Your friend is getting married in a month. She has been with someone for 5 years who is not very nice to her. She has debated on and off about the marriage, but has decided to go through with it. She calls you in tears and tells you that "He just told me to move out and that he never wants to see me again. He said he is sick of me and he doesn't care where I go, but wants me to stop calling him and be gone when he gets home from work."

You offer for her to stay at your place. She asks if she can bring the dog because "he won't feed him, give him the medicine, or take care of him in anyway; so, wherever I go, I have to bring the dog otherwise it won't get taken care of." You say, "Of course you can bring your dog."

Most of the night is spent with her talking about how she cannot believe how horrible he has been and she is seriously considering calling off the marriage. Somewhere in the midst of conversation, your dog and her dog get into it. Your dog is much bigger and takes a bit out of her dog, which requires a trip to the vet.

You offer to take her dog to the vet, but she says she will. You call her several times that day to ask how "littledog" is doing and she finally tells you that "littledog" needed surgery to the tune of about $600. You apologize profusely for what has happened, express that you are so glad that "littledog" will be ok, and ask for the exact amount of the vet bill so that you can reimburse her.

She thanks you but says she would be more comfortable splitting the bill because "I'm the one that asked to bring my dog over to your place." It seems to be the best solution to a crummy situation and she agrees to later tell you the exact amount of your half.

After a couple of days, you stop hearing from your friend. You call, you text, etc, but all responses are vague. "What are you doing?" "Nothing." "How is your weekend?" "Fine." You get the idea.

You learn a week or so later that she and littledog have returned to the home of her fiancee, but she tells you she is really busy and doesn't have time to talk much about it. 2 weeks later, you run into her at a charity function and ask if she wants to get a cup of coffee afterwards and she tells you that she cannot because she has to pick littledog up from the vet.

You ask what is wrong and she tells you that the surgery "didn't work" the first time and that they have just had to redo it so now the vet bill is up to about $1200. You ask her if littledog is expected to be ok and she tells you that he is. You ask her how fiancee is doing in relation to helping her with littledog (which is actually HIS dog, by the way) and she tells you "he is fine, but I'm not asking him to pay for any of this."

What do YOU do?

1. Suck it up and just pay the $600 (that you kinda can't afford...especially after you just spent almost $200 on the required dress for her wedding?) because she is a good friend and she's in an abusive relationship and is going to need your support sooner than later?

2. Tell her you will pay the original $300ish that was agreed on but really don't want to pay more since she hasn't communicated with you about the situation for a couple of weeks and you weren't given the option to get your vet involved or pursue a cheaper route?

3. Talk to her about why you feel that fiancee should be paying for some of this as well

4. Pretend that you are happy to pay $600

5 ????

There are so many really bad options for how to handle this. I'm looking for some good options. Any ideas/advice?

By the way, littledog IS thankfully expected to fully recover.

 

So it has been an amazing two weeks--

Had surgery, was out sick for a week from work, friend's baby died after a fully healthy 9 month pregnancy, Uncle Phil died, R's ex contacted court services and is sending him to mediation due to myself and my family creating instability in the childrens' lives, and now I'm in St. Louis and K thinks that I am dying.  Amazing.

I'd like to write more, but the computer here is right next to the couch that my Dad is sitting on while watching the Chiefs game.  Anyone who knows my Dad can imagine how distracting this is.