This Thursday marks another milestone in my life. I'll turn 35. But the thing is that I really don't feel that age. As a matter of fact, physically I'm in better shape now that I ever was in my 20's. I feel as if my life's just begun, I know who I am as a person and know what I want in life -- more or less anyway. All in all, I'm more balanced with myself and I feel like belonging where I'm at.

I'm happy to be the age I am. I don't miss being younger, I don't yearn to be more mature either. Simply because life happens now. The past has shaped me into the person I am today and I'm free to choose my path as it comes. Though I've made decisions in life I might not have made had I known then what I know now. But I don't regret making those decision at the time because it wouldn't change a thing now. Besides, too often we let the past dictate how we perceive the present and what we expect from the future instead of choosing our path without prejudice.

That in mind, I'll just see what Thursday brings. I haven't made any special plans because why celebrate a number that doesn't feel like sticking to me just yet.

It's been a while without a true outlet to pour my heart and soul into... Facebook's great for a quick fix but all it does is to add more to your plate, more burden to handle in the long run. I may or may not return. Regardless, I need my therapy again...

Still Alive and Kickin' -- And Doing Good on the Side

Gosh! I've definitely been M.I.A for way too long. I suppose, it's about time to correct that wrong.

A little over a year ago I was at crossroads of my life. The spring of 2008 wasn't the easiest of my life with me being laid off, my Mom being laid off, too and my grandma being in bad shape. But we all pulled through the hard times. For me getting a new job and moving to Helsinki was something that really made me a new person -- or it actually made me find the person in me again that I really am.

Last summer came and went. I enjoyed my time in Helsinki but when I went to "home" in Turku, I felt numb, exhausted and like I was suffocating. It occurred to me that it was time to make a move that should've been made a long time ago but didn't happen due to lots of things. J. and I broke up in the beginning of September '08. Even though I was the one to bring the issue up, it was mutual in the end. We are still in good terms and keep in touch occasionally. After all, we were together for over 10 years and even though the love died the friendship remained.

So, I've been single since last fall. I've made tons of new friends. I've felt good while being able to breath freely and do as I please. The only one I really have to take care and take into consideration is Cati who, by the way, turned 4 this Saturday on the 4th. But I love having her around, she's my baby after all.

There's also another major change in my life worth mentioning. Those of you who are my friends on Facebook are well aware of this. Over the Christmas break it finally occurred to me that it was the time to make major changes in the way of my living. In the beginning of 2009 I joined a gym and was about to start training again when my back begged to differ. I went to see a doctor and got my back X-rayed. It appears that I've got structural defect of sort in my lumbar section as I've got one extra vertebrae and this L6 also has spondylolysis and spondylolisthesis. The only way to keep my back in shape is to have strong abs and back muscles.

Once my back was okay, I started to train again. Short after starting I hired a personal trainer to help me get on right track. I listed weight loss, exercising becoming way of life and just gaining permanent results as my goals upon start. I started training with enthusiasm and really altered my eating habits and all according to my personal trainer's recommendations. My weight started to drop quite fast, at the rate of 1 kg per week at first. Now, after about six months I've lost at least 13 kg (I've still got the about 7 more to go). My dress size is 2-3 sizes smaller. As a matter of fact, I've had to renew my entire wardrobe as almost everything had gotten too big on me. Frankly, I don't think I've ever been this size as an adult. Maybe when I was 15 or so... And the best part is that exercising and doing sports have become an important part of my life and way of living.

Also, I've started to play golf on regular basis this summer. As a matter fact, I did so well last round that my HCP will drop by 10.

All in all, life's good. Better than it has been in years.

Rare Exports, Inc.
(Disclaimer: The following video clips may seem disturbing to some as they include some gore scenes. Even though Christmas related, they aren't very Christmas-y as a whole.)

Computers

A little while ago I got myself a new laptop because the old one was acting... Well, old. Also, I had trouble accessing Xanga with it for a reason or the other. Which was one of the reasons I stayed MIA for as long as I did.

Anyway, this new PC that I've got has Windows Vista Home Premium as operating system. And I don't like it all that much. I so miss having XP... For a reason or the other, I managed to get this computer of mine corrupted so that the screen would freeze with just stripes of what I was working on. And this was within minutes of rebooting. The only way I was able to get anything done trying to solve the problem was to sign in on safe mode and do my magic. Well, what helped eventually was to restore the system to the stage it was a few days ago -- just to be on the safe side. Luckily I hadn't made any major installations or other alterations during this time.

Of course I ran a full scan on my virus detector safeguarding software to make sure there weren't any viruses or such present. It appears there's none at the moment.

This whole trouble actually started with me trying to install Photoshop and other components from the Master Collection. Vista somehow rejected those. Bummer! Now, I need to figure out what to do. Maybe just get the old version I had on my old computer installed instead of trying to get the newest... And of course I'm talking about all legal versions of these software.

What though worked smoothly earlier this week was installing the the WLAN for home. I got sick of being at the other end of the cable at all time so I figure I just go get a WLAN box and get it working. Besides, now I'm one step closer on getting PS3 for myself plus home theater systems etc... One piece at the time.

Oh, and forget about Firefox, Google Chrome is my new friend what comes to browsers. However, I've got a few others handy as well since Chrome is not supported by all web sites yet. So, I currently have IE, Opera, Firefox and Chrome at hand.

So, I've been all techie this weekend. Next we'll have our new teams Xmas party on Friday and I'm going out with the girls on Saturday. That should keep me busy...

Also, I'll have Cati over for a while, over Xmas, I think. YAY!