I'm back from newfoundland now (duh). I got back last sunday. We came back in the middle of a snow storm. Scary ass airplane ride. Everyone looked so calm.. I feel like a freak. I was panicking the whole flight pretty much. Oh well. Whatever, I will live. Maybe.

I stayed with Whitney at a girl named Megan's house. I don't think Megan liked us much. She was realy nice though. She reminded me of Lauren. She even looks like her. Anyhoo, after we arrived on thursday, we spent some very good quality ackward silence time at Megan's house, before returning to the Roncalli gym to be beaten by a score of 92-35. Good times. The game sucked ass. Afterwords was fun though. We got screeched in to be newfies. We kissed the cod, bit the head off a cadling, drank syrup, ate tack bread and had to talk nonsense gibberish. It was fun though.

The next morning, we ended up going to school (me and whit), alone. It was boring. When everyone else came, it was fun though. Then Lib started with the killing herself jokes. I try not to be overly sensitive... but that definatly hit a few notes. I wanted to shake her. She was just kidding, and I admit, at times it was comical, but its a hard topic to constantly joke about. Its a touchy subject in my past experiences, and I didn't like it much. Anyhoo, we played another game, and lost again. That night, we went over to Kate's house (she was one of the girls on the Roncalli team). The Roncalli team came over too. It was really really fun (surprisingly). I thought it would be weird, but it felt like I'd known them for longer than I really have. Megan and Chelsea were definatly funny as hell! (they were from the Roncalli team). Amanda made a lasting impression on them too I guess. She was amusing that night. All we did was sit around and talk, all... 30 some of us. That night Whitney and I got to talk too. I didn't know her at all before, and it was weird, but now.. its not.

On Saturday, we played another game, and watched a whole crap load of games. I found it amusing, but I guess the others didn't. Pretty much everyone talked about rather dying then being there. Lib was definatly the worst again. There were a couple of us that weren't as happy about it though I think. We went to a dance that night. It was also funnish, but I find myself standing by and watching. I'm not like them. I'll never be like them. I think too much. When I look at people, I can't just look at them, make fun of them and walk away. I see too much. I can't help it. Its hard. People were partying and having a good time, while I just watched. watched and watched. I want to be like them. Why am I the way I am? Whats wrong with me? Why can't people see the real me? I look at them, and I see what I want to be. They don't try and help me fit in because they think I'm either shy, stuck up or a prep. I'm not any of those. I hate it. I wish they would help me/