been a little blog happy, but it's great to see all the pictures online, even if you don't want to read much. After Koh Yao the pictures get scarce since internet was less readily available, but we went to Phuket then Udon Thani for a vision trip to
see what God and SDRF (the organization we've been working for) are
doing in this country so far, and so different from the States.
Anyway, we just got back to LA and Thailand was an amazing experience. We had some conflict, some reconciliation, some hard work, and a lot of fun and growth as a team.
Since pictures are worth a thousand words, here are some photos of our trip from the airport till today.
My small groups at the airport send-off (above: 5000, below: DORCs)
The team in Bangkok (sorry, I'm too lazy to upload a right side up version of the photo)
Some fellow MSWs that teach for SDRF in Bangkok over the summer
Our bathroom in Koh Yao. Yup it's right next to the shower with no divider. And yup, that bucket is to flush the toilet.
Suzie on the bridge her team built last year in Koh Yao
The field we worked in before the fence was built
The groupers that we're building the fence for. (it'll be a nursery for the baby fish)
When it rains, it pours... and it poured almost every night (with quite a lightning show) so I needed to protect my hat with a hat cap
The barbed wire fence we built are the white spokes in the background. May not look like much but it was great.
My favorite class admiring their art they created as we taught Art
My favorite student Ussalam with some of his projects (I've got a story about this kid, but I'll save it for later).
Sunset after a hard day at work
Me eating crab... there wasn't much choice other than seafood... =P
Doing touristy things in Phuket
Spending plenty time at the airport. Now we can sleep anywhere!
Preview of things to come (our trip to Udon Thani where SDRF has a tilapia farm) - these are the baby fish.
A school in Udon that works with SDRF. It's so poor that the principal paid out of pocket to fix that roof. They don't even have enough chairs for all the students, and they only get about 250 baht/day for school lunches when they need closer to 700 (at least).
Shopping at a mall in Bangkok. I gotta work on the pose, but here's some Asian movie ad
We went to some restaurant in Bangkok called Cabbages & Condoms (note what the dress is made of). It's a great idea to spread awareness of safe sex and the AIDs problem. A portion of the money goes to the women who are trying to get out of prostitution... At least that's what I think I heard. You can probably google it.
Last but not least on our last day in Bangkok we were riding the train back to the hotel and I hear this LOUD familiar laughter. It was a great couple seconds before we had to part.
There's so much more to share, but I'm exhausted, so maybe another time.
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| Answered Prayers!Jesus is amazing! Below are just a few things that went wrong... and the way that Jesus answered them. A little faith (and patience) goes a long way.
1) Work: It was supposed to start July 27. Yesterday I found out I got pushed back to late August due to some processing errors!
2) Funds: Just last week my team was only at 80 something percent of our budget. On Friday we found out we're at 102%!
3) Passport: Also as of last week I hadn't received my passport. On Thursday I received it in the mail.
4) Funds (again): The church sent me a check for our cash advance for all the logistics (housing, cabs, food, etc.) but they accidentally sent it to my uncle's place in Sunnyvale. Today, they wired it to my bank account and I was able to withdraw the funds!
5) Bonus: I got to talk to a lot of my friends and relatives (both Christian and not) about my faith and why I'm going on this trip. Great way for missions to begin even here at home (both LA & Hawaii).
Crazy how all of our logistical prayers were answered less than a week before heading off to Thailand. Of course we can still use more prayers. So now that logistics are out of the way, please pray for:
1) Good team dynamics
2) Safety - physical (malaria, typhoid, diarrhea, etc.) & spiritual (exhaustion, doubt, warfare, etc.)
3) the people we'll be working with (teaching kids & helping the adults build a fishpond)
That's all I can think of right now, but we leave tomorrow, so pray for other things if you can think of it. Again, we'll have a team blog if you want to follow us as we update via internet cafes (when available).
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| MissionsI'm leaving for Thailand on Wednesday, but I'm a little nervous because I still haven't heard from DCFS (the place I'm going to start working at when I return). Earlier, they told me I may have to start in the middle of the missions trip (subsequently cutting my trip short). But as of today, they haven't given me any notice yet as to whether I need to start at the end of July or the end of August. Please pray that it's the latter so that I can work without distraction in Thailand. Also, when I'm gone we have a team blog if anyone's interested: http://newsonglathailandteam.blogspot.com/
Kinda nervous, but very excited to see what God's going to do for (hopefully) two full weeks.
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