cheryl is tired and annoyed.

ive gotten back math and eap so far. not exactly that great:(

its just the first week of sch and hoi and psych essay topics are out already! theres just mounting stress as the year progresses. ahh i hate sch. however much better this is than jc. now i feel like going back to spore. i was so torn btw the 2 places when i was back there for my 2 week hols. im sure all the people here who went back know what i mean. or most. its like you dont belong anywhere. anyway im back here now whether or not i want to be.

i should be reading 'March' right now but its freaking boring. why do they give us such sucky lit books??

my stupid phone decided to screw up on me today. i cant make calls or send msgs now.

my internet speed is like that of a snail. maybe even slower. if thats even possible.

technology is such a bitch.

im gonna be consistent with my work this term and start working on my essays earlier and not procrastinate for weeks.

i really need to read march.

yes i do realise this whole post was rather incoherent.

ive been much too lazy to blog as u probably can tell. haha:P

its my 6th day back in spore! goodness, how time flies. ive hardly done anything at all.

hung out at hr's house on sunday. (this is supposed to be a detailed post cos cheet posted the phtos so im supposed to do the typing so i shall try. i warn you beforehand that its gonna be boring.) we sat by the pond for a really long time talking, while cheet wet the entire edge of the pond and tried to move aside all the stones to see if a cat would pop out cos apparently a cat mysteriously appeared there out of nowhere before. and she wanted to feed the fish krispy kremes and candy. which, of course, hr disallowed. although i dont think anything would have happened to them considering the fact that they were perfectly fine after consuming the popcorn we fed them previously :D i dont know why but we always seem to have the urge to feed her fish anything and everything at hand. ok so anw, we camwhored and ... and camwhored. (photos on cheet's blog)

vivo with the lovely 2 girls on monday. we hardly shopped at all. as far as i can rmb. i was rather stoned. moved to town after a while.(and after hr's several attempts to try to get us to go to sentosa which failed bcos i detest the sun) chilled at starbucks. for. a long while. far east, met kim. millenia. dance:D i was soooo bad. i was struggling with the choreo cos this was the 3rd week they've been doing this choreo and so i couldnt get the front part :( frustrating. i havent danced in ages and i realised that i actually really miss it. i can only go for one more class before i go back!!!!:(:(:(:( damnnnnnn. i should stop being so lazy when i go back and maybe get off my fat ass to go to classes.

tuesday...errr... i cant rmb what i did. (i highly suspect that im suffering from memory loss. i dont seem to be able to rmb a lot of things lately)

wednesday. mambo with joyce manda n ling! phuture was sold out:( we were so bored at zouk we changed location and moved to arena then MOS after a while.

thursday was homebody day:)

friday. lunched with janet. shopped for a bit. shes like the best ever. seriously. love her! hahaha.  met the mother then dinner with the parents. town has seem to become really boring. really really.

talked to rena just now! they went up to the mountains and apparently ppl were celebrating christmas. how wierd is that! hahahaha its so random. but actually kinda cool. i miss you rena lee!!!! wish you were here:( and have fun over there! i'll see you in a week:D

i made a shocking discovery today.

i could really use a break right now. im so tired i feel like just giving up.

if only all these would stop, then maybe everything would be clear for once. its a viscous cycle. inescapable. and all you can do is succumb.

ive always just assumed it was a clear path ahead. but as i walk ahead, i find myself walking into comeplete darkness.

sometimes we tend to overthink things. minor trivial matters that should not even be the focus of life. and we end up stressing ourselves so much that we wonder why we put ourselves in such misery. its really too complicating. too much for our minds to fathom. or for mine at least.

tonight was.... enriching? in a way. i guess. its somewhat comforting to know that ur not alone in certain aspects of life. i sometimes get the feeling its just me.

eap

lit essay

math

accounting

psych

im heavily broken and i dont know what to do cant you see that im chocking and i cant even move when theres nothing left to say what can you do im heavily broken and i dont know what to do

thanks for being there and just listening :) and im glad you opened up:)

lit essay

eap

math

accounting

psych

AIRPORT

time just flies by here in melbourne. its alrd the lat week of sch and exams start on sat. its been crazy lately. the emotional rollercoasters, assignments, and issues that im dealing with. drivng me nuts. im working on lit right now and its looking like its gonna exceed the word count by  A LOT. damn. i cant wait till im done with this essay.

it kinda scares me how close the day is. i dont know why. i thought id be so excited but im having doubts right now. it'll be wierd, i think. in a bad way unfortunately. some things are just too hard to face and thats why chose to run away. its like a slap in the face. bringing me back to reality. running was never an option but a temporary measure. but i guess i just was hoping against all hopes. i suppose its better seeing it now than later. if i could stop time. i would. or even turn it back. and do it all over again. differently.

it happened today. much sooner than i had expected.

its starting to haunt me again. eating me up inside.