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| So now I can get facebook at camp but no livejournal. The computers are
kind of nitpicky. But, I don't really have time to update there anyway.
I have the night off currently and am feeling a little bit guilty for
not being at camp-even though I should not feel that way.
I left
just before a crisis situation. A kid got sick and pooped all over the
bathroom and himself. He cleaned himself up but had called his mom to
come pick him up. He was refusing to see the nurse...I didn't have to
deal with it but feel bad for the counselors that did.
My job
really is not that difficult. I feel strange being in a directors role
and am feeling slightly uncertain of my role because it is so
undefined. But, I'm figuring it out as things go on and as the summer
continues I will be able to add more and more things to the program
that will hopefully be beneficial.
The last couple of days
have been great. The first day the campers were here was rough. The
male counselors especially were just not on the ball. It wasn't
horrible, but people were 10 minutes late to activities, letting
campers break the rules, and most importantly-a counselor lost a key
and I was the last to know. It wasn't awful but could have been better,
and during the evening meeting I said so. Anyways, afterwards I felt
bad because people took it personally-especially the girls, and the
current director was upset about what I had said. I don't know-I think
what I said needed to be done, and maybe I could have done it less
harshly...but then again I'm not that harsh really am I. I don't know.
I suppose I could have phrased it differently.
I guess I need to
get back into the mode of working with "normal" people again as opposed
to gang members and ex convicts. But I don't even think that was it.
I'm over this particular situation I suppose-it's over and it's a new
day. I just feel like I can't really step to the plate right now
because the old director is here adn any change I propose is shot down
rather quickly. I think it's a matter of pride for him-and also
difficult for him to see something change when he has done it a
different way for so long. We'll see how this goes I suppose.
Thinking
about it now, I suppose I'm not really over the situation that happened
the first day. I need to emotionally recover from it I believe.
Basically, all of the counselors knew that one of the counselors had
lost his key that opens any door on campus. Well, they knew the right
thing to do was come to the directors and didn't...I understand from
their perspective they were protecting the person that lost the key.
However-I wish I would have known so we could have handled the
situation better. Plus, now I'm constantly wondering who I can really
trust. Not so much with the camp stuff but with friendship stuff as
well-because getting to know people is as important as the work things
going on right now. I don't even know if I'm making sense right now. I
need to get over this. Quick.
Training week was great. Playing
games with teh counselors and getting to know them for who they are was
fantastic. And I hope to spend lots of time with them as the summer
goes on. Saturday night I had dinner with Demir, which was nice...it
was weird to be with someone that I hadn't seen since college. Although
college feels like yesterday I also realize that it was basically a
lifetime ago. And I've transitioned twice since then-to chicago, and to
here-and thinking about all of those different worlds at once brought
about some strange emotions.
The kids are here this week. There
are only 39 here which is basically nothing. Next session we will have
over 80 which is going to be quite a transition and hopefully won't be
too insane for me. We have a lot of Mexican kids coming which will be
fun because I am able to use my spanish with them.
Tomorrow we
are ordering supplies. I'm super excited about ordering the huge
twister board for 30 people! :) And some other stuff too.
We
have this adorable kid here this week that speaks no English. (He's
Korean). The process of communicating with him has been difficult but
not impossible-and he's picking up English as the week goes on.
I
went surfing during training week. It was problematic because I'm
scared of the ocean but I decided to be brave and try. The first time I
got up on my knees. But the next time somehow I managed to get the cord
wrapped around my neck. And the third time, too. And trust me, being
strangled by a cord while you are being pushed towards the bottom of
the ocean is quite scary. Now I'm even more scared.
This entry
is incredibly disjointed. I really like the area. I love the camp, the
counselors are fantastic just working out some trust issues coming from
both directions and looking forward to being able to make my own
changes. And looking forward to seeing Jesse at the end of the summer,
obviously. I really want to prove myself this summer. I want to do well
at this job, for myself, to have a success story-to prove to myself I
can do what I love. I won't be as good at it as the person before me
but I should do alright. I just need to keep my head up and enjoy the
beach as much as I can. | | |
| The counselors arrived yesterday. I can't get on facebook from camp (it's blocked since this is a school I guess) so I suppose I may be using my journal more. It's strange being the American in a group of English and Australians. It's also strange being in charge of a group that already knows each other. The group dynamics are already built. Everyone does seem to get along really well and work well together-so I suppose we'll see how this goes. I miss Jesse and my St. Louis friends. And Amanda, too. But, I think I can survive here on the beach. | | |
| Oh yeah, a few other things.
1) I have a queen bed. I've never had a queen bed in my life. Interestingly enough...they gave me twin sheets because they don't have any sheets for a twin bed.
2) I also have my own laundry machine and dryer. I've never had that before either. No need for quarters or anything.
3) It's going to be hard to be vegetarian here. There is a salad bar, but it is slim pickings. They do have tuna fish and peanut butter always out, but that will get old and quick. Today for lunch they had chicken, rice and veggies. So I had rice, veggies, and a salad. And the veggies were yucky frozen ones. Hopefully I'll last all summer.
I miss everyone from home and wish you all could be experiencing this with me.
| | |
| Hello everyone-I'm not sure how often I'll have internet access so I
just wanted to write some thoughts about what is going on here.
I
made it to San Diego. My flights were both quite bumpy, but I survived
them both, and read a book along the way. It's called "Our America" and
is about two young boys living in the projects on South Side Chicago.
It's an easy read, and quite a good, and yet sad book.
The
camp is beautiful. There are flowers everywhere. The camp has a
somewhat strange feel because it is an all boys military school during
the year, but during the summer they have an academic program and a
sports camp for both boys and girls. I'm in charge of the sports
program. There are six weeks total, and one of the weeks is a surf
camp.
My overall feeling of the camp is relaxed. I gather from
the materials and the office staff that they are pretty go with the
flow. I'm not sure whether I like it or not, but I suppose it will make
my job a bit easier. I went through some staff and camper files today.
It was fun, I suppose-but it's difficult to learn about a person by
reading some paperwork.
The only person here right now around my
age is Angie, the office secretary. We had dinner last night-she seems
to be nice. Hopefully she'll be able to make friends with some of the
counselors-she won't have as much interaction with them as I will, so
hopefully she can hang out with us some. Tomorrow the rest of the staff
comes-it should be interesting to meet them. Hopefully all goes well.
They are all coming from London/Australia and two from around the U.S.
The
people here are extremely friendly. I am in a coffee shop right now and
have struck up conversations about 4 random people. That would never
happen in St. Louis or Chicago. It's a very friendly feel. There is
also a band playing outside at a nearby restaurant. It's pretty crazy.
As
far as how I'm feeling right now, I think this is going to be a good
experience. I was unsure until I entered this coffee shop which is
fantastic. The people of Carlsbad seem very nice. But, I'm missing
home. I'm also feeling like I'm crazy for taking this job and doubting
my ability to truely do this well. Hopefully I'll be able to get my act
together and plan some great programs.
Anyways, this post is
pretty dry so I'll end it now. There's too many people in this coffee
shop for me to really think clearly. Lots of noise. | | |
| my. apartment. flooded. again.
i. don't. think. i. can. live. in. a. freezing. wet. and. smelly. apartment. for. another. day.
i. am. getting. crabby. (and. sick. too.)
this. better. get. fixed. soon.
annoying. and. dumb. | | |
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