shha's Xanga

Well it's about time somebody ranted about school!

Sat, 24 May 2008 23:13:00 GMT

Part 1

The following is most of a journal entry that I wrote for English class when I was in public school last year. It's basically a rant. lol. I hope someone gets some entertainment out of this, and I also hope that the people who read this, now have some insight of what might go through a students head sometimes.

10/11/07

Freewrite

I don't normally like free writes. Perhaps school just has a way of sucking the creativity out of one's thoughts and actions. Everything always has to revolve around a schedule. There's always a schedule. When you put learning on a schedule though, it doesn't always work out that great. In school, it's like we are forced to learn something just so we can pass a test and get out of high school. I'm all for getting out of high school and all, don't get me wrong, but what if we didn't learn as we should have because we had to stick to a schedule? School doesn't really foster creativity either it seems. I guess to some degree it does, but we are told what to do, how to do it, and when it is supposed to be done by. We even have to have a certain amount of hours simply to pass, no matter the grade of the student. And as soon as some big wig decides to change the rules and mandates or something, everyone is expected to conform. It's kind of like the teachers are even robbed of freedom. They teach out of what they are given. Therefore they teach what they are given. This case may not apply necessarily to all, but it seems to apply. Where did the freedom to teach go? "Oh...wait I know... It went out the window when the state mandated tests paraded through the door." What's the point of going through classes to learn how to teach if all you can do is teach the text book? Again, the case may not always be so. Do teachers teach to test their memory of recitation or do they teach for others to learn? Do they teach because they are told to or because they want to? Do teachers teach for test passing or child mentality passing?, because I think there is a difference. Some teachers may trully love to teach, but how can they in such a political atmosphere? Maybe the principals should take their mind off of what their school's test scores are and focus on people actually retaining something besides filth. Who cares about the stupid school rank anyway? Principals probablly (might) get paid more when it's higher. If that's the case, then someone should introduce a 'principal for the people' instead of a 'principal of pomp'. The school board should simply stop worrying about were our state is ranked in test scores. If the kids got educated but fell asleep during the test, then what's the problem? Educated people are expected to be successful...economically speaking. If the legislative bodies and Governer ( insert name here ) want the economy to grow, then quit putting pressure on everyone and maybe ( state omitted. lol ) can get back on it's feet again. There goes the money talking again. Teen angst might not be so prevalent if we had more free time (haha). School is about 10 months out of the year. Summer is only about 2. Is it just me or has summer gotten shorter over the years? They (The infamous "They" being whoever) want us to be more responsible. They also want us to go to college. They may also want us to get a job and provide some for ourselves. My question is; How? School at school may revolve around a schedule, but school at home (homework) regretfully enough does not. I spend an average of maybe 7hrs. and 30 min at -and for- school. But then it's still not over. I come home only to do homework. Yeah, more work for school at home. Just what I wanted to spend my social and teen developmental time on. I do my homework, or not, and go to bed only to wake up and do it again. How are we supposed to be responsible young adults with a steady income when we don't have time for a job? And we are supposed to be teenagers. This is supposed to be the fun part of our life. (and by fun I did not mean anything stupid) People (may) say "Well it will be over before you know it." Well that's all fine and dandy, but I don't want to spend the next 2 years of my life not enjoying it. I don't want to feel like the whole of the next 2 years were wasted when I am forced to recall some dreadful portion of it. I don't want this year and next to be "over before I know it" either. Now, I'm a time waster, but it is 12:51 A.M. right now. Guess what I'm doing. Homework! And I've got a 200 (yes that's right, 200) question test tommorrow. I had a 100 question test in his class and only got finished with 80 something. So how am I going to finish 200!?!? With 60 min. of class and 200 questions (foretelling my imminent doom), that makes 3.3 questions per minute. There are 60 seconds in a minute. That's (about) 18.18 seconds to contemplate each question. No, I reiterate myself, that's 18.18 seconds to contemplate AND distinguish (or guess) the question and it's answer. They are biology II AP questions. Oh the joys of the cell and the wonders of mitosis. Bologna to it all, Goodnight!.... Well, Good Morning. Being 12:59 now, I will wake up in about (Now it's 1:00) 5 hours. Bah Humbug. Health professionals say we need 8 hrs of sleep. How? I don't want to grow up to be a scientist drearily stuck in his lonely lab, with rats to talk to. Whoops! 1:02, see ya!

The end. ha ha, maybe some one got some entertainment out of that, and maybe it's sparked some thought otherwise un-touched. This is only part one of the school topic. And no, don't worry, there will be no more English class journal entries on the topic, but I have some other things to bring to thought, So please stay tuned. And as normal feel free to go back and read my last 4 or so posts.

Monday, April 07, 2008

Mon, 07 Apr 2008 21:18:37 GMT

Life is what matters

It's the choices made while living

that make an impact on someone elses life when you're gone

Life is what matters

If you've lived a good life

people know, they've seen it

And you've accomplished something

your life makes their liveing worth while

and their liveing makes your life something to remember

Life is what matters

If you've only got one life, then it makes sense

not to wish such a wonderful tool away

make life worth while

Live,

if only for another.

Because though they've never told you

They're liveing for you

They see what you do

You make their life something to

Remeber

Life is what matters

It's a poem that I wrote a long time ago. I changed very little of it. I hope someone gets something from it. People see what you do. People see the good things about you. And people see the bad things. Life can be tough. But live, even if you are liveing for someone else. Because -you- make their life worth liveing. And who knows.... -They may be liveing because of you-

-Live-

( as always, feel free to view Faith or Fact, the post before this one. It contains some reasons why I believe in God......and more than just philisophical babbling. For those of you who can't think of any reason to believe in God, check it out. Even those of you who have reasons why you believe in God, I would urge you to look at it anyway. Thanks. )

Faith or Fact?

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 17:13:03 GMT

Is God a matter of Faith...or a matter of Fact?

Some hold that God is merely a matter of opinion. Believe or don't it won't matter anyway.

Others choose to believe in a God rather than to believe that we came from a literal nothing. And so they put their hope in God....at least when they remember to.

Others may say they believe in God, yet act as if they don't.

Some think that man made God, instead of God made man.

Some may think that God is synonymous with Santa Clause. Who magically flies around the world in one night delivering presents to kajillions of sleeping children all the while never being seen and without leaveing sooty footprints on the carpet.

Some believe that God exists whole heartedly.

So...is God a matter of Faith? Or is God a matter of Fact?

My AP Biology II teacher once asked something like: "If your faith told you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?"

What he refered to as faith was schizophrenia.

I have faith that the sun is going to rise.Why you ask? Because I have seen it. It has done so all of my life. I have faith that if I do jump off of a bridge, the forces of gravity are going to pull me down. Why? Because I have experienced the effects of the force of gravity. Gravity is not a mental state of mind. I tried to fly when I was younger. Guess what happend. I landed on the ground. And even after trying multifple times, I still didn't fly. I have faith that if I jumped off the swing set trying to fly today, I would still fall to the ground, this time with more pounds to pull me me down. Faith is not a voice in your head telling you what to do.

Myself just like every other reasonable person has questioned their faith. How do >I< know that God exists? It is not in-human to wonder if God is real.

And so I ask: What is your faith in God built on? If you have no faith in God, then I ask, is there a reason apart from philisophical babblings to put any sort of reasonable, logical faith on?

I have faith that the sun rose this moring. But I have a reason to tell you that I have faith it happened. And I have faith that gravity is pulling me down right now. But I'm not exacltey floating around in space now am I?

I want more reason to have faith in God than, 'Wait here while I go get my preacher.' And I want more reason to have faith in God than 'His love works in my heart, I just know He's real'---Good luck convincing anyone with those statements.

Maybe the reason that so many people don't want to be converted is because there are so many people who can't even tell why they believe in God. I dare say the people who can't tell you why they believe in God, however, don't look for it either.

If you want to know why I believe in God. Keep reading. And you'll find some reasons that you probablly haven't heard from your friend or their preacher.

As a christian, I want to show you evidence of my faith. So think about this. How do we know about God? No not your 3rd cousin's twice removed preacher. Keep thinking.....yeah, that's the one....the dirtly old book on your Grandma's coffee table. The Bible. So isn't it logical to assume that if God is real, then there has got to be something more to the Bible than good morals and fairy tales?

Job, a guy in the Bible, said talking about God, "He stretches out the North over empty space; He hangs the earth on nothing."(Job 26:7) So what! you may say. Keep reading. The people of Jobs time, not being advanced scientifically as we are, believed that the earth was suspended on the back of 4 elephants standing on the back of a giant turtle. Others believed that the earth was suspended on the shoulders of an un-naturally strong man. Even in Native american stories we see the falsities of what the earth is. So to the point. How did Job know that the earth was literally hanging on nothing? How could he have without the inspiration of the God who made it all?

Isaiah, another dude in the Bible, said referring to God, "It is He who sits above the circle of the earth,.." (Isaiah 40:22) You may have read about this in a history book sometime in the past. But people once believed that the earth was flat. And they believed that in comparitively recent history. The Hebrew word that Isaiah used for circle literally refers to something that has roundness, or sphereically. Isaiah would not have known that the earth was not flat unless guided by the creator of it. He would have had no reason to think that it was not flat.

In the book of Job, (same guy from earlier) God asked Job, "Hast thou ( or- Have you) entered into the springs of the sea? Or hast thou walked in the recesses of the deep?"(Job 38:16) Another word for recesses is a trench. In earlier years it was thought that the seashore was the same as the beach, but extending from continent to continent. If they could not see that far into the water, why would they believe differently? It was not until 1873 that a team of British scientists in the Pacific ocean found a recess 51/2 miles deep. Later another team found one deeper. How did the book of Job say that there were recesses of the deep, when recesses of the deep were not found until centuries after the Bible was completed?

Psalm (another Bible book) 19:5-6 says that "His (<the sun) going forth is from the end of the heaven, and the circuit unto the ends of it; and there is nothing hid from the heat thereof." It was once thought that this verse teaches that the sun revolves around the earth, an understandable thought. However, it is not teaching this. It was somewhat recently discovered that the sun is actually moveing through space. It is not stationary as once thought. The sun is estimated to be moveing through space at about 600,000 miles per hour. And in an orbit so large that it would take an estimated 200,000,000 years to complete simply one orbit. So how did the writer of the book of Psalms know that the sun has a circuit? Lucky guess?

Moses told the Isrealites that "Life of the flesh is in the blood." That's found in Leviticus 17:11-14. Years and years after the Bible was written people bled to death because of leache treatment. Leaches literally being used for ill founded medical treatment killed humans for loss of blood. The Hemoglobin in blood cells make life possible, due to the oxygen that's carried. Finally science catches on and decides that takeing the blood from sick individuals has the capacity to kill them. In the Old Testament of the Bible, circumcision was to be performed on the 8th day of a baby boy's life. The 8th day wasn't simply a random number of symbolism. So why was it the 8th day instead of some other day? In 1935 it was discoverd that Vitamin K. was the substance in foods helps prevent hemorrhaging in baby chicks. Vitamin K makes the production of prothrombin in the liver possible. If Vitamin K. is not present then prothrombin won't be likewise. Therefore there will be hemorrhaging without these substances present. In other words, the blood won't clot right without them- causeing the baby male under question to bleed to death. Only on the 5th through the 7th days of a baby males life will Vitamin K begin to be made. Now it is only on the >8th< day that the percentage of prothrombin exceeds 100%. Literally the best day to give a baby male a circumicission without the modern prothrombin injections we have today. So did Moses have modern scientific and medical knowledge that we have today? Or was he God inspired?

What about the global flood of Noah's time? A man named Edward Suess published a study of the geologic framework of all countries. The research he conducted led to his discovery that all land surfaces had been under water. Even mountains.

What about Noah's ark? Could all of those animals fit aboard the ark. The measurements for the ark are found in the book of Genesis 6:15. A taxonomist, Ernst Mayr lists 17,600 animal species. Including mammals, reptiles, ampibians, and birds. Think of a sheep as the average size animal. A sheep is bigger than a dog depending. We used to have some. I've seen them. It has been calcuated that 522 box cars would fit on the ark. Taking sheep as the average animal size, 240 sheep will fit on one 2 level boxcar. Do the calcualtions yourself. All of the animals that the Bible says would fit, will fit. And space for food, and Noah and his family would be left.

The list goes on....

A big thing in schools is evolution. But if evolution were true, there would be evidence of it in the fossil record. If evolution was true, the lower you go in the fossil record, the fewer fossils you would find and with progressively simpler organisms. There is no evidence of evolution in the fossile record. The fossil record is preserved tangible history of the past. Why then does it argue for God instead of against him? There have been many attempts to justify evolution with fossils. Deeming them the "missing link". All have been proved false.

Please do more research yourself. Is my faith based on something logical? I believe it is. I recommend the book -INVESTIGATING Christian evidences- Or use the computer. It's right in front of your face. If you're in a library on the computer, then take advantage of it. And take advantage of the library. Ask for books to be transferred to that branch.

"If there ever was a time when nothing at all existed, then there would be absolutley nothing today. It is an axiomatic truth that if nothing exists, then "nothing" will be the case ---always, for nothing simply remians nothing. If there is absolutley nothing but nothing, nothing and something, applied to the same object, at the same time---are mutually exclusive terms." Wayne Jackson-

"Since it is the case that something does not exist, one must logically conclude that something has existed always. Let us state the matter again: If nothing cannot produce something, and yet something has existed always....The question then becomes this, 'What is the "something" that has been in existence always?" WJ- ...God.

much of the material discussed was taken from www.newtestamentchurch.org/html/Christian_Evidence/Science_in_the_Bible.htm

There is an plethora of evidence backing God and the Bible. And backing my faith. The website cited even has something about Numerics in the Bible. Check it out and let me know what you think!

My faith rests on fact. The evidence points one way. Just take a few more minutes to look at the evidence. You decide.

-Don't dismiss the idea of God, simply because YOU haven't investigated the matter-

Edit: I realize that one can have faith without haveing any proof. Such was the case with myself once upon a time. However, I'm glad that there is evidence for God.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Fri, 15 Feb 2008 22:51:39 GMT

The doom of depression is darkening my mind.

I can't feel emotion

I've forsaken it with time

where there used to be one

now there is two

the good one, that's me

the not so....that's you

where did you put the pencil

I can't find the paper

What's wrong with you

and what's happened to me

Is it my fault?

I can no longer see

The things on the inside are a little dismantled

So if the tears fall around my eyes

It's not me

I'm in pieces right now

I need putting back together.....

friend would you mind trying somehow?

If I seem a little un-careing

It's not me

It's him

I would come out and show you

that I really do care

But he's hidden me from him

He's made me nothing

But sunken and dim

Friend don't forsake me

I need you right now

I'm trying so hard to break from myself

to be myself

to see myself

and not the other me

That's not me

That's caught me

I know I know better

because friend you've taught me

I want to be reminded

So don't let him get to you

The boy on the outside

Doesn't want you in here

But friend I beg you

Don't leave me with myself

Don't give up

Don't hide

If it takes crossing the line

un-comfortably

and getting a piece of my mind

Then take it

and give a piece of yours in return

It may take crossing the barbed wire

into me

myself

my own worst enemy

Then do it.

Right now

Well...right now

My reflection is fadeing away

Please don't give up

Give me the time of day

to tell me I'm wrong

and that it will be ok

Because after all

The upside to every down side

Is that it has

an upside

Right?

Just don't give up

Give me a fight

The guy on the outside,

He know's that he's right

But he's wrong and I know it.

Your my friend

I know your my friend

> Don't be afraid to show it<

Don't leave me with myself

if you do I might win,

on my knees,

-Sean-

Forget the pencil. I found a pen. The pen is my keyboard....with paper within.

To all who took the time: "Friends.....Don't forget your friends. You can make a difference when he may have forgotten how to help himself' make one."

+Drugs = -Lives

Sat, 09 Feb 2008 19:59:31 GMT

What is with all the drugs? Drugs.....man's solution for every problem....and the stain of society that plagues the one's who could have been great, and still can if they only would. I've never done drugs. I know call me crazy...but I haven't. Why is that? Could it be that I have broken the system and chose to learn from others mistakes, lessening my own?

And why are so many people giveing in to this mess? You know that it's not the same country your grandparents were raised in when, a girl from school has gotten high with her boyfriend....and her mom. People really don't care that much about well being of others....or themselves sometimes. I read something today,...a cop said something like, 'I estimate that 85% of the burglaries that I investigate are due to crack.' Does what that cop said have any effect? So an estimated nearly 85% percent of the burglaries that he has investigated, would never have occured if it wasn't for crack cocaine. One of my friends has done drugs....and not just tried them,...I mean used them. And she went through the process of getting off of them, and I can tell you that she is a better person for it. The sad thing is though,...she wasn't the odd one out for useing drugs,...she wasn't alone. She takes the idea of drug use and acts as if it's nothing new. Now, she doesn't do drugs anymore, and she won't recomend them. But what I mean is that it's not an un-natural occurance to her. And the sad thing is, she's pretty well right about all that. It isn't an un-natural occurance. It happens. When you've seen someone high in Gym class, I guess it's a reminder. This really happens. And that kid did something that he'd be better off if he had not done. When you can remember someone smokeing weed at lunch time...you know it really happens. The same girl that got high with her mom ( and no I wasn't kidding about that ) brought a makeshift drug pipe to school. I'm not going to say how it was done....but the drug heads will do just about anything to have their fix, So why isn't there a faction of people equally as hostile against drug use?

The drug useing community has come up with names for drugs....and more names for drugs....and in the future to come, perhaps more names will spawn, but in reality the same mind numbing trash is behind it all. Take in the thought of the synthetic drugs. They point out to me that there are intelligent minds behind the mask. Think on how productive they could be if the people who spent their time manufacturing synthetic drugs and distributing them, would put their efforts in saveing lives istead of killing them. I know things would be better without drugs, but why can't everyone see that? In the effort to stop the spread of aids from needles used to inject crack some have resorted to giveing away free drug pipes to those addicted. That way, they can smoke crack instead of injecting it,...and hopefully lessen the spread of aids by the use of un-sanitary needles and the shareing of those needles. But wait....Here's a bright idea..., why don't those same people who spend the money to by crack pipes and worsen the condition of the crack head.......instead spend their money establishing drug rehab centers and give rehab for free. That way......they can actually help somebody! There would not be such a problem with shareing needles and spreading HIV if the people addicted to drugs were no longer addicted.

Maybe people just aren't educated enough. I'm not talking about the educational videos with the classic "Let's see what she's won" voice. I mean other people being concerned about the problem of drugs and talking about it. People don't seem to think that drugs have the capacity to kill. According to Alexander Yanevsky ( a department chief at the Drugs control services ) Nearly 20,000 Russians die every year from diseases connected with drug addiction. And about another 10,000 die every year due to overdoseing. That makes about thirty thousand individuals that lose their life due to drugs every year in Russia. Now a great many Russians have the apparent capability to get their hands on drugs. And some readers, may be thinking,....well it's a good thing I don't send my kid to Russia for school......But I can tell you, it's not a lot different here in the U.S. Thankfully the drug supply and demand, may not be as great here as in other countries. But if I can get drugs if I wanted them, whose to say that 30,000 can't do the same? Yes,...drugs do harm the body. Yes they do kill. Not doing drugs isn't just advice given to you when you were in 5th grade. Does 30,000 lives a year in only one of our many countries, sound like something confined to 5th grade or drug ed? Let me pose a questions to all of you out there in xangaville and elsewhere who have ever wanted to try drugs. Does about 30,000 lives gone already sound like it's something you want to fool around with? It's not just something you can simply start doing and simply stop. It's addictive. It will be the equivalent of slow suicide if you let it. Do you want your brain to be affected like the man on the side of the road that talks to himself? And you can find humor in that last statement if you choose to....but seriously, Think about what your doing to yourself before you do it. Think about those who have gone on before you....who've lost their lives to drugs...Their lives, the only chance on Earth they're gonna get. Do you think if you could ask them right now if they think their drug use was worth it, they would honestly say yes? Don't let the idea that you won't be accepted, stop you from not useing drugs....because if you really feel that's the case, Than you are really eager for the wrong people's attention.

All you people out there, Drug addicts, Former drug users, Never drug users, anybody. Please give me some feedback. Make someone think. And think before you make......a bad decision.

Share the experience.

Is anyone ever amazed?

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 02:20:35 GMT

Is anyone ever amazed anymore? To look at something as simple as a freshwater catfish probablly isn't an appealing idea to many. Ewwww fish. Nasty.....slimy.....smelly.....swims only to eat..and eats bugs only to survive. And we eat it. But is anyone ever amazed anymore at the things that have what, to us is of little significant value? Can anyone look in something like a tank of freshwater fish and find beauty? I have found that it is not amazing that fish actually do have beauty. But in a way, I have found that it is amazing how beautiful these animals actually are. And no I am not talking from a hippie point of view. I eat fish on occasion. I eat plants too. I'm not talking from my stomach.....or because I choose not to use my stomach for digestion of the topic of beatuy. Fish can be beautiful. The intricate patterns, no matter how dull or dark......or no patterns at all. Even a flower. How many flowers do we see every day? Even in a big city......they have potted plants don't they? Or in the country.....or in what you wish was the country but isn't quite so.......Look in the old woman's yard and see what we are missing so much of. " Hey it's a flower....who cares?" I doubt anyone in the reading audience can wake up in the morning and be the most beautiful shade of yellow that the world has ever wittnessed. Come to think of it.......if you were, your pigmentation is definately not mine. Does anyone take pleasure in rain anymore? The farmers either think it's good or bad. You get too much, it's not good. You get too little it's not good. But what about everyone else in the world of hurricanes and baseball games? Look at the rain. Why don't you step into it once in a while instead of avoiding every drop that comes your way? Now, I'm human. Who wants to get there shoes muddy?.......So go barefooted why don't you? And snow....What's the fun of snow if you can't stand in the midst of it? Now I have never had the problem of snow comeing up to the bottom of my mailbox like part of Washington state is now experiencing......That doesn't sound like it helps daily life that much. But maybe it can serve as a good time to relax and take our minds off of the marbles we make into mountains of daily toil.....and put them on something that we may have failed to really take in the last bajillion times that they have happend. If the things that occur in nature don't captivate us? What does? I saw the sun set today.......one of the only one's that I can remember seeing in recent history.........And it was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. Think about the last time you actually looked at the clouds......Did you do it to complain about how it was going to rain....or did you think how cool it looked? I remember seeing a sky, that I wish my camera was present for. I remember seeing another piece of sky that I wish my camera would have picked up. The first made me think of a painting. But when I've thought about it......this was better than any painting. This wasn't put there by man for man. It was willed to exist. But why? In the grand scheme of things.....why was it there? If we can't be amazed by it, what is the point of it being there. Why was it one of the most gorgeous shades of orange I have ever seen? And if you've seen my page, you probablly get the idea that I like orange. Is anyone ever amazed or is the T.V. and bathroom as far as we venture to take ourselves in the moring. For those who are stuck rideing a bus to the dreadfull doom of school, do you ever look out the window? Ipods and Rock music turned up as high as you can get your headphones to go, only goes so far. You might enjoy the ride......and the ride of life a lot better if you would look out the window. Be amazed.

Is anyone ever amazed anymore?

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Thu, 17 Jan 2008 12:21:35 GMT

Blar dy Blar Blar. What do you do when the sky falls down? Seems rather hopeless to me......I mean an underground bunker is kinda cool.....but where would you realisticlly get the air required to breath from when the sky falls on top of everything? Wouldn't be kind of wet anyways.....the water cycle....wouldn't really be a cyle anymore....it would just be wet. Anywho.......All you peoples out in the world who have actually spent the time reading this....Have a wonderful day. And don't trip.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Tue, 17 Jul 2007 13:32:54 GMT

I'm back form camp and I must say, It was pretty stinkin sweet! Anywho, hope everyone and their mother is doing well.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Sun, 10 Jun 2007 10:35:48 GMT

Alright....so I'm off to yet another week of camp wich means that I won't be able to get to respond to anyone for a while, but alas, I shall respond. I will respond some time or other no matter how long it takes me. So until then, hang tight and stay cool. And don't trip over anything. And sorry Dorothy.....it will be even ore of a wait. lol. I hope everyone has a great week. Deff sho!

Summer

Tue, 29 May 2007 22:19:53 GMT

Summer is finally here....I have finally updated ( no matter how lame ) ....and camp is on the verge. Rock on. Can I get an encore for that?