the guilt.. the pain.. the questions.. 
the insistent pounding in my head.. 
torn to shreds.. torn to shreds
i'm torn to shreds.. 
the unspoken words 
how strange it feels on my lips.. 
why and how and how and why
did we fall into this dark crevice 
forever.. for never
the sanity that i'll never grasp
i've been dying for 21 damned years
one step forward two steps back
i stepped out into the light
breathe in breathe out
the breaths never made me more alive
yet these crazy nights 
the taunting.. the haunting 
these crazy faces dancing before my eyes
these slippery figures prancing in the dark
like a puppet on a string
maneuvered.. hands flagging heads flopping
round and round and round and round
everything's spinning
this crazy incessant droning.. 
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7
10, 9 , 8, 7, 6, 5, 4..
a rag doll on a swing
back and forth and back and forth
the darkness.. the starkness.. 
the screaming.. the scheming.. 
the screaming.. the scheming..
the s c r e a m i n g ! ! ! !
take a breath take a breath 
two fingers up the ribs..
clasp ur hands and make me breath
start pounding start pounding
watch my face turn to blue
blue green yellow red.. 
blue green yellow violet..
i've woken i've woken
he's woken the dead ! ! !
start running start shunning
keep running keep shunning
before he catches you
the chatter the tatter
watch ur blood pitter patter
hide and seek seek to hide ! !
98, 99, 100
they're coming.. he's coming..
i'm shaken i'm taken
fall to my knees burn my pleas
bit by bit, tit for tat
i'm left to bits..
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7..
the sirens the silence
the s i l e n c e ! ! ! !
                                                                  -Shirleen