| man vs. himself
man vs. machine
man vs. the world
mankind vs. me
the struggles go on
the wisdom i lack
the burdens keep piling up on my back
it's so hard to breathe
to take the next step
the mountain is high
i wait in the depths
yearning for grace
and hoping for peace...
dear God increase
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healing hands of God have mercy on our unclean souls, once again.
Jesus Christ, light of the world - burning bright within our hearts forever.
freedom - means love without condition - without a begining or an end.
here's my heart - let it be forever yours -
only you can make, every new day seem so new.
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looking back on today, only his grace and remembering my husband and little girl got me through.
but tomorrow is a new day - and his joy comes in the morning.
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i miss you mike.
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| psalm 139 - it's different when you're reading it about your own child -
...You know everything she's going to say,
before she even speaks her first word.
...i'll look behind her and You're there,
up ahead - You're there too.
...You shaped her first inside, then out -
you formed her together in my womb.
i thank you, High God - you're breathtaking.
body and soul - she is marvelously made.
i worship in adoration. what a creation!
you know her inside and out.
you know every bone in her body.
you know exactly how she was made - bit by bit,
how she was sculpted from nothing into something.
like an open book, you watched her grow from conception to birth -
all the days of her life were spread out before you.
all the days of her life prepared - before she's even lived one day.
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| wow. last time i posted was week seven. now it's... month seven. she's almost here.
xanga? wow. i've been out of this world for quite some time. i'm just not as dedicated i guess.
this and email seem to be the weakest yet best types of communication for me right now. my work hours don't quite permit me to make phone calls very often. which i apoligize for. i've hardly spoken to my family in wayne, ne since i left in mid-april.
what's happened since then? moved into a house (still getting settled), started a new job, and still preparing for a baby. all of which i consider blessings.
every day i seem to learn something new about myself. contentment and patience. why are these the hardest for me?
my husband is wonderful and i'll never understand his love.
these are the only thoughts i can pull together for now.
it's time for bed. goodnight.
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| week seven...
the baby has arms and legs... though no toes or fingers yet.
it starts to move around this week... although it's too small for me to feel.
how precious you are my little one. i can't wait to meet you. |
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| well...at least we thought we weren't pregnant.
God had other plans.
i'm 6 weeks along... and loving it.
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