Hello to my beautifully retarded audience, I know you've all been almost pee-peeing in your pants in curiosity of how my senior year has been goin thus far.  You know how i roll, nothing but the best and the most ridiculous.

My perverted pledge sises trying to mack on me, and a PaPhi in the background letting us know the size of his manhood... yea fucker that's what you get for messing w/ my photo 

Two of my kids happy to see me after a long ass time after their painful birth... damn big ass heads

They then tryed to get some momma love... and hump my leg ... taken out of the picture for your viewing pleasure

... and T again... trying to get some from me... i dont understand my affect on women- what an amazing gift... if i were lesbian

Chillen with non- asians is nice, you don't have bright red faces, half drunken and drooling on your shoulder, just white faces... half drunken and drooling on your shoulder

 we ended up at one of their boyfriend's, it was like a magical, heavenly place... or like hell- depending on who you ask 

 Another random night out... who said all asians look alike... i mean chrissy is definitely another shade

 Superbowl, with both the guys trying to convince the girls to be on their side by making them smell their armpits

 Prefunking before Lupe Fiasco Concert... yea was thinking bout showing Lupe this seductive pic so he'd fall in love with us and make us his entourage... or at least scare him into giving us his diamond chain

 Mr. GQ of the year himself

 O yea, we beat Duke... twice... would you expect anything less?

Celebrating the victory... yea i don't get why i'm the only one wearing carolina blue either- but i'm sure the girls meant to wear it too

 Our Dean Dome, honoring the 1982 NCAA Championship team, when I become ruler of the world, i'm going to decree filling up this baby to make one big ass swimming pool

 O yes, Mr. Jordan and The Dean Smith

 Just in case you want a better look at his handsome, shiny bald head

 So ask yourself, what's one thing you HAVE to do before you graduate... yea that's right, slip in the bathroom of a bar and go to the emergency room... nice one T

 The dislocated elbow ... she's a smooth one

 Valentine's DAY... yea I know i'm a pimp... my flower is that tiny hot pink, individually wrapped one on the left .... from my roomate... i know what you're all thinking, don't hate aiite... less is more

 Who needs a valentine when you can go out for Alexis' birthday

Ladies

 Ask yourself how do you know when you're pimp?... when YOU get a lapdance FROM THE BIRTHDAY GIRL.... yea i told you... that's how i roll

 Mardi Gras Night with my girls and Alphas

  CCC in Beautiful San Luis Obispo, California

 o yea, cali girls... need I say more?

 ahem... you might wana wipe that drool off your mouth right now

 I was honorary San Jose... mmm being squished in the middle of them made me feel tingly all over

 San Diego/San Jose/ SLO FALL O3 PLEDGE BROS!... yea we'll be around... forever

 Beautiful California

 SPRING BREAK MIAMI

 lending out my name for a boutique... i try to give back ocasionally... even on my down time

 Hotel Shelley: our ghetto-fab hotel, equipped with a  dark hallways, pee-scented second floor, and happy hour 7-8 pm, don't ever go on spring break any other way

 4 out of 5 roomates

 The ladies of the week

 My favorite slav... ahem... wingmen came down to scope out my girls... Ross/Chris: "Hey girls where you goin tonight" My girls: "ummm, i don't think we're goin out tonight"... but repeated 3 nights in a row... pick up your game guys... pick up your game ahahha

 Miami sun... turned me mexican and leathery... what a dream

 Soaking up the skin cancer and sweatin out the alcohol... repeated all week

 Ladies dinner... yes we clean up nice... like a box of crayola

 yes we slut it up nicely also... guest starring stripper pole in the back

 ... the girls giving each other stripper lessons

 I'm having so much fun, i can do it half blind with hair all over the place

 My alpha came down to playyy, wow ... look at that lucky bastard cheesin 

 Key West Day trip... the pretty water kept my ADD occupied for the whole 3 hr ride... it was so magical

 Central Florida boys buy 21st birthday girl drinks all night... cept it wasn't her birthday yet...I hooked her up... god i'm always giving back  and helping people out

Back to Miami: Club Sobe, ladies consume free from 11-12

Club Mansion probably the nicest club in miami... as I superbly display with my phototaking abilities here... you'll just have to take my word for it

Club Opium, some guy payed $40 for me to get in, what a highlight

ECBR: Southeast ladies

It's ok if you couldn't keep up, i can't even keep up with my ADHD self sometimes, you can bet ima keep living it up ... o and when i return to NY... ... it'll never stop

   Winter Break was like taking lunch money from the nerdiest kid in class when you forget your own- cheap thrills and dolla dolla bills yall , and I WOULDN'T HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY,

  It was full of laughs that lead to peeing in pants, tears (mostly from my SJU Alphas that i scrolled) and passed out birthday kids whose faces we tried to tatoo with fairies & butterflies. 

  BAACK @ UNC making sure I live up my LAST SEMSTER like a friggin fat, happy waddling penguin ROCKSTAR.  So obviously you little stalkers wanna see pictures: 

NEW YEARS EVE
ONLY PIC - b/c i decided not to charge my batteries so I'm left with this wonderful memory of little boys (will remain nameless) who decide to take a little feild trip before the festivities... yes they are all trying to get in to one room together... just to hold hands and sing Koom-bie-yaahh *fobby asian accent*

Night Out with my favorite Alpha Class- nah she's just naturally sexy looking like that, no liquids involved

Asked them to take a pic of the girls... and the fairies  decided to take the pic of the Prettiest girls I've ever seeen

Still sesshi 2.45467 seconds later

Pretty girl and Prettiest girl, she's shy...

Apparently hoping she'll wrestle her tongue w/ mine... get it however i can right

Familia, Yea I know.. my lil bro is the prettiest in the picture

Another Big and Little couple, one of which is thinking about granny panties and DDD hat-sized bras, yea you guessed it... it's wenky

Perfect shot worth a 1000 words, but summed in a few from of each of their expressions, "It's beginning to hurt"

Pledge Bro in stunna shades with guest appearance by pornstars poster

Pledgebro posing like a pornstar

Pledgebro beaten by above pledge bro, aww wittle baby squirtle bruises easily

Sad baby squirtle pbro goes to bed to dream of other pokemon family

SPENT TIME WITH MY MIDGET FAMILIA

Baby cousin, cute little cheeks that'll slide to her other end when she hits puberty

Older brother, who will probably be staked out in the window with a shotgun when his baby sister hits puberty

Little Cousin Kelly

Little Cousin Kelly kiddy porn

"It''s a Midwest Thannng:" MIDYEAR @ CHI-TOWN

Lil bro taking playgirl poses/shots of himself

Letting me be in the picture

Something wrong with this picture?... Obviously the wrong person is doing the grabbing of a little boy chest

Trying desperately to see the camera

SOUTHEAST on top of each other's backs w/ 1/2 a red face dryhumping Krystal's back... she seems to enjoy it-

Pledgesis Shine from UW, promised her a lapdance from my lil bro if she let me sit on her lap, she promptly threw my ass to the ground... guess she didn't want the lapdance

As you can see they love each other too...aand pinkfaced boy wants some too, no further words needed

Puck looks strangely unsure to be around us, couldn't tell you why...

Pbro makin it known not to mess with hiim, he'll shock you- that shit scared all teh girls away... including the 6'3, 300lb bouncer

Sightseeing Michigan Avenue, the castle I tried to climb into... Chicago Waterworks... and was promtly taken out like a dirty homeless animal

 It's been a Fabulous two weeks at home and I wouldn't have it any other way.  Yours truly has been quite the classy and good girl.  Only been out running amuck in the city once and bringing home the bacon every day at Nordstroms.  Work is good, cool coworkers my age and some grumpy old men who piss and moan like babies everytime I own them in a foot race to get to customers. 

How did the semster end you ask... Sisterhood Awards

UNC aKDF ... guest appearance by construction cone

1.  Loudest Sister

2. Chapter Alki

3. Most Likely to be on America's Most Wanted

4. Chapter P-I-M-P

5. Dressed to Impress...

I get my style from my grams... look at her Madam Fuzzy Purple Coat

and a spoon to beat her hoes with...

6. Peeping Tom

     I've learned more in this one semester than ever. 

    You come to realize that there are very few people that you truly trust and are loyal to and who will do the same for you. TRUST AND LOYALTY ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT QUALITIES ANYONE CAN COMPLIMENT SOMEONE WITH.  For me, once you've fucked with that, you're done in my book.  You get extra points if you can make me laugh. 

    You find your close group that you'd do anything for.  Those people for me are the buttsniffers like my roomates- ones I see everyday and love, my big sis, Michael Chen, my wing peoples, sisters who I look up to and my buddies from HS THAT I KEEP IN TOUCH WITH.  Basically the sluts that run up my text mssage bill, and I'm lucky for them. These peoples got your back no matter what. Don't get me wrong, I love meeting people and I love those that make me laugh and I love my sisters from other chapters that I keep in touch with, even they will have my back over some others.  

    You realize that those who you have been weary of and never had trust in, you probably never will.  Eh, you let those fly and don't let them affect you, be civil to them and keep it moving.  Keep your peoples close to you and the backboneless ones off..... simple.

    MY FAMILY WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR ME.   I know my brother and sister have my back and my  girl cousins that I grew up  with, and if  they don't I always beat them into having my back, nah what I mean?

   You know that QUOTE (someone find it for me)... "you realize that one day your best freind will let you down, you will break a few hearts and have yours broken, yada yada yada, so laugh like you've never laughed, dance like blahblabhblah, every minute upset is a minute lost being happy." It's true, sometimes you do realize you are uncompatable with people and you do your best to get along with them, even your "best freind" may BS and flake on you.  So you move on.  So that's why you cut out the bullshit and stress and you stick with what you know and love.

    It is relieving to cut out the people who you don't mesh with, not to say they are bad, just not good for you.  So it's different for everyone, things that make them happy and things that don't.  It's not that you cut out your responsibilities and say o whatever I don't wana deal with it, b/c that's just bullshitting yourself and those around you.  You take care of your shit and you do what makes you happy. 

     People are ALWAYS going to judge and gossip, especially of things they don't know anything about... "O he's gota be a player, she looks like a bitch, you're a sinner, ... he looks like he'd have a small penis" you know, the usual.  Everyone is guilty of it, just watch yourself that's all.  I love the word BITCH.  I personally see nothing wrong with it.  A bitch is someone who knows what she wants and how she wants it; she can tell it like it is and is classy enough to take criticism back.  I mean I think it's a compliment because would you really want to be called the opposite... Backboneless, fake, nice to people who you don't even like, but talk about behind their backs anyways?... So fellas, if you're ever called a Bitch... embrace it girlll . 

    I've even had people judge my letters.  All I have to say to the haters of my sorority is, YOU KNOW NOTHING OF WHAT YOU ARE NOT A PART OF, aka you don't know sisterhood unless yuse a sista fool... or if you don't have the patience, maturity or understanding to get to know.  Don't judge my sisterhood.  IT COMES DOWN TO THE FACT THAT I KNOW I WILL BE THERE FOR MY SISTERS WHEN TIMES GET HARD.  You just gotta smile and turn around, moon the haters and tell them to kiss your buttcrack.

    I'm always for learning more and laughing till I pee my pants.

     For those of you who don't like what you see, just don't read it or go and "anonymously report," b/c I know who sees my site... it's called a tracker geniusses   Don't judge, move along your little way.  ... my Crude humor at its finest. 

       So it's that wonderful time at the end of the semester... again.  My rigorous finals list includes the likes of Russian Fairytales and Intro to Hungarian.  Hey, don't judge, some of us learn slower than others ok, that and I'm a senior biches, yea you love it, as do I.  So what else better to do right now than procrastinate, hide behind bookstacks to jump unsuspecting football players for adderol and bring some laughter and fatboy chuckles to all of your lives... and it begins...

 Lambda Class Installs

We'll  begin with the best family line... ever ... in the history of the moons and the stars... The Extreme Family Line, love us, live us, breathe us, sniff us... Heartbreaker, Sweetheart, Born Wise &Sexy LInES aint got nothing on us, because sadly... we are also the best looking line, sorry to those hopefuls out there. 

Yeaaa buddy, told you we're good looking, this face is where those after me got their seshy looks from.

Thetas FALL 03, what else but pimpest class... in the history of the Universe's Mom.  Extreme, Sweetheart, Heartbreaker LINES all rolled into one class.  Like a Turducken (Turkey stuffed with Duck stuffed with Chicken), gota love the Food Network for new vocab...

UNC & DUKE, yea if I were them, I'd be scurred to be within ten feet of us also.

Beautifully Special Duke Charter Twin: "C'mon Sabrina my lips are soft, stroke it"  ME: " um OK, close your eyes first... now put your luscious lips by my big plump toe"  ... Did you really expect me to bring anyone else to my 23498234th installs?... please

So you wonder why I always ask my twin to installs... He knows enough to fetch me a drink with a glowstick , something shiny to  quench my A.D.D. for 3.454 seconds of silence for himself before I bounce off the walls...  again. 

Mi Scuzzi basking in euphoria from getting one of our hottest girls to touch him for milliseconds... yea the most ass a Dukie can get. 

My beautifully retarded kids getting showered with all the gifts that their  skinny little penis arms can carry.

RUSH UNC aKDF SPRING 2007... can't hate me for the shameless pub.

 House Picture apparently with me trying to backhump my Baby#3 like a puppy that needs to be spade.  Yes I'm also glad I picked the smallest one in the chapter to do it to also, she couldn't move the next day... that's real initiation.

 Last final: Tuesday DECEMBER 12th,

BACK TO NY 13th for a month of ridiculousness and painting the city friggin rainbow, slaving away at Nordstroms for the 3rd holiday season with old men yelling at me for taking their customers, returning to Loehmans, and most likely highlighting New Year's Eve's Access Party.