wow i cannot explain how deeply i despise those little dogs with the beyond-annoying, high-pitched barks that sound like a cat yelping after getting its tail stepped on, except over and over and over (and over). how can anyone stand to own one?

i feel similarly about infants. they freak me out. what with their creepy gurgling and creepy jerky-motion limb-flailing and creepy face-making and creepy not-quite-eye-contact cuz, i dont know, they don't have control of their muscles quite yet or something, so they're like those creepy old men with lazy eyes and you're not quite sure they're talking to you when they are. plus they're all wrinkly and need their every need attended to at every fucking moment. this is not to mention the crying, which is almost as bad as the yelping dogs.

there was a baby shower at work yesterday for a co-worker, who brought in her 2 mo. old baby. i did not hold it. for all of the afforementioned reasons. also i was positive i'd drop it. and even if not, it's the only baby in the room and the focus of the party and therefore, people would be looking at me (well, the baby, but me WITH the baby), which i dislike. and also, it would start screaming immediately, i know it would, and then everyone would see that i will be a horrible mother.

i have way way way less patience when it comes to children birth to....mmm...four these days. i'm waiting for it to go away. but what if it never does?

i feel like i have written this post before...

that is all.