sheLL_be_your_zombie's Xanga

never meant to be so cold.

Thu, 20 Apr 2006 00:26:07 GMT

I don't need no arms around me
I don't need no drugs to calm me
I have seen the writing on the wall
Don't think I need anything at all
No don't think I'll need anything at all

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Sun, 16 Apr 2006 18:50:17 GMT

ahem....

my cock is much bigger than yours.

<3brittany

Monday, April 03, 2006

Mon, 03 Apr 2006 01:55:00 GMT

goodbye ol' friend....

we shall soon meet again.....

just....smile.

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Wed, 29 Mar 2006 03:05:54 GMT

...it struck me ive been waiting since birth to find a love that would look and sound like a movie...

Im gonna write as much just stuff as i can. maybe it will "help" or something.

ugh

nevermind i cant do it... i just wish for that friendship so badly again.

i might as well not even exsist...

i dont want this anymore, theres way tooo much life out there. to just be here in this dead end town & boring streets. i want action. i want awesome. i want....

i cant wait. to be happy. someday. so soon.

maybe things will change & it ll be beautiful again. thinking about adventure, free spirit experiences, so many wonderful things. its just ... now i might have to go alone...go on my own.... & all i can hope is that i can do it. it looks like i have no choice. it looks like the decision has been made. its ok i guess. i can get thru this...i have once before.

i am heaven sent, dont you dare forget.

Friday, March 24, 2006

Fri, 24 Mar 2006 14:05:22 GMT

standing motionless

i see you there... you dont notice me.

Ive been lost in your eyes, i must confess.

But i refuse to lose myself in such dirty deeds.

This is the last time you'll fall forever.

Im just a wicked girl without a cure.

The demon inside me has never been so clever.

So farewell my dear, be aware my love, Someday I'll be back....

to bring down this world we should adore.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Tue, 21 Mar 2006 14:49:35 GMT

RAWWWWWWWWWAAAAAARRRWWWRRRR\\\\

OZZFEST

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 05:17:56 GMT

"Hurt"

I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything

What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of thorns
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here

What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way

so lost, so hurt, so sorry...so fuckin sorry.

i lost everything. everything.... i have realized that some things were the most precious things any lucky girl would ask for. & i ruined it. im so fuckin ashamed. now here i am. its 5:22 in the fuckin morning & i look dumb writing in this thing.

oh.... what have i done.

what have i fuckin done.

</3

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 16:05:53 GMT

last

to all my friends/everyone....

i love you all. u all meant/mean a great deal to me. i will admit i got some problems..some issues...something.... but i never wanted this. to be the center of drama not even ... just to be a part. i hate it...u hate it. we all fuckin hate it u guys. hey remember chrissys 2 fuckin crazy weeks... its pretty much when i met all u fuckers. hahah i love you guys man. u guys didnt even know me & gave me a chance ... then another...then another... u guys PLEASE hear me out today.... i dont want to lose ANY of u... but if i must or u must u dont have to like me or want to be around me. its ok. im a bitch. sometimes. i kno. im sorry. but u guys. fuck man... ill never find friends like u... before i get all fuckin emotional & blur the screen.... ill just leave this last entry saying... thanks for all the good times. i only hope theres more

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Sun, 12 Feb 2006 05:33:34 GMT

.........

ok, we do it internet style .... fine here it goes. im sorry. ha yeah famous last words right. but what else am i supposed to say. why do other people have to tell me whats so fucked up about me & how much of a horrible person i am. well im letting u know that i wish u just didnt go writing & commenting me things like that. if things need to be said... say them. thats all. thats it. please. i never meant to have this happen again. it hurts so bad a second time tho. but thats ok i guess. im sorry to who ever i ever EVER hurted in my life. to be honest, i never thought i could ever hurt anyone. i was always the one getting hurt. by boys, my dads words, school.. things like that. but especailly by someone who i used to love so so much. i know i know u guys i know how u feel when u lose someone u love so much. i kno.... i did some fucked up things to myself to prove how lovestuck i was. but i kno hes sorry about the bullshit & now everythings ok. & all im asking is can this please just be all over. no more fighting. no more hating. but & im sorry to say it but theres gonna be secrets & there always will. but just for the record me & tony are broken up & we have been for quite it a little time. ... & what else happens in my "love life" stays with me & that other person. thats non of anyones concern. thanks. i cant take this anymore u guys.

i just want everything to be just fine. just friends. just whatever you know.

who the heck has time for fuckin drama anymore?

Monday, October 10, 2005

Mon, 10 Oct 2005 19:47:02 GMT

EVERYONE PLEASE JUST STOP TALKING ABOUT ME LIKE I DONT EVEN EXIST! STOP. please. just...stop