republicangirl4ever's Xanga

i am leaving you all

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 13:28:02 GMT

and then she went on her merry little way.

Actually, I am relocating.... http://thestatueinthepark.blogspot.com/

I enjoy blogging (actually I adore blogging) but xanga just wasn't fitting my needs. I don't care too strongly for the social side of xanga.

That sounds bad.

Really, I simply want to post. And read my friends' posts, but without wading through the 'friending' or 'pulse' stuff.

So, I won't be updating here anytime soon.

(But I definitely am not going to delete this lovely site full of memories. )

Read me at http://thestatueinthepark.blogspot.com/

heaven

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 09:27:34 GMT

I don't think I will ever understand it. Not fully.   Not for awhile, at least.

I understand the overall concepts, but I can't see the big picture. I can't see the other side; I only see one-dimension.

It is like standing on a thin, opaque plain and suddenly noticing dull lights dancing on the underside of the plain. They are nearly lifeless and sometimes you aren't even sure they are there. But you know. You know. If you were able to creep to the edge and look over you would come face to face with a reality unlike one you experience on the plain.

We see the dull, nearly colorless colors dancing around. And that is all we can see right now.

I won't ever understand until I get there. How can I be living in an unreality? How can all right now be but a shadow? A vapor? A shimmering pale shade of filtered light? A mirage?

I feel joy, pain. I hurt. I hunger.

I laugh.

I feel. I see. I touch. I hear. I smell.

How can these senses be false? How will they be magnified?

How is there more than this?

But so asks the person who has yet to see the ocean and has lived in a desert his entire life. How can it be to the edge of the very horizon? How can it be so immense? How does the world hold it all?

I don't believe you.

But he is wrong. And his wrongness does not make the ocean disappear. It remains and it will still be there when he goes to see it.

The lights still dance on underfoot. But one day - very soon, in the scheme of time and history and eternity - we will all get to creep to the edge and then drop over.

The dirty, grimy filter will be behind us. And then we will realize that there is more than this.   So much more than this.

See you there.

hello again

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 08:23:10 GMT

It has been a while.

And I am sorry.

I enjoy posting on here. I don't know why I haven't been doing it.
It hasn't been outrageous busy-ness - just forgetfulness, I suppose. Unexcuse-able, I know.

Summer is bumbling along. It is a strange thought that I won't be in school in a few months. It defies the last thirteen years of my life. And one does not go around flippantly defying the past on a whim.

No, it is not a whim that is keeping me from school this fall. For nothing like a whim should have such power in one's life. Instead, I believe God is directing me on this course.

(Yes, God does direct us in ways counter to our culture often - and often we just don't like to listen to those directions.)

So, come September I will not be hitting the books, but instead trying to serve God and follow His lead.

And hopefully still updating this notepad.

[today i had...]

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 22:18:35 GMT

today i had a candid conversation with young children on the subject of heaven. i don't think it was capable of being un-candid. very few conversations involving children ever are.

but it was deep in a young-ish way. simply deep.

truth often comes from the mouths of babes. cliches don't lie.

they want everyone to not be grown up there, but instead to all be children. to be young.

they wondered if the new bodies they will have will be made of gold.

and if they will like potatoes when they get there. or maybe potatoes just won't be there at all.

an update [of sorts]

Sat, 16 Feb 2008 16:54:49 GMT

I know. It is pathetic.

But, this is how it shall remain. For at least a while longer.

One day, maybe, I will retire from public life and will simply update my xanga.

Until then. Well, yeah, until then.

i love my brothers

Sun, 20 Jan 2008 11:27:04 GMT

"Well, if I get enough scholarship money then I will hopefully live on campus next fall," I told him.

"I would have to come back and visit you on the weekends."

He looked up, half-amused. "Then," he began, "I will have to pull some strings and make sure that you do not get that scholarship money."

...

Thu, 17 Jan 2008 16:24:52 GMT

Hahaha.

Life is good. I am a dork.

I don't think I can explain myself any other way. Especially not on a day like today.

That rhymes. And that is unacceptably lame.

Ah, well. I guess I don't care. Though, the level of lameness remains dangerously high.

Anyway.

School is back.

The limo died.

And somewhere I need to find a vending machine.

Bye.

mybreak

Fri, 11 Jan 2008 22:38:17 GMT

life has been goodlately.

busy. reallybusy. but nottoobusy.

youknow.

there is busy that is notfunbusy. it is nastybadbusy.

but this has been goodbusy. not quite nastybadbusy.

ihave seen friends and had time toenjoy the breakbetweenwork.

and scholarshipstuff.

but ilook forward to thissemester.

being done at juniorcollege is going tobenice.

it was been agreatway for me to get my firsttwoyears done.

but iam ready to moveon.

towhat i don't know.

whatever God sends myway, iguess.

I have just been busy

Sat, 05 Jan 2008 23:01:06 GMT

Understand

Please

I have been bursting with things to write

Seriously

But I haven't had the time

Honestly

Maybe this Spring

Yes

Maybe

I will have more time

I hope

[but i sure did enjoy being busy]

Story Telling - Or an Attempt at It

Tue, 04 Dec 2007 20:08:06 GMT

I was telling a Sally Sue Story to my four-year old brother, Nate.

Yes, Sally Sue, so unoriginal it borders on both lameness and classicalness at the same time.

Anyway.

Sally Sue walked to the grocery store.

"Grocery store? Why not Wal-Mart?"

Okay, Wal-Mart.

The story progresses.

...

Sally Sue eventually buys many groceries after various adventurous episodes.

"Where does she put them?"

In her buggy, of course.

"But you can't take buggies home."

Of course. Hmm. She is actually Super Woman in disguise.

Exactly.