HOla EvErYoNe!

been a awhile since i've been on here. Wanted to tell my fasting buddie "SO SORRY I BAILED ON YA<my week was insane that week>BUT IF YOU WANNA FAST IM HERE" that goes for anyone who wants to fast with me...im not to sure which way i wanna do it....soup or ice or smoothie or green tea....I just know i wanna lose fast ASAP for the SUMMER. i need to smoke some herb BAD! calm me down...work is stressin' me.....i shroomed out last night around 10 oclock and stayed awake pretty late so im draggin' today! but it was so fun!!!!!!!!! I LOVE TEXAS!!!!!

OMG it's been forever!! so much has happened in the past few months...here we go!!!

first i got a really awesome job working with the government!!! (no joke) and it's been going great

another is at this work i meet this gorgeous of a guy...but he's a co-worker....if any one understands...what do i do??? he's be flirting terribly and i like him alot but isn't it in appropriate??? keep in mind we both have relationships outside of work!!!!!

Third of all i got a awesome house with my roomate and boyfriend for the time being.....who knows....it's two bd 1 1/2 bath big front porch patio that is screened in so when we smoke at night out side the bugs wont eat us...or our weed...lol

My schooling is takin' a sluggish toll....but ill make it through safely..w/out hurting my GPA to much!!!!

Another since this HOT GUY has been around for me to look at i motice i need to lose a few pounds 10-15 lbs. AnY ONE is more than welcomed to join me is this fasting for slimness....heehee

It's been so long since i have written in here. i need to get on more often. I got a job! It's a good job.....bad things is it is from 11pm to 9 am so its tiring, but i get to study and do homework, although i havent done homework since ive been working there.  What i do is take care of two elders that live in my community, like house sitting. The pay is good 390.00 a week. Not bad since i'm also a full time student. Thats a good thing so far.

Me and boyfriend got into a huge fight and we havent talked for days, im willing to talk to him but he needs to apoligize for what he called me. That won't happen soon just because hes a retard like that and imature so he thinks he right, i know im wrong for provoking him but there was no room for a foul mouth. Raising voices is fine, not talking to me is fine, to tell me im wrong is fine (if i am...im very honest about it) but to curse at me and call me  a stupid bitch in front of my family (sister) or in my house NOT FINE! I dont know what to do about it?!! Someone Please help me!! i dont know how to go about telling him im not accepting of verbal abuse and i am not taking it again or ever.  Agghhh why can't relationships be less difficult than they are.

To top it all off I got a phone call from an ex boyfriend from like 4 or 5  years ago. (daitng recent boyfriend a year) he called to see how i was doing and that he was in town once again where i live. he asked what i was doing tonight, which was a saturday, the same day me and my B/F got into a fight, since i wasnt going to go out i figured i stop crying over spilt milk and go out with him. It was about 10:15 at night when he came over and i left. He took to me to the lake to watch the stars and drink a few beers. he boought a 6 pack so it wasnt like i was getting drunk. he drank 5 and i had 1 and some pot i had left over only a bowl which we both shared. we talked about what has happened in the last 4 or so years. My heart pounded not knowin what to say and my guilty conscience was killing me. he brought me home at 11. Like an idiot i gave him my email and AM although he hasnt Imed me. he's been calling everyday to talk and see what im doing since he has no old friends here in town. I feel guilty leading him on like we can be friends and i DONT KNOW HOW TO FIX IT! i need help i gotten myself in a huge ass Hole and cant getout. I did it to get my B/F jealious but i havent talked to him anyways, which im dont know if i should tell him or not. Nothing Happened You know!.? And also he wants to do this again..and i dont know how to say no and if i did why? he's not a threat to my relationship just using him as a weapon against my b/f. If anyone read this i would be glad to take any pointers. I never had a ex come back practically from the dead and never had a B/F that i did this too.....HELP