reinerachel's Xanga

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Thu, 26 Jul 2007 22:51:27 GMT

Tomorrow means I'll have been around on this planet for about 19 years.

Tomorrow I get up before 7, and
tomorrow I go to class all day and after that,
tomorrow I drive 3 hours to DC to visit Uncle Cecil and Aunt Lydia for the weekend.

And the whole weekend is going to be my birthday, and last weekend, when my mom came and visited me, it was my birthday as well (and the best birthday present in the world). Today in between classes I was telling one of the other girls what I would do if I were home for my birthday instead of in a French immersion program. They were all wonderful things, and right now I'd rather be with my family than anyplace in the world. But all of the things I'd do at home are things that I did with my mom this last weekend, or I will do soon. So maybe my birthday is a little less "special" - but every day means something more.

I'm more tired than usual today and I can't keep all my verb tenses straight in either language and I need to go to bed, but I felt like I needed to say that I feel like I've made more than my share of mistakes in 19 years, but I very much want to be a vessel now if God will have me, and I know He will. I thought it was important to say that. And I think it's odd that it took a totally foreign environment and foreign language to capsize me back into where I should be. but you know

Tomorrow je verrai la vie en rose.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Wed, 04 Jul 2007 15:32:02 GMT

week-end dernier ...
I went to DC and visited my aunt and uncle and had an even more amazing time than I thought was possible. In fact, it was so amazing that I think the word amazing is being an imposter trying to describe it.
hier ...
I took. another. exam. And then we had a little ceremony where we pledged to "speak french and only french for the remainder of the institute." ohhh joy.

but since classes got out early, I had time. to myself. So I decided to go see a movie, and since theatres in Charlottesville are a little on the odd side, the only movie I could swing was Pirates 3. Which I actually enjoyed. In front of me in the ticket line was a group of kids - probably 10 or 11 or maybe 12 - some of them siblings and some of them not. One little boy was telling his sister how he wanted popcorn very badly but had only saved up exactly enough money for the movie. Thanks to be a member of the glorious "regal" movie theatre "club" thing, they give me "perks." The perks are always free popcorn. I don't really like movie theatre popcorn. But this time I redeemed my free popcorn stub and gave it to the little boy and he was happy, and I was very happy. I should do more randomly kind things, I think. it's good for the soul.

aujordhui...
I bought clothes. =) At old navy. =) because I'm a girl and haven't shopped in a while. And I'm being rescued from spending the 4th going to the "red white and wasted" party or bumming around by myself by the Mullaneys, who just moved here and are very kind.

(smile because I think that if you smile for very long you realize all you have to be happy about.)

"She was beautiful. She was eating gumdrops."

Monday, June 25, 2007

Mon, 25 Jun 2007 16:49:49 GMT

Today is one of those days when I just want to walk out and fling my arms around the world. The humidity is high and it's as if the air is wrapping its arms around me. To some people it may be stifling, to my hair it may be an invitation to expand, but I think it's lovely.

This morning I took the final exam that signifies the end of French 101. I think it went alright. Even if it didn't, I know I'm learning, and I love that rare feeling I get when I'm randomly happy just to be learning for the sake of it.

(the only negative note is that I woke up 3 or 4 times last night with French dilemmas in my head. gah.)

And my mother sent me a package, and it had ugly comfortable shoes (which I'm in need of because my feet are cut in about 5 different places because of my flipflops - I can't seem to find a comfortable, non-cutting pair) and notepads because I was running out, and laundry quarters, and a new starbucks water bottle. I love (j'adore) packages more than ... well, more than most things besides actually seeing the person who sends them. Sunshine in a box.

"The settled happiness and security which we all desire, God withholds from us by the very nature of the world: but joy, pleasure, and merriment, He has scattered broadcast.
We are never safe, but we have plenty of fun, and some ecstasy.
It is not hard to see why. The security we crave would teach us to rest our hearts in this world and oppose an obstacle to our return to God:
a few moments of happy love, a landscape, a symphony, a merry meeting with our friends, a bathe or a football match, have no such tendency. Our Father refreshes us on the journey with some pleasant inns, but will not encourage us to mistake them for

home."

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Thu, 21 Jun 2007 22:22:32 GMT

ok, so I think I messed up the gender and number with those countries in the last post, but I just hit my wall and can't remember what I did wrong, although I, being the dork that I am, did realize what was wrong and figured out how to fix it the morning after I last posted.

so.
today.
I kind of lost it for a brief amount of time about irregular verbs. One of the professors prefers the socratic method, which I love, and normally I work really hard so I know the answers and I'm ok with being put on the spot. Today he randomly threw the conjugation of the irregular verb aller at me and I conjugated and then he said something confusing about the pronunciation of "vais" and I thought I did it wrong when actually I did it right and then I got it all mixed up and he kept calling on me again and again and I couldn't remember how to do it right and it was horrible and I was stupid and everyone was watching.

It's fine to not know the answer, I just try to make sure it doesn't happen to me because I have this little pride thing going on. I hate "people thinking" I'm stupid. So I called my mom and cried until she got me to explain what was wrong, at which point I stopped crying because I realized I didn't have anything about which to be crying. And then some of the other French students were nice to me later and assured me that really, I am getting it.

there's just _so_ much. We're almost done with French 101 and we're only on our 2nd week (3 credits in 2 weeks?!) And they throw something new at us and I'm just starting to rote memorize, just starting to grasp, and there's something else, and I feel like I cannot catch up.

And I keep waking up correcting mental mistakes in French still. I'm dreaming in French, for heaven's sake.

ok, enough about french. I'm going to go take a shower. My shampoo doesn't care about verbs.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Tue, 19 Jun 2007 22:08:14 GMT

So exam 1 is over, and I did pretty well. Just well enough that I don't feel discouraged but also have some clear ideas of things to focus on more - a happy medium. I am, however, going to bed with a headache most nights and usually wake up around 3 a.m. with some French grammatical dilemma spending in my head.

I am told these things are natural.

Also, we've started (informally) playing football some nights with the other language houses. We were supposed to play les russes tonight, but they weren't ready, so we ended up combining forced with l'italiens (ironic, I know) against les mexiques. Yes, I played. No, I didn't mess up anything. No, I didn't particularly help anything either. (but at least I tried!) No, we didn't win. It was a tie and then it got dark.

buuut ... if you don't mind slightly odd videos, watch this one of the infamous la coupe de boule.

- (also, my amazing aunt is taking me to see Phantom at the Kennedy Center in two weeks. I hate the movie but love the musical. I am excited.)

-- (oh, and I bought my first french cd, and I actually highly recommend it)

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Sat, 16 Jun 2007 11:30:20 GMT

So my first week at the UVA is basically done, and I've done 4 days of classes, and Monday is our first unit (yes unit) exam.

Some things are very hard: classes are 8 hours a day, the closest anything (cafeteria) is a 15 minute walk, everything else is further. But I like walking. It's very different, and some nights I go to bed having barely memorized everything I need to memorize and barely being able to breathe. Sometimes I get tired of always streaming "France Info" (France's version of NPR) and reading my news in French. But I like it, even if I don't have time to keep up with people like I'd like.

---

more importantly:

marla. just. won. nationals. in. LD.

I am ... :insert ecstatic looking grins here:

she is ... :insert all adjectives in english and french for "amazing" here:

Monday, June 11, 2007

Mon, 11 Jun 2007 10:45:56 GMT

Cell phone charger: solved. Yay for Target.
Car: transient. After dying at every stoplight between here and the Ford dealership, it's in being [hopefully] fixed.
Room: moved into. Also, very small and ugly. But I have a room all to myself.
UVA: huge. The campus is beautiful, I've gotten lost a lot, and the dorms are u-g-l-y. No observations about the people yet, but everybody seems nice. There are a few things to get used to. Like having a guy RA. And ... scary bathrooms. But it'll do, pig, it'll do.

Pictures soon maybe. Orientation tonight. More discoveringness.

"One day Alice came to a fork in the road and saw a Cheshire cat in a tree.
'Which road do I take?'
she asked.
'Where do you want to go?'
was his response.
'I don't know,'
Alice answered.
'Then,'
said the cat,
'it doesn't matter.'"

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Sun, 10 Jun 2007 00:10:33 GMT

I am now in a hotel in charlottesville, va. My dad and I are watching something about the Yankees. We met some nice people outside of the Bonefish Grill tonight.

I move into my dorm tomorrow and find out all kinds of interesting things (like if I have a roommate) because unlike PHC, which tends to micromanage, UVA takes an annoyingly hands-off show up and move in during these 2 hours or ... something (not even "or else").

In the short time since we've been in Virginia, I have managed to lose my cell phone charger and thus cell phone capabilities, my 3 year old car has somehow managed to want to die and idle and have some sort of unidentified problems, and I have dragged my dad around Target while deliberating on purchases (shampoo for curly hair or frizzy hair? which kind of spatula? where are the dishclothes? which size refrigerator?) in which he was incredibly patient and actually found the lotion aisle for me.

By the next time I post, I will be living on the most beautiful campus ever and will hopefully have resolved cell phone and car situation. And I probably will have remember something I should've bought at Target but didn't.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 23:13:39 GMT

Tomorrow I fly back out to Virginia to spend the whole summer learning French. I'm working on being excited. Mostly, I'm kind of scared and very much don't want to leave home. But I have to take a step, and then another step, and eventually I'll be there.

I think I just don't like uncertainty so well.

"for I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord. "plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you a hope
and a future."

Thursday, May 31, 2007

Thu, 31 May 2007 21:40:54 GMT

I'm so out of practice with this whole xanga posting thing. With a lot of normal life things, really. But I can and might and maybe will relearn. But for now, comments are not enabled because I'm too scared that my fear that people don't actually read or care about what I write here will be confirmed by no one leaving any comments. It's so much more pleasant to just not know. It's actually cowardice in a way, but that's ok.

Summer is too short. I only have a week left of my 3 weeks at home before I go back out to Virginia and drive all my stuff from Purcellville to the University of Virginia and move in there to do 12 French credits in 9 weeks. I'm alternately excited and terrified. Mostly I try not to think about it. Even more than that, I keep having to fight the "I never want to leave home, I want to be a little girl again, I don't think that I can handle college after all" feeling.

But I know that this is a feeling that will pass because I'll have the strength to keep going when I need it the most, because God's never forgotten to come through before.

So far this post has broken all my old xanga post rules. It's not funny. It's not short. It's rambly. It's personal. Oh well, comments aren't enabled. =p

I did yoga today and actually liked it. My mom and Marla and I went downton and walked around and looked at stores and saw a movie and went to the Cheesecake Factory. And I liked that too. I want to keep my mommy with me forever, maybe.