oxXIRRiSiStaBleNaIXxo's Xanga

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Tue, 29 May 2007 03:26:35 GMT

i finally realized today that i am afraid of change...i dont want things to changed from the way it is...but i know things are going to change nomatter what..

Friday, May 18, 2007

Fri, 18 May 2007 00:56:09 GMT

OVER THE PAST WEEK I BEEN KEEPING MY DISTANCE FROM EVERYONE I DIDNT EVEN REALIZE TILL THE BF BROUGHT IT TO MY ATTENTION. I WAS KINDA STRESSED OFF OF SKEWL & EVERYTHING I DONT KNOW WHAT IM GONNA DO NEXT YEAR.. ITS SO HARD TO DECIDED I DONT WANT ANYTHING TO CHANGE ..I LIKE THINGS THE WAY THEY ARE NOW ...EVERYTHING IS REALLY GOOD FOR ME. THIS YEAR I BEEN BLESSED WITH MANY THINGS..IM CLOSER TO MY FAMILY , GOT OVER A STUPID REALTIONSHIP/ MISTAKE AND MOST OF ALL GOT TO KNOW MY BESTFRIEND A LIL BIT MORE ..IN CASE YOU DONT KNOW ITS MY BF.. WE BEEN TOGETHER FOR ALMOST 7 MONTHS NOW AND I HAVE TO ADMIT I AM REALLY HAPPY. HE MAY NOT BE THE BEST PERSON IN THE WORLD BUT HE GOT A GOOD HEAD ON HIS SHOLDER AND HE KNOWS WHERE HE WANTS TO GET IN LIFE AND UNLIKE MOST PEOPLE HES GOING FOR IT. I NEVER REALIZED IT TILL NOW BUT ALL THOSE RELATIONSHIPS I HAD IN THE PAST WAS GOOD BUT I KNEW SOMEHOW IT WASSNT WHAT I WANT. IT WAS WHAT I WANT AT THE MOMENT BUT THINGS CHANGE.NOW I WANT SOMEONE WHO I CAN SPEND MY LIFE WITH SOMEONE WHO CAN MAKE SOMETHING OF THEMSELVES AND CAN TAKE CARE OF ME.I LOVE THE WAY MY LIFE IS GOING NOW IM CURRENTLY LOOKING FOR A NEW JOB AND JUST WAITING FOR THE BIG MOVE AND TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHATS HAPPENING NEXT.OVER ALL I THANK GOD FOR EVERYTHING THAT HES DONE FOR ME THIS YEAR AND IM SO GREATFUL FOR EVERYTHING. I HOPE THINGS WILL GET SO MUCH BETTER.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Sat, 10 Feb 2007 01:24:26 GMT

I Don't wanna see your face
I Don't wanna hear your name
I don't want a thing just stay away baby
Don't wanna know if you're alright
Or what your doin' with your life
Don't wanna hear you say
You'll just stay in touch maybe
I'll get by just fine
And if you're goin' then darlin'
Good bye , Good bye
 
[Chorus:]
Don't call me in the middle of the night no more
Don't expect me to be there
Don't think that it will be as it was before
Don't think that i care
I'm not over you yet
and i don't wanna be your friend
 
I'll forget we ever met
I'll forget i ever let
Ever let you into this heart of mine baby..
You just gotta let me be
You gotta keep away from me
Coz' all i wanna do is be free from you baby
Don't you come around
And say you still care
About me..just go now , go now
 
[Chorus:]
Don't call me in the middle of the night no more
Don't expect me to be there
Don't think that it will be as it was before
Don't think that i care
I'm not over you yet
and i don't wanna be your friend
 
[Bridge:]
You take it too casually..
But baby it's killing me...yeah...
 
Don't call me in the middle of the night no more
Don't expect me to be there
Don't think that it will be as it was before
No Baby
Don't call me in the middle of the night no more
I'm not over you yet..
And i don't wanna be your friend
Don't call me ..Don't come around
I don't wanna be your friend



..was just bored...

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Wed, 17 Jan 2007 03:19:42 GMT

and I'm not jealous, no I'm not
Ooh, ooh, I just want everything she's got
Ooh, ooh, you look at her so amazed
I remember way back when you used to look at me that way

What makes her so much better than me (so much better than me)
What makes her just everything that I can never be
What makes her your every dream and fantasy
Because I can remember when it was me

That made you smile (me)
That made you laugh (me)
Me that made you happier than you have ever been, oh me
That was your world (me)
Your perfect girl
Nothing about me has changed
That's why I'm here wondering

What makes her so much better than me (what makes her so much better than me)
What makes her just everything that I can never be
What makes her your every dream and fantasy
Because I can remember when it was me

stuck on that song right now....
sometimes i wish i could go back and find out the real reason why it had to end but its too late now i guess..all dats left to do is move on and forget.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Mon, 18 Dec 2006 18:38:04 GMT

well...as it goes...i guess im going to san jo.skewls gonna good i hope it is lol...i havent been online for a while been busy with getting skewl ready for next fall and work and shit...needa find an apartment and everything parents say they gonna pay for rent and shit so yea...things with the bf is still great..everything is really good..been hella busy and stuff been spending hella money and stuff....dam i cant believe high skewl is about to be over..everythings changing so fast i feel like im going crazy trying to keep up with it but its ok i guess everything is set up already..oh well loving life and getting it right this time.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Tue, 12 Dec 2006 05:15:38 GMT

happy holidays everyone...lol...anyways um..wow things are really great right now..friends are the best loving the family and most of all bf completes me...been spending a lot of time thinking about how imma live my life...im growing up and nothing i do can change it. dam i cant believe this year is finally gone and soon imma be out of skewl in the real world.things are really great for me..im actually enjoying my life going to skewl i work now and on weekends bf and friends..i pretty much got it all together right now..everythings all good .bfs moving to san jo cause hes gonna go to sj state& im still thinking about weather i wanna go there with him or not..oops i forgot to update everyone on the bf thing lol...well as i finally came to realize YOU DONT CHASE GUYS YOU REPLACE THEM..for the past couples of months i was talking to this guy and after a few months we finally made it official and well we beent ogether for almost 2 months now and hes making me happy.anyways i have no regrets i am who i am today because of those mistakes im willing to learn from them.i really learned a lot .. the most important thing i learned is that you should never hold grudges&never care what others say cause now a days most of the things you hear issnt true anyways.so better off being urself and doing the things u wanna do then sitting around trying to figure out whats true or not.

Friday, December 08, 2006

Fri, 08 Dec 2006 03:26:06 GMT

i <3 him so freakin much.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Tue, 05 Dec 2006 21:25:24 GMT

One day you're going to want that girl. That girl that knew she wasn't perfect, but tried to be perfect for you. The girl that believed the scraps of you she was given were worth it, because something was better than nothing. That girl who wanted nothing more than to be there for you, and loving you was the only way she could. The girl who sees your flaws, but values them as much as your strengths, that girl who still can't bring herself to hate you, even though sometimes you probably deserve it. That girl who saw past your pretty eyes and treasured parts of you that no one else has ever appreciated. The girl who realizes she may never have your heart, but will carry the image of you in hers forever, the girl that sees this and still loves you. The girl that should have you, but doesn't even know she deserves it.

Friday, December 01, 2006

Fri, 01 Dec 2006 14:46:42 GMT

i hate fightthing with him but somehow it always happens this time i dont know weather its over or not but imma make the best of it..no need for childish games and no need to cry fuck all dat imature shit life goes on i guess...no need for un necessary dramma on the good side life is good so no point in letting him ruin it for me.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Thu, 09 Nov 2006 14:13:16 GMT

LIFE IS GOOD.