rika_11's Xanga

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Sun, 23 Oct 2005 15:47:53 GMT

CREATED

NEW XANGA..

^{if you know me well and is smart enough
you'll probably figure out the new xanga id. ciao.}

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Sat, 01 Oct 2005 14:09:33 GMT

goodbye ♥

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Wed, 28 Sep 2005 17:06:24 GMT

wow im so tired.
i think ive never had this less of a sleep before -_-

yay essa's gonna start working at the place i work at ♥

it's such a busy week i need to just relax.

-working more hours
-having more HWs. will cram.

^{i need to get a life..
will someone give me theirs?
or maybe sell it to me?}

Friday, September 16, 2005

Fri, 16 Sep 2005 16:57:05 GMT

kausap ko si essa sa fone nung 12th..
ndi ko lam kung naalala niya
pero di nman nia binanget so whatever.
wla na din akong cnabi..
bgo ko ibaba ung fone nag pause ako ng ilang seconds
tapos saka ko sinabing 'bye'
hindi nia cgro na-gets dahil nag bye din lang cia
oh well.

"saturday nite live" :
since i dont have to work this weekend i guess im going.
then sunday my sister wants to go to the movies
to see exorcism of emily rose

uhmm..

funny thing happend today. but i'm not telling :P

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Wed, 14 Sep 2005 20:00:54 GMT

wow. im so freaking stressed you have no idea.
it's all the little things you know
and one thing on top of the other..
im starting to hate everything!
and i start to get that feeling
that there's no place for me in this world
not even my room. MY ROOM!!!

effin shit.

i need a vacation. now!
i swear. ill start running over people.
no i dont have a car to run them over..
me myself is good enough :P

everyone is giving me all this shit today
im gonna start to crack im telling you
that quiet, shy girl you see every single day
thats a faux. trust me.
nobody believes me though..
well you'll see :P

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Wed, 07 Sep 2005 20:04:48 GMT

NO SCHOOL TOMORROW!!

^{imagine me dance around and sing a song..}

^{=O YAY}

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Tue, 06 Sep 2005 18:26:49 GMT

no time for long updates..
busy busy busy..

working on picture updates..
raining all week long.. it's gonna suck

essay, poems, outlines, and lotsa other crap to do.

phone bill again.. ugh.

when's our next vacation?

jake's bday this month ♥
still haven't figured out what to send.

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Wed, 31 Aug 2005 16:11:37 GMT

tony left work a few weeks ago
i didn't have time to post :(

but i got pictures and everything ^_^
we rule the kitchen YAY

uhm what else ..

-yea me and jake are back together *whoot*
-im flunking my online course.
my dad kicks me off the comp #$&^@*
-i don't get sleep anymore.
-apparently mark has a thing for me
and he expresses that by 'running me over' with his car -_-
-i haven't gotten my permit yet.
-i haven't reviewed for the SATs yet.
-im working again this weekend. prolly closing.
-and i have lotsa homework.

yep. ^{it's been pretty busy.
nuf whinin. got stuff ta do.}

^*edit

^{apparently i dont have to work this weekend.
(although i got a call this morning,
but i can't since my cousin is visiting)
and i was asked to work at the kitchen
im not sure if i should ..
uhm.. updates later
will be at the beach.}

Friday, August 26, 2005

Fri, 26 Aug 2005 18:22:09 GMT

someone shoot me.
^{i'm a failure.}

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Tue, 23 Aug 2005 21:05:52 GMT

wow. im a week behind in my online courses :(

and i got stuffy nose. eww.

^{thought id just say it straight out
although on the other end of the line
was dead, cold air.}

i didn't think it would hurt
to let go of something
that didnt seem to be there anymore

i got a literary piece i want to post later..
im not quite sure who the author is

but i think it's a masterpiece.

*edit

here it is

Unexpectedly you came. Indifferent and clueless
but
you had the aura of complexity. I didn't bother to
recognize the beauty that was innate in you for
it was just one of those senseless conversations
for me.

We were both minding our own pointless existence.

As the witty exchange of words drew us together,
it suddenly occurred to me that this was
different. You were different. I instantly noticed
how amazingly smart you were.

That and more. I was the black pawn. You were the
white knight. We were always on the same board
but
we never had our squares aligned. While I was
busy
protecting, shielding my own realm, you were
having your own share of victorious moments. I
took my steps one square at a time, constantly
being aware of the threat that haunted me for
years. Your valor radiated from within while your
horse galloped. Your mere presence was too
overwhelming for me not to notice.

You were my metaphor.

Your vagueness was intriguing me.

For some strange reason it was as if I understood
every crap you've been telling me. I just refused
to acknowledge the fact that they were affecting me
this much. I was trying desperately hard to resist
being dragged any further into this but the scent
of paranoia that once lingered in my whole being
seemed to have faded.

It had its toll.

You had me.

We both knew that we could not justify the
mediocrity
of it all. You once told me that caring for
someone over SMS was hypocrisy. Still you said
you
meant those words that you blurted out that one
midnight when I was about to hit the sack. How
ironic.

I had doubts about its sincerity, though. I told
you that. You didn't argue. You just understood.

I was confused that's why I just had to draw the
line. I didn't want to hold on to something that
was not even there. You assured me that it was
there, constantly hovering over my open palm.
Somehow I just
couldn't grasp it. Maybe because I was just trying
hard to get a grip of it for I feared that it
might go away. I realized that I wasn't letting it
have a chance to calmly rest on my palm. I know
you were just taking your time. You've been doing
that from the start. You would never know how
much
I appreciated you for that. You were just probably
as scared as I was. Not even half I bet, for now
you have everything to lose.

I'm nearing the end of the chessboard. Soon I'll be
transformed into a queen. I don't know how to
rule. This whole sense of sovereignty and royalty
is far too profound for me to comprehend.

Give me reasons to trust you.

Tell me you'll guard me with all your heart.

Tell me you'll erase the fear that I've been
having of falling in love.

Assure me that you're the one I've been longing
for and I'll forever be yours.

Check. Your move.